Advertisement
If you have a new account but are having problems posting or verifying your account, please email us on hello@boards.ie for help. Thanks :)
Hello all! Please ensure that you are posting a new thread or question in the appropriate forum. The Feedback forum is overwhelmed with questions that are having to be moved elsewhere. If you need help to verify your account contact hello@boards.ie
Hi there,
There is an issue with role permissions that is being worked on at the moment.
If you are having trouble with access or permissions on regional forums please post here to get access: https://www.boards.ie/discussion/2058365403/you-do-not-have-permission-for-that#latest

Help with loss of intimacy

  • 03-07-2009 8:22pm
    #1
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭


    Hi,

    I have been going out with by boyfriend for the last 7-8 years, the escat start date is vague! In the begining I was in college and he was working in a bar, which is where we met. We used to have great mornings of me mitching college and ending up in in dreary rented room with a blow heater in the bed eating breakfast rolls watching American Pie - and the rest!

    Things work wise obviously changed but we stayed together. We were both living at home and kept it that way to save for a place of our own. About 18 months ago he had an opportunity to train for a job which would give him a career for life. We were based in Dublin but this had involved him moving to munster. He is at the final stages and I am planning to move asap...but

    In the last year intimacy has been a BIG issue. There have been no affairs but we are lucky if we 'do it' once every month or so. I have tried but it is difficult when someone one meet you half way. There are always excuses, parents may hear, house mates may hear, but neither of these have been an issue in the past.

    I am struggling to know where to go from here. I have put 8 years into this and I am not willing to let it go. I know that long distance is tough, but we still see each other every weekend which is about the same as when he was working in the bar. I do want to marry him, but at the moment I am worried that if we cannot get things back on track I will be miserable.

    Any suggestions - other than dirty weekends away or handcuffs!


Comments

  • #2
    Keano
    Moderators, Recreation & Hobbies Moderators, Social & Fun Moderators, Sports Moderators Posts: 12,808 Mod ✭✭✭✭Keano


    Bar the lack of itimacy, how is the relationship? Yes sex does play a part of every relationship but your post sounds like you are willing to throw it all away as the sex has dried up?


  • #3
    Charles1412
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 57 ✭✭Charles1412


    Have you discussed it & come to some sort of agreement. Let him know your not happy with the situation but also mention the good points to the relationship. I ve just come out of a 9 year relationship and althought the sex was not even close to the reason we broke up I feel that the lack of intimacy (1 a moth) did not help to bond us closer and lead to some resentment on my part.


Advertisement