Pint after work?

Beetlebum

Morning Guys,

Just a quick one...there's a guy in work that I get on great with. I was thinking of asking him if he wants to go for a pint after work tonight. The sun is shining and I already know I'll want a pint after work;)

He has a girlfriend though and I don't want him to think that I'm asking him in a romantic way. I'm single however and I just don't want it to come across like I'm being flirty.

So two questions, firstly if a girl you got on great with in work asked you to go for a pint on a Friday evening would you think she liked you as more then a friend?

Also, is it inappropriate to ask a guy who has a girlfriend to go for a friendly pint?

I guess I feel a bit weird about it and I'm not sure why. If he was single I'd have no problem asking him to go!

Thanks Guys

Tattoo Stan

Bit weird just the two of you. Ask some others to go too.

prinz

Ask away. You get on great, he knows you know he has a gf, Friday evening after work. Go for it. If he reads too much into it it's his problem.

Micky Dolenz

yes to question 1
and no to question 2

Only you know the real answers. Do you fancy him?

Dardania

Micky Dolenz wrote: »

Do you fancy him?

The crux of the issue. If you don't that's fine.

Maybe ask him if he wants to bring along his gf?

Beetlebum

sunflower27 wrote: »

Hmmm. No, if I had to question whether it was OK to a k a guy with a gf to go for a pint then no I wouldnt ask him. You obviously aren't that chummy-chummy.

I worked with a lot of guys in my old job and would often go for pints with them, but then I didnt have any feelings for them or ulterior motives.

It sounds like you're implying that I do have ulterior motives or feelings for him and I don't. I just think he's sound and whenever we're talking on our break I always wish the conversation was happening over a few pints. We're both really into books, music and films and we get along great.

I don't fancy him and I would never ever be with or try it on with somebody elses boyfriend. I think that's the lowest of the low.

Anyway, he'll probably think I like him so I'll just leave it..

tbh

I think you're making the right call. A few of ye - grand. Just the two of ye - tongues will wag. I know it's crap, but there it is.

Beetlebum

sunflower27 wrote: »

Sorry OP, I misread your initial post.

Going out with a few of you would be fine... and keep the gossip-mongers at bay!

Yeah...stupid office politics!!

tbh

yeah...office politics.....plus the fact that you LOVE him :P

Beetlebum

tbh wrote: »

yeah...office politics.....plus the fact that you LOVE him :P

Sssshhhh....quiet you!!:pac:

komodosp

I don't fancy him and I would never ever be with or try it on with somebody elses boyfriend. I think that's the lowest of the low.

I see no problem with it, but his girlfriend might... No matter how much you don't fancy him it's probably not how his girlfriend will see it... You might be putting him in an awkward position where he wants to go for a pint with one of his friends but is worried about what his girlfriend will think.
That's probably why you feel wierd about it.

Having said that I used to go for pints with a girl who had a boyfriend (I'm a fella), though I was friends with the boyfriend too, he didn't really like going out for drinks, or he worked late (I worked wierd hours too, she didn't work), so often it was just me and her... I suppose it's all down to what kind of relationship they have

Silverfish

Off topic and unhelpful posting can earn you a ban from this forum.

Please keep all replies constructive and on-topic thanks.

DenMan

Why not OP. You are both workmates and it's Friday. Go for it. If you wrap it up at 5 then just ask if he'd like to go for a few pints. When I lived in Malta a girl asked me would I like to go for a drink after work. She was a friend of my gf and she didn't mind. I'd say he'd like it. I got bored going for a drink with the guys most of the time and it was a lot of fun. Go for it yourself.

Johnnnybravo

Ask a few people to go.

To be honest, the gf would probably not like some girl in work asking her fella out for drinks Friday evening as just the two of them. Getting a few heads out would be fine, asking just him depending on how pally ye are at work could be construied as more than a friendly pint.

Going with the original just asking him plan, I wouldnt want to be you if the gf is the jelly type and decides to come out and meet the friendly girl from work asking her bloke out some night.

R.D. aka MR.D

do it but only if you say explicitly invite the girlfriend along. and make sure to ask about her and be disapointed if she can't.

this way he should know you don't like him and it will also ease your mind that you don't have other motives.

but i agree with others that you might be putting him in an akward position but if you try to include the girlfriend and make this clear if she does come along then it should be fine.

Nervous Wreck

Despite what it says in the papers, men and women can indeed be friends without there being anything sexual going on. My girl mates in work ask me to go for pints all the time and vice versa. I'm single and some of them have boyfriends. No biggy, we're all mates. Drink away!

Otis Driftwood

Nervous Wreck wrote: »

Despite what it says in the papers, men and women can indeed be friends without there being anything sexual going on. My girl mates in work ask me to go for pints all the time and vice versa. I'm single and some of them have boyfriends. No biggy, we're all mates. Drink away!

Quoted for truth.

You know he has a GF and arent interested in him sexually in any case so why not?If I didnt go for pints with female colleagues when I was dating someone I would rarely have gone out at all.Its no big deal at all.