My Neighbours Cock

My name is URL

They got one to occupy their hens.

It does it's thing at 5am in these summer months. Once it gets in your ears that's it, you're deaf

I tried shouting at it but it didn't work.... What now? Should I choke it or hire a pro?

Ghost Train

move

liah

Bow & arrow. Target practice, get your aim up for the next AH beers.

ejmaztec

My name is URL wrote: »

They got one to occupy their hens.

It does it's thing at 5am in these summer months. Once it gets in your ears that's it, you're deaf

I tried shouting at it but it didn't work.... What now? Should I choke it or hire a pro?

Pullet.

brummytom

Show it a photo of Ann Widdicombe/Mary Harney.. that always seems to calm down my cock

deisedude

My name is URL wrote: »

They got one to occupy their hens.

It does it's thing at 5am in these summer months. Once it gets in your ears that's it, you're deaf

I tried shouting at it but it didn't work.... What now? Should I choke it or hire a pro?

Choke the chicken:D

AMixedBag

Ah, you got me!

fullstop

Epic thread title. Kudos OP

Tomebagel

Depends what size it is?My neighbour has one and you cant get within a 12'' radius of it.

az2wp0sye65487

I saw the name of the thread and came in thinking you'd be telling us how you were some sort of peeping tom!

Buy a fox!

ejmaztec

fullstop wrote: »

Epic thread title. Kudos OP

A lot of threads are a load of old cock.

AMixedBag

Ah, you got me! Will i come over and give it an aul rattle sure? Id probably have more experience then you to be honest.

Insect Overlord

Deleted User wrote: »

Buy a fox!

Then see which one you can toss further.

admiralofthefleet

My name is URL wrote: »

They got one to occupy their hens.

It does it's thing at 5am in these summer months. Once it gets in your ears that's it, you're deaf

I tried shouting at it but it didn't work.... What now? Should I choke it or hire a pro?

be careful, you dont want cock rot

4zn76tysfajdxp

Start calling it a rooster. I don't know if you're aware OP, but the thread title as it is is somewhat misleading.

Lockstep

A not so subtle play on words.

Couldn't really expect much else from My_name_is_url

brummytom

Chaya Fierce Sinus wrote: »

peeping tom!

You called?

Agamemnon

My name is URL wrote: »

Once it gets in your ears that's it, you're deaf

If your neighbour's cock is small enough to fit in your ear it can't be that much of a nuisance.

galwayrush

You're only jealous because your neighbour's cock is up before your's in the mornings.;)

ejmaztec

galwayrush wrote: »

You're only jealous because your neighbour's cock is up before your's in the mornings.;)

That's a fowl thing to say.

Vain

Give the cock a bashing.

itsallaboutheL

ejmaztec wrote: »

Pullet.

Lads will ye thank the man for gods sake!!! thats the greatest pun ever!!

In All Fairness

Deleted User wrote: »

Buy a fox!

Jaysus! Between the fox tossing and the chicken choking he'll nearly sleep through it. But tell us this OP, what sort of people are your neighbours that they haven't killed it themselves. Are there neighbours on the other side too? Would a joint offensive with ghettoblasters do any good?

phasers

itsallaboutheL wrote: »

Lads will ye thank the man for gods sake!!! thats the greatest pun ever!!

I don't get it...


report them to the gardaí for running a cockfighting ring in their garden

InkSlinger67

Step up URL!!! There's nothing worse than procrastinating about something that annoys you and not doing something about it!

Recently I took action on something that regularly annoyed me. Now I've taken care of that thing I feel much better and Barry Scott's corpse is in my bath dissolving in Cillit Bang!

Success! :pac:

phasers

InkSlinger67 wrote: »

Step up URL!!! There's nothing worse than procrastinating about something that annoys you and not doing something about it!

Recently I took action on something that regularly annoyed me. Now I've taken care of that thing I feel much better and Barry Scott's corpse is in my bath dissolving in Cillit Bang!

Success! :pac:

You got Billy Mays stupid, the greatest pitchman of all time!

In All Fairness

In All Fairness wrote: »

Jaysus! Between the fox tossing and the chicken choking he'll nearly sleep through it. But tell us this OP, what sort of people are your neighbours that they haven't killed it themselves. Are there neighbours on the other side too? Would a joint offensive with ghettoblasters do any good?

Connect up a very loudamp to a mic in the chicken run and use a delay loop, every "cock-adoodle-doo" will be repeated by a "cock-adoodle-doo" It'll soon shut up as it'll be scared that this bigger rival will do it one!

Super-Rush

I'll see your cock and raise you

K-9

My name is URL wrote: »

What now? Should I choke it or hire a pro?

Too chicken?

*gets coat.

Insect Overlord

super-rush wrote: »

I'll see your cock and raise you

It ain't big enough

Super-Rush

An File wrote: »

It ain't big enough

Story of my life

samantha2000

Dammit, you are talking about the feathered kind? I'm outta' here.

Super-Rush

samantha2000 wrote: »

Dammit, you are talking about the feathered kind? I'm outta' here.

PM sent

deisedude

samantha2000 wrote: »

Dammit, you are talking about the feathered kind? I'm outta' here.

Theres another kind?:eek:

*looks down worrying

Seraphicblue

super-rush wrote: »

PM sent

well if ye're going to flock together.......

Sharpshooter

This was a cock and bull thread, apart from " Pullet "