Seperation - Advice Needed

Charles1412

My wife recently informed me that she wants to end our marriage after 5 years. We own our home ( AIB Mortgage) and have no children and I am just looking for some advice as what step to take next. We are trying to seperate as amicably as possible & I would greatly appreciate any advice

Stheno

If it's a fairly amicable split, then I'd suggest you both consider mediation, which is a free service offered by the Dept. of Social and Family affairs.

Mediation will enable you both to come to an agreement as to how you want to deal with any areas you need to resolve (house, succession rights etc) and once the agreement has been drawn up, then it can/will be sent to your solicitors to draw up a seperation agreement.

More information on mediation and how to contact them is here


There is a waiting list but it's a service that is well worth using imo.
Best of luck

Charles1412

Thanks for the advice; it looked like were were going to settle things amicably and my wife wanted me to buy her out of the house based on the current market value of the house( estimated from the selling price of a neighbours house) I have offered her a payment equal to half the equity however she is looking for roughly twice this or the total equity and I can see things getting sticky. My biggest problem s that I have been unemployed since late last year and when I approached the bank t take over the mortgage they are looking for payslips etc. I am really looking for advice re. options open to me with the house as I dont want to loose it and have enough money to cover 1 years payments and I am starting a new job next week. An advice greatly appreciated

SarahSassy

Why is she looking for all the equity... Am not sure she will be all amicable... Start to protect yourself. Wait for a few months til you have the 6 months payslips required by the Bank. Chances are the value will have gone down further so you may have to pay less.

Start dividing your bank accounts now and organising to split the bills... Dont be mean but be wise.

LegacyUser

Her offer is just a starting point. Are you both still living in the house?

Toots

Sorry to hear that OP.

Mediation is a good idea, also if you haven't already consulted a solicitor, I'd suggest you find one asap, just in case things do get sticky. Either way, the solicitor would be able to give you a better idea of where you stand as regards the house. I think if it's the case that you can't afford to take over the mortgage, then another option given to you would be to sell the house, clear the remaining mortgage, and split any remaining leftover proceeds 50/50. A relative of mine is going through a divorce at the moment, and she couldn't afford to buy her husband out, and he was moving in with someone else so didn't want to take over the mortgage and have the house, so this was the solution that they were given.

Stheno

Charles1412 wrote: »

Thanks for the advice; it looked like were were going to settle things amicably and my wife wanted me to buy her out of the house based on the current market value of the house( estimated from the selling price of a neighbours house) I have offered her a payment equal to half the equity however she is looking for roughly twice this or the total equity and I can see things getting sticky. My biggest problem s that I have been unemployed since late last year and when I approached the bank t take over the mortgage they are looking for payslips etc. I am really looking for advice re. options open to me with the house as I dont want to loose it and have enough money to cover 1 years payments and I am starting a new job next week. An advice greatly appreciated

This is potentially where mediation will help you, part of the process is listing out all of your current joint assets and liabilities, working out a budget based on your individual means, and then agreeing how to dispose of the joint assets/liabilities and who will be responsible for what.

Assets can include such items as pension plans, savings etc.

If one of you is not working and the other is, the issue of spousal maintenance may come up also.

Mediators will advise that you get three valuations from surveyors and average them out to best estimate the value of your home.

There are other options than just one buying out the other, or selling the house which they will faciliatate discussion around.

As regards the equity and the mortgage, the bank imo will not currently loan to most people who are working, so being unemployed is unlikely to positively influence their giving you a mortgage bigger than the one you currently share with your wife.