I hit My Wife Today

Tom25

I hit my girlfriend today.. wow I feel like such ****. I guess im gonna get picked up by Guards tomorrow, so I figured I would tell you what happend.

We were having an argument and she went too far. She made a comment along the lines of "your loser father couldn't keep a relationship together and you can't either!". When I was around 11, my parents got divorced and fought for custody. My dad wanted me and my brother because he genuinely loved us. My mom wanted us just to spite my dad. She won, and my dad kinda lost it over the decades.

This was too far for me. I had never, EVER hit a girl before, but it happened so fast I didn't even know I did it.

Basically, I cocked my fist back, and flew it straight into her nose. I thought it would be like the movies where she would get a little trickle of blood. It wasn't. Her nose EXPLODED. I think I must of broken a bunch of cartilege or something because blood shot out of both her nostrils, got all over me, got all over the floor.

She staggered backwards, hit her head hard enough on the wall to leave a dent, and slumped down.

We were both stunned for about 10 seconds before she started crying hysterically and ran into my room and locked the door. So I went to wash my hands, and while I was in the bathroom I heard her run out of the house and take off in her car. That was about 5 hours ago so I guess she didn't go the cops or anything. So later I went home and broke down in tears..

My mom came in the room and when she heard about the story she got scared and said your moving with your auntie and uncle in bel air. I whistled for a cab and when it came near the license plate said fresh and had dice in the mirror if anything i can say that this cab was rare but i thought " yo homes to bel air!" I pulled up to a house at about over 9000 or 8 and I yelled to the cab yo homes smell ya later, looked at my kingdom I was finally there, to sit on my thrown as the prince of bel air.

uberwolf

you misspelt throne

brendansmith

uberwolf wrote: »

you misspelt throne

Agreed!

brummytom

Well that was worth reading

kippy

****,
You must be really bored. You should get out more.

NewFrockTuesday

And it should be Bel Air - capitals are important.

Nick_oliveri

Cool story bro.

jaffa20

You hit your girlfriend and your wife?

67AQUALUNG

copy pasta is delicious! NYOM NYOM

Tom25

cool story /b/ro

jaffa20

Nick_oliveri wrote: »

Cool story bro.

67AQUALUNG wrote: »

Cool story bro!

Hmmm

Rented Mule

If only there was a forum to discuss our Personal Issues.

Blazer

or a sh1t forum for sh1t threads? :pac:

67AQUALUNG

rule 22 and rule 23 is applied in this thread.

CR 7

Rented Mule wrote: »

If only there was a forum to discuss our Personal Issues.

If only there was some form of moderation machines to decide such matters. If only one had the patience to read more than one line. If only life wasn't so full of musings.......

Mossy Monk

I was about to congratulate you but then saw you were taking the piss.

johnny_knoxvile

Dont beat yourself up over it dude.

Valmont

Well at least it was different.

minxie

Someone should give you a dig

AlkalineAcid

rule 22 and rule 23 is applied in this thread.

GhostInTheRuins

So many holes in your story I don't know where to begin.

thealltimelow

what was this all about ?

AlkalineAcid

Don't feed the trolls.

T-K-O

What a ****ing tool.

Maddison

Come here so I can smack you.........

johnny_knoxvile

AlkalineAcid wrote: »

Don't feed the trolls.

why not? Trolls need love too, this makes as much sense as describe your sex life with pokèmon moves etc etc.

Joey the lips

AlkalineAcid wrote: »

rule 22 and rule 23 is applied in this thread.

I know your dying for someone to ask cause you have said it twice! so go on what is rule 22 and rule 23

GhostInTheRuins

Joey the lips wrote: »

I know your dying for someone to ask cause you have said it twice! so go on what is rule 22 and rule 23

Rule 24: never ask what rule 22 and 23 are.

chavezychavez

And she was all like....."I get knocked down, but I get up again cos you're never gonna keep me down....."

Later on she was looking for a "whiskey drink" and then a "cider drink" to calm the nerves.

kittensoft1984

What the **** was that about??? You have way too much time on your hands OP!

Joey the lips

GhostInTheRuins wrote: »

Rule 24: never ask what rule 22 and 23 are.

Thats funny! you have changed your name! Mods, Fake! Fake!