Love

LegacyUser

How do you define it? How can you tell exactly when you are in love? When is it the right moment to say those words?

SarahSassy

Thats like asking how long a piece of string is. Its varies person to person, between couples, in different relationships etc etc etc

The Gish

Unregistered wrote: »

How do you define it? How can you tell exactly when you are in love? When is it the right moment to say those words?

Not wanting to be anywhere else with anyone else.
Knowing that every time you see that person your heart skips a beat and you get butterflies in your stomach.
Knowing you can yes to them when sometimes you want to say no but their happiness is most important to you.
Knowing that the advice you give will be taken the way that it was meant to be taken.
Being able to be yourself around them and you know they are your best friend.

There is NO right time to say these words. The words will come to you when appropriate.

You are really in love though if you like their mother. Joking of course.

Or else it just may be a sexual thing but thats called lust.

Sarah W

When they are vomiting, pale and grumpy and you still want to be with them.

The nice stuff is easy......

John Mason

If you have to ask the question, you are not in love

LegacyUser

pink fluffy bunny wrote: »

If you have to ask the question, you are not in love

OP here.

Wouldn't necessarily agree with that to be honest. I'm just curious to see what others regard as 'being in love'. I've often seen that type of response to questions on these forums and I don't think it really fits in here.

John Mason

its different for everyone and you are the only person who can decide if you are in love or not

some people have notions of seeing stars and butterflies when their seen their OH

other people because they both have the same passion for computer games.

other people because they can watch soaps together or they once met when were 5 or something

personally i realised when i had spent a while with my OH and didnt want to bash his head in with a frying pan everytime i saw him

No one can answer this question for you except you

LegacyUser

When they are your world, you can barely think of anyone else, you want to spend the rest of your life with them, you can deal with their bad bits and love them for who they are, when you clean up their sick without a second thought...loads of stuff!

tman

Yep... Can be totally different for different people.
For me it was when I saw a couple in their 60s who were obviously still madly in love, and both had that twinkle in their eyes. The way they carried on reminded me of the way I act around my lady, and I found myself thinking "I hope that we're still like that at their age"
It just clicked then... Before that point I had never been able to imagine myself being with someone for more than a year or two into the future, but could now clearly picture myself with the same person 30 years down the line...

(I had said "I think I love you" before then, but was 100% sure from then on in)

Mozart1986

You never know & thats the point. It isn't an emotion although it carries a whole range of emotions; It isn't an action although it carries a whole variety of complimentary actions; It isn't a decision although a whole load of weighty decisions are founded upon it. For me its mostly a promise, when issued as an assertion. That is not necessary though. You don't have to say "I love you" for two adults to be fully in love and know it. In an adult relationship it can be taken totally for granted. We don't need to be melodramatic Americans who make this divine promise tritely and cheaply. The reason I say it is a promise is because your emotions, deads, decisions, etc should be enough, and in real loving relationships they are enough. I think this generation is a generation of narcistic, melodramatic hedons spouting cheap words and having cheaper sex. That is my personal opinion. You never "know" but if you make that promise too early you can hurt someone so don't be a b*****d and be sure they're the one.

Things can go wrong in loving relationships also but then the disappointment is mutual and unfortunate. If you "fall out of love" that is just an excuse for taking advantage of someone. Then that person has failed to fulfill his/her promise for whatever reason.

These are high standards but if they weren't accurate then love wouldn't be the powerful force that it is.

CathyMoran

For me it was when I got the worst news of my life so far and I wanted to give him a hug and knew that he would be there for me no matter what...

Love is not all romance (though we still have that), for me it is a lot about being someone that is your best friend that you also want to have sex with, someone that you can trust who never bores you (well that was a personal thing), someone that you can be yourself with and they can be themselves with you, someone who you know will be there for the bad times as well as the good, someone that you know inside and out and while they may drive you batty at times they also make you feel on top of the world.