Does it bother you what your friends think?

LegacyUser

Hi all,
Just wondering if you started dating/seeing a guy does it bother you if your friends dont like him? now i know everyone isnt perfect and sometimes i might find faults in my mates boyfriends but i would never say it to them. Am currently seeing a guy and one of my mates said she finds him a bit "weird". It has bothered me a bit because i know he can be quiet sometimes but thats part of his personality well thats what i think.Are some people that naive to think that everyone is perfect and that no one has has faults.

prinz

So the only difference between you and your friend, is that she had the courage to tell you what she honestly thought, whereas you don't....

Everyone has faults, no one is perfect. People's opinions often change over time. How well does she know your bf for example? Often people just don't click right away until you meet them a few times, under different circumstances, and spend time together. You shouldn't let it bother you. tbh I don't really understand your issue. Are you upset because your friend found a fault...or because she told you I'd consider a couple of my mates weird.... it's not a fault per se, they just are

LegacyUser

It depends on what the person is saying about your OH. If she is just saying she thinks he's a bit weird then that is not really something that shoudl affect you and IMO she shoudlnt bother saying anything. That is just going to make you feel awkward whenever they are around eachother as you know she doesnt like him

If she thought he wasnt good for you, treated you badly etc then possibly she should mention something to you, but in a supportive way to try and help you.

My friend is going out with this guy i cannot stand, i find him possibly the most irritating person i have ever met and really dont like being around him. But he is good to her, makes her happy and treats her well so i would never dare to say anything to her about how i feel about him. It is irrelevent my personal feelings as long as the guy is treating her well, and all voicing my opinion would do would make it so that she would feel weird whenever we are around him and thats not fair on her!

I think you need to find out why she would say something like that to you, and delve a little more into what she means by "weird" and maybe reassure your friend that this guy treats you well and makes you happy and while you appreciate her opinion it isnt really relevent to how you feel about him

I'lllearnye

+1. Unless you asked for your friends opinion straight out, she should have kept her gob shut. Build your own picture of the man you're seeing. If your friend has to air her opinions again, tell her very firmly that you think he's just fine.

zxcvbnm1

prinz wrote: »

So the only difference between you and your friend, is that she had the courage to tell you what she honestly thought, whereas you don't....

what nonsense.
I'm suspecting you are quite young.

If everyone else went around telling each other what they honestly thought of each other at the drop of a hat for no constructive reason the world would break down.

It's all about tact.

There seems to have been no real reason according to the OP as to why her friend just blurted it out.
All it achieved is it seems to have upset the OP.

WHy is that courageous?

Lucy Lu

Not everyone we know or go out with will like all others we know. Thats life.

There are two ways to look at it. If its just one personal opinion, try not to worry so much about it and try and feel confident enough in your own choice of partner.

But if most/all of your friends have the same opinion maybe look deeper into why.

At the end of the day what one person thinks is weird another may see as normal.

prinz

zxcvbnm1 wrote: »

what nonsense.
I'm suspecting you are quite young.
If everyone else went around telling each other what they honestly thought of each other at the drop of a hat for no constructive reason the world would break down.

Well you suspect wrong. I suspect you've never lived on the Continent, for if you had you'd learn that the world would not break down, in fact it would be a much simpler more straightforward place, without the need for lies, covering up, bullsh*tting your way through life to appease people you don't like. That is nonsense.

zxcvbnm1

prinz wrote: »

Well you suspect wrong. I suspect you've never lived on the Continent, for if you had you'd learn that the world would not break down, in fact it would be a much simpler more straightforward place, without the need for lies, covering up, bullsh*tting your way through life to appease people you don't like. That is nonsense.

WHat you are saying makes absolutely no sense.

the OP has told us that for no apparent reason her friend told her she thinks he bf is weird.

How is it lying / bullsh1tting / covering up for the friend to decide to keep this information to herself?

DO you seriously just go around telling people unprompted that they or their friends or family memebrs might be weird ? ANd you think this is acceptabe information?

WHy would anyone do that unprompted ?
WHat is to gain in it for anyone only to upset someone like the OP has been upset in ths instance.

DO you actually seriously behave like that?

LegacyUser

Yes my friend did just blurt it out in conversation over the phone and we werent even talking about me or him which is why i found it so odd. I have always supported her in her life whenever she needed me and i would never tell her i didnt like her boyfriend so long as he treats her well. yes this guy treats me well and im happy,the happiest i have been in a long time. But im not going to let me bother me anymore everyone to their own and all that!!