Should i stay or should i go???

LegacyUser

Basically i am friends with this guy. We have been together for da last two months or more. He said from day one he wasnt into relationships and i said fair enough cause i didnt want one either. So i suppose it was a f buddy situation, Thing is i have developed serious feelings for him. At the start we were just kissing da odd time but over the last few weekends it has been every night of the weekend and i always stay over. We text and ring each other and ring each other nearly everyday. I dont really meet him during da week but i did stay over one nite last week. If i am out with friends in one place and his is with his friends in another place he will always get a taxi to meet me at da end of the night even if he is a half hour away. Since we started he hasnt kissed anybody else. I would consider him shy with his feelings when sober but when he has a few drinks he is always saying we are in trouble we like each other too much well i do anyway he says. Does this sound like a typical f buddy situation or do you reckon he does want to go out with me but he is scared?He has never gone out with anybody before..

Blue_Wolf

Well, are you happy with the way things are?

You say he's not seeing anyone else so surely you are just looking for a title than?

Would you be willing to say goodbye to him if he says he doesn't want the title?

If you are having fun the way things are and he's not seeing anyone else than leave things be. If on the other hand, you are not happy the way things are and want...more, than talk to him about it and take it from there.

LegacyUser

op here. i am happy but i want more i want to know that if he does go out and does meet somebody that he wont do anything about it. i think if he did say he doesnt want a title i would find it awful hard but i would have to cut my ties with him problem is we have a lot of mutual friends and are friends ourselves.does it sound like a typical f buddy i dont think so arent most f buddy situations no contact and generally not staying the overnight with the person?

VaioCruiser

Does he avoid introducing you to his friends ? Does he keep you away from his acquaintances ?
If so - then that is a major cause of concern and it's not an issue of a 'title'. You have to ask yourself what it is you want out of your life. Are you happy spending a chunk of your life devoted only to sex with a guy who has no desire for you as a person ? if so then all is well. If you want more, then this is not the guy for you and you should move on to find what it is you need for yourself. Sex is a great, but in my opinion it's over rated as an isolated activity.

All the best.

LegacyUser

Hi OP, It sounds like a friends with benefits situation, as opposed to a f**k buddy scenario.

My advice would be to distance yourself for a short period, that way you can tell if he misses you- if you see each other a lot, its easy to slip into a routine, but put him in a situation where you can gauge whether he misses you or not.

Also, its a controversial suggestion, but you could casually bring up a guy you like, or tell him about someone who has tried it on with you, see how he reacts. His reaction would speak volumes.

Best of luck!