Let her back in?

putock

Hey,
sorry for the long post!!
since this is a relationship advice question there's obviously a lot of backstory that would take too long to bring up on this (unless asked for) so just gonna keep it quick & to the main points.
I was going out with a girl for a year or so, been broken up the same amount now and she's trying to get in touch with me. It was a pretty much perfect relationship, both on the same wave with everything, things couldn't have been better, felt like real love-for awhile anyway.
The break up though was over her cheating on me, only went as far as kissing but it was 3 times with 3 different people, one was a guy where they used each other for sex when single and he always would try it on with her if she was single or not, another was a girl, my ex who simply put would do anything she could to ruin anything that had me happy.
There was a month or so afterwards of being upset alot, for both of us, over what could've & should've been. After this time i still wanted to reconcile but she was along the lines of 'one day' so i decided to cut ties to start getting over it & her. Every so often i would get an IM from her or a txt just sayin hey or how are you-general chit chat openings that i never replied to. But they became more frequent and she seems interested in meeting up to talk, about what i don't exactly know, i assume to be friends or maybe more or to even just clear her conscience.
Any ideas what she's up to-or suggestions of what to do next because i am stuck! Good bit of confusion is because i don't know what i want out of it exactly.
Any ideas?

Dumb

Tell her to fook roight off. Leave her. Forget her. Why would you go near the trollop again after what she's done. There's plenty more tuna in the fish shop

putock

What about the 'what cudda beens' or 'always regret not knowing'

the_dark_side

dump her like nuclear waste man... imagine you were on that Air France plane during the turbulence, after a few glasses of veno, thinking... "jeez, this is it, Im living my last few minutes... Im sorry I didnt see more girls that I liked, if only I had the balls to get off with yer wan that time she was well on for it"... dont waste your time with some silly little b*tch whos playing mind games with you. Shes probably doing alot more than snogging these guys, let me tell you

Dumb

Leave the bollix to her own devices.

Wibbs

I agree with the previous. Dumb puts it succinctly. You were being taken for a fool. Move on as fast as you can.

Taltos

Wibbs wrote: »

I agree with the previous. Dumb puts it succinctly. You were being taken for a fool. Move on as fast as you can.

+1
Don't touch her with a barge-poll.
Life is too short for harlots like that.
She is only poison and will end up ruining your life.
So continue the way you have started - continue to ignore and where possible put blocks in place - ie if on IM - block her; mobile - delete ignore or if desperate get the phone comp to block her for you.

You know it - we know it - she knows it, oh and you know it again - BAD NEWS... If it smells like a skunk and p*s**s like a skunk...

here.from.day.1

She sounds like more hassle than shes worth.

ogriofa

putock wrote: »

Every so often i would get an IM from her or a txt just sayin hey or how are you-general chit chat openings that i never replied to. But they became more frequent and she seems interested in meeting up to talk

Haya,
It smells like a case of wanting what she can't have.
I'd say to leave it.

Also, is there a chance you're interested cause you don't have anybody at the moment?

Wurly

Sorry but this was not 'real love'...

Maybe it was on your part but it certainly was not reciprocated by her. You don't treat someone you truly love badly.

Stop looking at your relationship through rose coloured glasses. This was NOT a perfect relationship.

Mate - sorry if this is cliched - but really have a look at your self respect here. Look at what you think is an acceptable form of treatment for you. You will be treated how you allow yourself to be treated.

If you are even considering letting someone back in when they cheated on you - not once, but 3!!!! times. Well - I think that speaks volumes. You need to sort that out and that's where your energy should be going. Sorting out your head to ensure you don't attract a bad egg again.

Certainly don't invest your energy on ridiculous notions of letting this girl near you again.. Deep down I would hope and presume you know you deserve better.

the_syco

putock wrote: »

one was a guy where they used each other for sex when single and he always would try it on with her if she was single or not

The f**k buddy.

putock wrote: »

my ex who simply put would do anything she could to ruin anything that had me happy.

Your ex?

=-=

Tell her to f**k off. You caught her with your ex, and with her f**k buddy, and for some reason, think it's salvageable?

lgoring21

im single :D

Xiney

lgoring21, please note that unhelpful posts are not acceptable on this forum. Please have a read of our charter before posting again, else you face being banned.

Ta.

Xiney

putock

thanks for the replies, and congrats to the single girl!

Would it really be all that bad to hear what it is she wants though? Better to have no regrets looking back at it in a few months or years time perhaps?? or just keep the head down & keep going...

Wurly

putock wrote: »

thanks for the replies, and congrats to the single girl!

Would it really be all that bad to hear what it is she wants though? Better to have no regrets looking back at it in a few months or years time perhaps?? or just keep the head down & keep going...

Yes it would be that bad. She is clearly taking the absolute p1ss out of you. If you go and meet up with her, she can mess with your head more.

Who cares what she wants?? What do YOU want?

You WILL NOT regret this in years to come. Trust me. What's to regret? Not giving the girl who cheated on you x3 the time of day? I can't see you regretting that, mate.

Why would you want to even talk to her after the way she treated you? Seriously!

Slow Motion

putock wrote: »

thanks for the replies, and congrats to the single girl!

Would it really be all that bad to hear what it is she wants though? Better to have no regrets looking back at it in a few months or years time perhaps?? or just keep the head down & keep going...

Yes it would be bad! You've moved on, stay moved on! Whatever she wants is more than likely all about her, maybe she is lonely and sees you as a possible stop gap, if you get back with her even to talk you are opening yourself up to the same crap that ended the relationship in the first place!

Henry Ford III

She's probably looking for a return of her cd's

p.s. Never go back.

lgoring21

i think ya should just walk away from her...once burnt twice shy and all that... people like her never truely change and if she has done it once...how could u trust her not to do it again?? it wood be at the back of ur mind constantly...u seem like u still care for her and maybe she knows that...is lonely now and wants a bit of company until the next fella catches her eye again....from past experience...they were an ex for a reason and those reasons usually never change...

bronte

Three times with three different people? Sorry, not a chance!

You'd be mad to go back tbh.

Wagon

Tell her to **** off. In those words.

lgoring21

Well what did you do?? Would love a follow up on these issues,did you take her back?