Help with lifestyle changes

LegacyUser

I’ve been unemployed for a few months and have done nothing with the time. I have suffered from depression and anxiety in the past but strangely unemployment hasn’t made this any worse. In fact I seem to have become so busy doing nothing that I’ve deluded myself into thinking I’m busy. I walk into the city centre almost every day, go for coffee, walk home, spend too much time on boards and other sites. And I spend the rest of my time thinking about someone I have a massive crush on. It’s ridiculous so I’ve planned a new lifestyle for myself starting on June 2nd after the bank holiday weekend.
I’ve signed up to do an intensive part time course that requires a lot of work. I plan on getting a summer reading card for the university library and going there to study almost every day as if it were a job. I have timetables printed out for 5 different places that do exercise classes and I plan on doing an exercise class a few evenings a week. I plan on eating properly and drinking 2 litres of water a day.
I am available for work by the way, before anybody gets mad at me for being a burden on the taxpayer. I have applied for loads of jobs and I do really want one because I would love to go on holidays and other things which require money. I have used savings to pay for the course so I am committed to it.
So basically I have planned the sort of lifestyle that is recommended here a lot but I’m really worried that I might find it difficult to maintain my focus on it. It involves a massive change from how I’m living at the moment and I’d really appreciate advice on how to make myself stick with it instead of getting distracted easily. I can imagine myself setting the alarm, then looking out at the rain and deciding to go back to bed, promising myself I’ll study/exercise tomorrow. Or spending the exercise class money on something else (budget is tight).
This plan is for 4 months, the whole summer basically. Even if I were to get a job I should be able to continue with it. It’s not unrealistic to work, study part time, exercise and eat properly but unemployment seems to have made me lazy. I really need this to work as I know it will improve my job prospects and my health but I don’t trust myself to see it through. I need to because I don’t have a Plan B or spare cash for another plan like this.
So how do I make sure it works?

Agent J

Hey at least you are trying something.

Being unemployed can be a very stressful experience for people. You have all the time in the world to think about not having a job. I dont envy you.

However if i might make a comment. Plan for 4 months?
Whats your plan for tomorrow? Id look at the short term daily first and take it a day at a time.

Its fine to have meduim to long term goals but if you dont keep a close eye on the day to day its easy to slip up and then you feel guilty for throwing the long term plan out the window and its hard to get back to it.

If you screw up a daily plan then you can just think "Ok i screwed today up but i can start anew tomorrow".Go easy on yourself if you mess up a bit because lets face it you will.

Just my 2cents. Best of luck with it.

Xiney

It sounds like you're on the right track - it is everything that people suggest to those who are experiencing depression.

However, it is a big plan. If you are having trouble following it due to low motivation, you should consider visiting your GP. Low motivation is a symptom of the depression, which you probably already know.

I personally was suffering from extremely low motivation last month and made a deal with myself: I would accomplish something every day and get showered and dressed before noon every day or else I would visit my GP in a week. I ended up having to visit my GP.

So don't feel bad if you have to accept help to get your new lifestyle on track. It is worth it, in the end

Soul Stretcher

Wow...I'm impressed... that sounds like a great plan !!

You are obviously comfortable with hard work - do not worry about your current motivational slump - we ALL go through them - it's a part of life - even if you had a job, there would be days when you just wouldn't want to be there...

As said above, I think you need to break your plan down into smaller bits and REWARD yourself somehow (I know money is tight.. maybe a nice bath ?) for achieving little goals...

Also try to make it fun.... what about taking up a team sport as part of your exercise regime - includes fun and socialising.... Your post sounded a bit like you were tryng to beat yourself up by forcing yourself to work really hard.... you NEED to extract some enjoyment from it - thats the only way you or any of us will stick to a regime long-term...

Good Luck - you are lightyears ahead of many others in your employment situation.....

lehcar

^^ yeah. Don't make this a punishment, keep it balanced--else you may not see it thru.

You could get free exercise if the budget stings--go for a run with a friend, 30-minute pillow fight, etc. Good plan, you'll be fine

LegacyUser

Thanks guys:

Agent J: The 4 months comes from exams at the end in exactly 4 months. I’m working on a study plan that will be something like “2 chapters a day”. I want this to work but I know from past experience of making study plans that “2 chapters a day” can quickly become “4 chapters a day” when you’ve messed up the original plan and that can become “the whole book minus anything that can be left out because you only need to answer 3 questions out of 5” the night before the exam. That’s so not what I want this time, I’m really interested in the subject and I have the time to study. I’d love to be able to turn up for the exam really prepared. I just don’t trust myself, hence asking for advice here.

Xiney: I hope you are feeling better. As you say it’s a “big plan” which is ridiculous because it’s only the equivalent of going to work every day which I should be doing anyway. Plenty of people go to the gym after long days at work. People get children out to school in the mornings before they go to work themselves. My plan is hardly difficult compared with that and I’m annoyed with myself for thinking that I mightn’t be able to manage it. I totally understand about the days when getting up and getting dressed is too difficult. I’ve taken anti-depressants in the past but never had any amazing benefit from them. I’m doing ok these days. I’m hoping that being active and healthy might help me.

Soul stretcher: I’m ok with working hard, I did work until a few months ago. But I have to do this on my own, nobody’s going to even notice, never mind give out to me if I don’t turn up at the library so it would be easy to give up. I’ll write up the study plan breaking it down into a daily plan. Study plans are usually written in 3 hour blocks. I was thinking maybe two, 2 hour study blocks in the university library which will probably be half empty so nice and quiet from this week on. Then I could go for a coffee and/or a lunchtime exercise class in between the 2 study sessions.

Lehcar: I’m not punishing myself, I’m planning to live like a busy student instead of like an unemployed person.

So how do I plan for the days when I do mess up, to make sure I get back on track quickly? I know it’ll happen sometimes.

Xiney

Don't sell yourself short - it's a lot harder to do something on your own motivation than it is to do something that you HAVE to do (ie, going to work, picking the kids up... they're externally motivated rather than internally)

So while it's not more actual work, it requires more motivation. And it might be harder. But starting something is half of completing it