Does absence really make the heart grow fonder?

metalfest · 24-05-2009 3:52pm #1

as above...

Nervous Wreck · 24-05-2009 3:58pm

Sometimes yes. Often though, absence makes the heart grow nonchalant.

LegacyUser · 24-05-2009 4:01pm

Well my boyfriend and I are having problems, not sure if we'll make it but I suggested a wee break. I've been very stressed lately and probably a crap girlfriend & he's done things to annoy me. He says he's not happy but can't put his finger on it - so I don't know what's wrong - maybe just 'cos I've been so preoccupied or was irritable and annoyed him too much.

Haven't heard his voice for 2 days and no contact at all today which is so wierd, he normally texts 1st thing in morning. I've never spent a weekend apart from him in the 6 months since we've met. We live 2 hours apart so always had the absence and fonder bit.
So yes for me it makes it grow fonder at this moment but I have to leave him alone. Miss him dreadfully & am totally miserable at this stage.

MJOR · 24-05-2009 4:06pm

it depends really on how the person feels!

LegacyUser · 24-05-2009 4:09pm

Yes it does.

Wibbs · 24-05-2009 5:33pm

How is this a relationship issue for you OP? Maybe more details would help?

Annie Bananie · 24-05-2009 5:36pm

Everybody is different, for me it does not.

kev_s88 · 24-05-2009 7:46pm

i'll be able to tell you at the end of August when my GF comes back from Italy....and im praying that the absence will make our hearts grow fonder

sarsarsar · 24-05-2009 9:18pm

Well they do say absence makes the heart grow fonder

But I've always thought on the other side of the coin, time heals all wounds??

I dunno, just something I've often thought about, they seem a contradiction to me

LegacyUser · 25-05-2009 12:10am

absolutely!...i actually read in a psychology book that people who have affairs etc find that the person their having the affair with are very desirable and they long to spend more time with them....BUT if they do finish their original relationship and start going out with the person they had an affair with, they realise that that person wasn't as desirable as they first thought!!!

Shinners23 · 25-05-2009 9:45am

I would say in some cases.............. for me I think its more.

Out of sight, out of mind

legend365 · 25-05-2009 2:09pm

In essence...

LOVE makes the heart grow fonder.

prinz · 25-05-2009 2:24pm

Unregistered wrote: »

absolutely!...i actually read in a psychology book that people who have affairs etc find that the person their having the affair with are very desirable and they long to spend more time with them....BUT if they do finish their original relationship and start going out with the person they had an affair with, they realise that that person wasn't as desirable as they first thought!!!

That has nothing to do with absence but rather the misunderstood thrill of being a cheater. Going from a doomed relationship into one which was flawed from the start is what makes the person realise their bit on the side isn't as great as first thought.

lehcar · 25-05-2009 3:01pm

Not for me. Two long-distance relationships with a lot more absense than presence only caused intense frustration and heartache. The only reason I stuck both out for years is because I was so "fond" of the women. I'll never do that again.

Now if you're talking about someone going away for a month or two, and then coming back to resume a 'normal' relationship, that's completely different.

Does absence really make the heart grow fonder?

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