Old Goat a Heretic?

Slow Motion

You decide, is he a cock tailer? Or merely an imbibing inventor?

OldGoat wrote: »

/Stands up, taps table loudly to get attention...

Patrons of Yore Mas,
Before we meet face to face tomorrow evening I must confront my inner demons and make my confession before you. It involves the imbibing of cockt...s.

/hangs head in shame

Worse still, I think we may have been party to the actual invention of the aforementioned cockt...

Woreserest of all.....we named it!

Picture the scene if you will: Mrs Goat had a gaggle of haridans over to discuss books without explosions or aliens in them, so naturally I headed to my usual stool in the usual tavern with the usual suspects. Over the course of the evening many a bottle of cider was consumed along with a few bottles of the new (to Bulmers anyway) perry. This was the moment of my shame. I mixed the apple and the pear.

After consuming more then I should have, the names for this wonderful concoction, in a series of logical leaps that only drunken men can appricate progressed as follows-
Apples & Pears ->
Stairs ->
Stairway to Heaven ->
Stairway to Oblivion ->
No it's YOUR round ya miserable skinflinty fooker...


So there it is, my shame laid bare.
Is a cider/perry mix really a cockt...?

Shall I end up sitting alone, ostrasised by one and all in that place that reminds me somewhat of a house of ill repute that I 'accidently' wandered into one memorable night.

/Sits back into the shadows of the lurkers table and awaits judgement.

Poor Uncle Tom

Ah leave the old goat alone...

always wanted to say that..:D

Tom Dunne

Let us not jump to conclusions.

Innocent until proven drunk, as we say around these parts.

Give the man a chance to defend himself.

Otherwise.....

OldGoat

Rather good idea actually!

Off with his head.
Condem him to the deepest firey pits of hell and laugh at his pleadings. Hanging is too good for him.
Hang, draw & quarter the blaggard.


Well, thats what I would have said about any other miscriant.

Slow Motion

OldGoat wrote: »

Off with his head.
Condem him to the deepest firey pits of hell and laugh at his pleadings. Hanging is too good for him.
Hang, draw & quarter the blaggard.


Well, thats what I would have said about any other miscriant.

Quiet you! The mob is speaking!

P.C.

I will have to think about this over a few beers.

Nevyn

Yuk cider.

Diabhal Beag

Lets get to the goat's milk of the problem first :pac:

Toto Wolfcastle

Let's not jump to any conclusions here. I'm sure that Old Goat was merely attempting to understand the mind of a woman better in order to make life easier for himself.

My own brother recently turned 18 and was promptly given a cocktail (a 'Fruit Salad') for this very same purpose.

OldGoat

Rather good idea actually!

janeybabe wrote: »

Let's not jump to any conclusions here. I'm sure that Old Goat was merely attempting to understand the mind of a woman better in order to make life easier for himself.

My own brother recently turned 18 and was promptly given a cocktail (a 'Fruit Salad') for this very same purpose.

Thanks for making a plausable excuse Janey but I can't use it. I'm still guilt ridden and confessional. The understanding of the workings of a wimminz minds was the furtherest thought from my head on the night. My only goal was to get pisht, rightiously ossified, ineabraiated to the point of falloverness.

The night started well enough, beery, cheesey, crispy, all the right stuff but the table conversation turned to the shiney new product behind the bar. A tasting was conviened.

Now a tasting is a serious thing. First was the removal of all previous flavours that may have been lingering in the mouth from the beer and cheesey bacon flavoured snacks things. It was decided that bottled cider was the only substance for the job. Not my personal choice but the voting was by volume and as I had just snarfled an onion bargee smuggled into the bar my vocal chords were a little strained.

It took a few bottles of cider to suitably cleanse our palates. The we started on the perry.

The rest, as they say, is very very blurred.

Blitzkrieger

I always have a cocktail down the local. When the barman sees me come in he pulls 3/4 of a pint of stout, then tops the rest up with stout a minute later....