Kinda fairly confused!!

LegacyUser

Hey guys, not sure if this belongs here or in r'ship issues, feel free to move..

Here's my situation: Going out with guy for years, first serious relationship, then a break up. Maybe it was more of a break than a break up, both of us always knew we'd end up back together, and 6 months on, we have. Delighted and happy about this, I love him with all my heart.

But while we were apart I met this other man. It was a chance meeting one night but then we discovered we had a lot in common and really clicked and started to spend more and more time together. I really started to fall for him. However with the knowledge of wanting to be back with my ex I pushed him away, even tekking his best friend I knew I'd get back with my ex, knowing it would get back.

So I went on hols, and when I cam back discovered he'd a new girlfriend. I was a bit hurt, but knew I had no right to feel hurt and thought this is great, a chance to get over him and get myself together to get back with my lovely boyfriend.

But he broke up with this girl pretty quickly, and after we met up drunk one night he confessed he'd always be mad about me. I told him I was sorry I was back with my boyfriend now. But I've been having wierd dreams about him, basically where I'm with him and things like this. I love my boyfriend so much but this guy has really got under my skin.......

Im so sorry for the long post and I know people are going to shout at me you dont love your boyfriend how could you!! But I would just like to hear if anyone has been in a similar situation, what did they do? Did they take the plunge an break off a loving r'ship to try at a new one, or did they stay safe?

Wibbs

It depends what you're asking and what you want to give yourself permission to do. It does sound like the new guy has gotten under your skin alright. What's stopping you, either leaving your current BF, or ignoring the feelings about the new guy? Is it as you said "safe" to stay with your current guy? Staying because of some idea of safety is not the best plan in fairness, though depends on circumstances. It could simply be that you miss the butterflies in the stomach excitement and the passion and itch that needs scratching that's part and parcel of new love and your largely past that with your current BF. You have to ask yourself are butterflies worth losing your current guy for? I would say not, simply because you'll lose that with the new guy too in time, but you may have lost a more compatible partner in the process of scratching that itch.