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My Poems...

  • 12-05-2009 5:46am
    #1
    CHD
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 6,956 ✭✭✭


    This one is about God.

    Who?
    Where?
    What?
    How?

    Over there?
    Ahhh..
    No..
    Maybe..

    Watching...



    I think i should maybe shorten it, i'm not sure.

    My next one i wrote about a mate, He's a big lad and has a beard. Its about his life.

    Daire, Daire.
    Big and Hairy

    Daire, Daire
    Really scary

    Daire, Daire
    Full of beans

    Daire, Daire
    Naughty Dreams

    Daire, Daire
    Big and Brave

    Daire, Daire
    In the grave.

    In stanza 5 line 2 it really sums him and his character up. Anyway please rate.

    Thanks.


Comments

  • #2
    Da Bounca
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,699 ✭✭✭Da Bounca


    Daire is good.


  • #3
    Insect Overlord
    Moderators, Social & Fun Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 30,972 Mod ✭✭✭✭Insect Overlord


    Overly simplistic for my liking, but, to quote your "love poem", each to their own.


  • #4
    CHD
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 6,956 ✭✭✭CHD


    I am in love
    With a dove
    rub a dub dub
    ice cream in a tub

    Broken heart
    sly fart
    trip to the mart
    get up for morning dart

    Breaking up
    Shouldn't give a fup
    alas i don't
    be friends i won't

    why do some verses
    in poems not rhyme
    seems quite silly
    each to there own i suppose

    Will love again
    women and men
    venus and mars
    pluto and the moon too.


  • #5
    CHD
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 6,956 ✭✭✭CHD


    I wrote this one about Diet Coke.

    Silver label, sugar free
    you are coke you can't fool me.

    Its a work in progress really.


  • #6
    Matt Holck
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 9,706 ✭✭✭Matt Holck


    carbonic acid eating enamel shells


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  • #7
    Jesus Wept
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 25,243 ✭✭✭✭Jesus Wept


    Promising, you remind me of a young a Spike Milligan.


  • #8
    CHD
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 6,956 ✭✭✭CHD


    Have been refreshing this forum every 2/3 days cause I knew people would see my work eventually.

    As we know artists make more money ages after they create their work of art. I believe I have created art here and dodged the ''ages'' bit as I am young and not in my 80's like most artists who die then scoop millions. I also know people who write are poets, but that is why you people are broke and I will soon be rich. You keep being poets, I am a artist. A artist of words that rhyme.


  • #9
    Robbyn
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 56 ✭✭Robbyn


    I really like your poetry. Well done.


  • #10
    rachel_koeman
    Closed Accounts Posts: 22 ✭rachel_koeman


    i like your poetry! its simplistic and i like that! not everything has to be complex and metaphorical ya know?!


  • #11
    Jesus Wept
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 25,243 ✭✭✭✭Jesus Wept


    rachel_koeman wrote: »
    i like your poetry! its simplistic and i like that! not everything has to be complex and metaphorical ya know?!

    I had thought that 'Full of beans' was a metaphor but now I'm looking at the poem in a new light.
    CHD wrote: »

    Daire, Daire
    Full of beans


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  • #12
    CHD
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 6,956 ✭✭✭CHD


    rachel_koeman wrote: »
    i like your poetry! its simplistic and i like that! not everything has to be complex and metaphorical ya know?!
    Thank you kind friend.


  • #13
    x PyRo
    Moderators Posts: 8,754 ✭✭✭x PyRo


    CHD wins at life, I needed no further proof but I've witnessed it.

    WINNAR.


  • #14
    DazMarz
    Closed Accounts Posts: 8,493 ✭✭✭DazMarz


    That first poem in the OP better not be about me, or I'll brain ya!!!:D:p

    But nah, I gotta say, I'm impressed with your poetic output... Never had you pegged as someone who created anything other than chaos and bluffs, tbh....:)

    Carefree....


  • #15
    CHD
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 6,956 ✭✭✭CHD


    x PyRo wrote: »
    CHD wins at life, I needed no further proof but I've witnessed it.

    WINNAR.
    Thank you Sir.

    DazMarz wrote: »
    That first poem in the OP better not be about me, or I'll brain ya!!!:D:p

    But nah, I gotta say, I'm impressed with your poetic output... Never had you pegged as someone who created anything other than chaos and bluffs, tbh....:)

    Carefree....
    Tis the other Daire. I also create themeparks in Roller Coaster Tycoon, there is alot too me that people don't know.


  • #16
    glenjamin
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,542 ✭✭✭glenjamin


    1,2,3,
    C,H,D,
    Now I know my A,B,Cs,
    Won't you come and play with me?

    Waa Laa


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