Teenage crush

Spon Farmer

hi,

my girlfriend told me the other day that my daughter's friend has a crush on me. I thought she was talking through her hat, but she explained her reasons for forming that view and then I started to notice things myself. I half think my girlfriend is crazy, and I'm imagining it too.

but I thought it might be best to tell the mother, but as my girlfriend correctly reminded me the child's parents are a couple of d***s (a major reason for the crush on my Good Lady believes - my daughter and her friend have been buddies for nearly their entire lives and the kid has spent most of that in our house). I believe the d***s' marriage to be just about done for.

my girlfriend's younger sister developed a crush on one of her teachers and acted on it causing quite a s**tstorm apparently.

my girlfriend is pretty sure its best to leave it and let the kid out grow it, but still remembers the experience her sister went through.

any ideas folks?
is it best to let it be?
anybody been through this before?

Beruthiel

Leave it be, carry on as normal and the child will get over it.
There is nothing to be done here.

r3nu4l

Just be sure not to be left alone too long in a room with her, if you are, leave the doors open and make sure you're well away from her. Don't talk to her parents about it, some folk can get very touchy on that subject and you could find the parents turning it back on you!

You could end up with remarks like: "What are you doing to encourage this? Do you like kids, ya paedo!" etc.

Micky Dolenz

What age are we talking?

Crushes are a normal part of growing up. It is not a big deal unless you make it one.
Forget about it and move on.

LegacyUser

Hi,

I agree with R3nu4l.

Most teenage crush's are harmless once the older party doesn't encourage it. However, there's a small number that could potentially be dangerous.
For example, if you were to find yourself alone with her at some point and she tried it on (or even just told you she liked you) and you dismiss it or reject her, she could start any number of viscous rumours about what "happened" between you - even though nothing DID happen. It would be HER word against yours.

Some girls (especially teenagers looking for attention) can be devious and will go to any lengths to get what they want. If they can't have it, they can be extra spiteful and twist the truth to get their own back.

Just be careful. I defo wouldn't be left alone with her. Avoid that situation at all costs (just in case!!).

Otherwise, just carry on as normal. Don't tell the parents as it could make a big deal out of nothing and also will embarass the girl (possibly even to a point where it will affect/break the friendship she has with your daughter).

Nervous Wreck

Agree with Beruthiel. Leave it be and make sure not to encourage in any way. Kids grow out of these things in a matter of weeks/months.

Queencake

It could be just that she sees you as a father figure and feels awkward about it around you.

Plus an awful lot of girls at that age act and look awkward around men.

But fair enough, she could have a crush. In the vast majority of cases they fizzle out and nothing happens. Don't encourage it - ie. no teasing of her, no hugs, no "Awh you look lovely" before the big disco etc

I wouldn't worry about her if I was you. The whole - "make sure ye aren't alone together" thing makes sense but please don't start making the girl feel even more strange around you.

If homelife is that bad for her your home may be her lil escape from it when she visits. She'd probably be mortified if she knew that ye suspected her crush.

Spon Farmer

thanks for the response people.
my actual concern was for the child's well-being, the "Poison Ivy" element was never an issue. she is a good kid. I just thought we should do something. I'll let it work itself out.
Queencake your post has put my mind at ease. her parents are idiots. more interest in talking about the damned economy than their own child. my daughter had to organize the kid's last birthday party. I guess I've always sub-consciously allowed her an escape here.
p**cks.:mad:

thanks guys.