Is she interested?

LegacyUser

I 22 like this girl 22 approx, but I'm not good at reading between the lines.

First off I asked her out, sounded good, but then the day of I got a text saying "sorry busy at work [ had some detail in it] sorry again" then the next time I saw her I asked jokingly if it was an excuse? she said it was genuine, and she stil hadn't finished [ project x ] at work.

Now, every time I see her the atmosphere is like talking to my boss... lovely day isin't it... that sort of thing... not looking at each other... I sent her a text a few days ago but got no reply.

I really like her, but I think, that she isin't into me at all I suppose I should face facts 1. canceled date 2. no reply to text... end? third time lucky? I mean yes she could be busy at work, but the overall picture is bad? should I just ask her outright "do you like me"?

LittleEve

she might be shy or nervous...i think you should ask her as it will wreck your head tip toeing around her and not knowing what the story is.. i have been in this kinda situation before where i was too shy, and i appreciated it when the guy just asked me out straight however embarassing it was! hope it works out for u!

Nervous Wreck

Unregistered wrote: »

should I just ask her outright "do you like me"?

I wouldn't do that.... But you could very easily just ask if she reckons she'd be up for that date again and gauge her reaction... If she says "Sure, we could probably eh... do that.... eh sometime....." or some such drivel, then just leave it. But if she seems really positive about the idea, suggest a night and go for it. But don't blurt out "Look, do you like me?!" Baaaaaad idea.

Wibbs

I would say nothing. Move on. The bit where you asked her jokingly or not if it was an excuse that she missed your date? Unless she was mad crazy batshít about you, that would be a turn off IMHO and if she was mad crazy batshít about you she would have turned up or turned up later if work got in the way, or rung you to chat or whatever. On the back of that don't ask her if she likes you. Again a turn off if she does and if she doesn't well it'll justify her original take on you. Move on, find better. My 2 cents anyway.

~nop~

Sounds really confusing! try and make a joke about her standing you up or the date she missed, or maybe even ask her straight out does she want to reschedule.

Sounds like you'd be better laying your cards on the table than fretting about it.

Stheno

Wibbs wrote: »

I would say nothing. Move on. The bit where you asked her jokingly or not if it was an excuse that she missed your date? Unless she was mad crazy batshít about you, that would be a turn off IMHO and if she was mad crazy batshít about you she would have turned up or turned up later if work got in the way, or rung you to chat or whatever. On the back of that don't ask her if she likes you. Again a turn off if she does and if she doesn't well it'll justify her original take on you. Move on, find better. My 2 cents anyway.

I'd agree here, I cancelled a date genuinely due to work, but then rearranged several appointments to see the person another day.

If she was interested, she'd make an effort, yes we can all get caught out by work, but we can all also make an effort.

nicegirl

If only the git I'm waiting on a reply back from a first date was as nice as you "Unregistered" I'd have no problem
Girls are strange beasts, and I am a girl myself, but don't really get on that well with them, only the really nice genuine girls. Text her again see if she is interested on going out with you. Men are chasers apparently, and to be honest us girls kind of like it, well I do anyways!
If she dosn't get back to you to organise a time for both of ye to meet, then she could be a bit of a madam.
Good luck with her, I hope she is one of the nice girls

Taltos

Unregistered wrote: »

First off I asked her out, sounded good, but then the day of I got a text saying "sorry busy at work [ had some detail in it] sorry again"

Sounds genuine

Unregistered wrote: »

the next time I saw her I asked jokingly if it was an excuse?

This might have come across as intimidating / distrustful - basically could have set off alarm bells.

Unregistered wrote: »

I sent her a text a few days ago but got no reply.
&
should I just ask her outright "do you like me"?

Quit the texts man - they are impersonal - might seem safe but can easily be miscontrued, and under no circumstances ask her that last question.

Next time you bump together just be friendly and simply ask her if she would still like to go out for that drink etc (whatever).
Just keep smiling and relaxed, but be ready for a let-down. Hopefully your relaxed attitiude & smile will help put her at her ease and remind her why she agreed the first time to meet up. If she says yes then simply reply great - when suits you best - make no reference to the prior committment at all.
If you get a negative here then time to move on.

bluecell99

Sorry OP but I think you know the answer.She is not interested.As others have said she could have made alternative plans and contacted you - if she was interested.

Move on and hopefully its a lesson learned.Personally I would be VERY WARY of someone who mentions "busy in work","Project to finish" etc.etc.Nothing is that important.Its amazing that some of these people arent millionaires or running large corporations with the hours the allegedly put in:eek:

This is complete twaddle.Unless they are busy surgeons doing life saving operations ,sometimes in the middle of the night ,then its their crass way of saying "Not interested".

Taltos

bluecell99 wrote: »

Sorry OP but I think you know the answer.She is not interested.As others have said she could have made alternative plans and contacted you - if she was interested.

Move on and hopefully its a lesson learned.Personally I would be VERY WARY of someone who mentions "busy in work","Project to finish" etc.etc.Nothing is that important.Its amazing that some of these people arent millionaires or running large corporations with the hours the allegedly put in:eek:

This is complete twaddle.Unless they are busy surgeons doing life saving operations ,sometimes in the middle of the night ,then its their crass way of saying "Not interested".

Have to disagree Bluecell99 - working for a multinational I am all too familiar with deadlines and project commitments. Regularly we need to work 60+ hrs for a few weeks - on a few occassions until 4am next day.

But who knows maybe you are right - just keep in mind that while life should come first you do still have to pay for it - hence work commitments may be valid here.

bluecell99

Taltos wrote: »

Have to disagree Bluecell99 - working for a multinational I am all too familiar with deadlines and project commitments. Regularly we need to work 60+ hrs for a few weeks - on a few occassions until 4am next day.

But who knows maybe you are right - just keep in mind that while life should come first you do still have to pay for it - hence work commitments may be valid here.

Of course some people do work like this but its a bloody pity.Deadlines and 60 hour weeks are recipes for stress and bad health.We do have to pay for life as you say but surely to god anything over 40 hours is just plain crazy.There is a reason why this is internationally established - in fact 35 hours is now considered the ideal.

I bet you the bosses are turning in their beds when you are still working at 4 am!Equally I reckon the paddy power brigade who never worked and roll out of bed at midday to put on the first bet then drop in for the first pint of the day are not suffering from stress!!!!!!!!probably not a lot of difference in their disposable income as against yours either.Think!!!

Anyway seriously off topic so delete if required.