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Afraid to say the "L" word

  • 11-05-2009 9:19am
    #1
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭


    Boyfriend told me for the first time on Friday. I feel the same way but I completely bottled it and just said ok thanks.

    Since then I've wanted to say it back but everytime I think I've worked up the courage I lose my nerv. It's only 3 little words, I've said it in relationships before but was never quite sure if I really meant it. Now I am certain but I can't say it.

    Anyone every experience this before? What it wrong with me??


Comments

  • #2
    star-pants
    Closed Accounts Posts: 13,429 ✭✭✭✭star-pants


    There's nothing wrong with you, you're just nervous to say it because obviously you mean it. And in saying it you're opening yourself up to vulnerability. But at least you know he feels the same way, he said it first and you said 'ok thanks', so he's probably still as nervous. I've never said it, I wanted to say it once but same as yourself I kinda just didn't. I was afraid of scaring the guy away or something. You have the security of knowing he feels the same for you, so if you do truely love him, just say it, even if it's whispered mid hug when he's not looking at you (if it makes you feel easier).

    Don't feel under pressure to say it just because he did either, only say it if you *want* to. We all get nervous when we open ourselves up to someone this way. Good luck :)


  • #3
    Miss Fluff
    Closed Accounts Posts: 5,673 ✭✭✭Miss Fluff


    Agreed, the poor guy is probably still nervous considering you didn't reciprocate. Don't feel pressurised, if you are not ready to say it then don't.

    You sound like you really want to though and that you do mean it so next time you see him why don't you say to him "You know what you said to me last Friday etc etc.....well I feel the same way"....a nice indirect way of saying you love him too without using the "L" word.....!:eek:

    Or do something cute and buy a packet of rolos, give him your last one and write a note with I love you too if you don't feel you can actually SAY it.;)


  • #4
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭LegacyUser


    OP here, I do feel incredibly guilty, I know if I'd said it & didn't get a reply I'd be disappointed/insecure or whatever. I want him to know that I feel the same. I'm such a chicken ****... I was physically shaking when trying to work-up the courage yesterday.


  • #5
    star-pants
    Closed Accounts Posts: 13,429 ✭✭✭✭star-pants


    You're not chicken crap hun - you're just a bit scared/nervous, it's natural. Don't think about it, let it slip out when you feel like it, whether it be mid movie or something. If you sit there thinking on it, you'll only get more nervous.

    Or Miss Fluff has some good suggestions too. Just be happy ye are both in love with each other :) that's got to be the best thing


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