Need advice please - I'm a failure

LegacyUser

I've been learning to drive for the past two years. Starting off learning I've had some bumps but over time with plenty of lessons and practise I improved. My driving instructor has told me I'm good at driving. I've practised loads and getting pretty much weekly driving lessons. Often and a lot of the time my instructor can't fault me during lessons.

I've failed my third driving test during the week, and pretty much its down to nerves.

A week or two before each test I get so nervous and stressed too.

Its all too easy for people to say to relax and I'd be fine. I've tried postive thinking going into the tests saying its only a driving test but it doesn't work. I'm fine when its the theory part of the test but when it comes to the practical part I tense up and make terrible silly mistakes. I think its down to a few things:
1. having a complete stranger sitting with me watching every move I make.
2. driving on my own during a test. With the learner driver laws I always have somebody sitting with me. Even though I'm the one driving and making the judgements theres something comforting about having somebody i know sit with me.

Has anybody been in a similar situation due to nerves and how I can overcome the nerves and the fear of the driving test. Rescue remedy doesn't work.

star-pants

I don't know if it's allowed, but is it possible to have your driving instructor or someone in the back of the car?

Would it help to get a family member of a friend to get in the car with you for a spin? Having a few different people sitting beside you, get you used to having someone else in the car. I understand the nerves, I used to make mistakes when people were sitting beside me as I felt they were watching me.

LegacyUser

I did my test 4 times passed on the fifth go. The exact same as yourself was actually told I was wasting my money on lessons. Have no real advise on the nervousness but the last time I did the test I didn't tell anyone else I was doing it so there was no pressure and no good luck wishes and this made me relax because I didn't have to tell any one if I failed.

Nervous Wreck

I learned to drive last year in my dad's car. I was really nervy as well. I could drive fine but my dad was always there to warn me of my mistakes and I just kept making them. Then I bought my own car and within a week, I'd improved ten-fold. It was weird driving solo at first but it really puts everything into your hands. After the initial fear, it's very empowering and confidence-inspiring. I'm still a 'learner' (in that I haven't taken my test yet) but I'm a very confident driver and it's totally down to driving around on my own.

Good luck.

LegacyUser

As with Nervous Wreck above I learned in my Dad's car, failed two tests from nerves and the same scary tester! Got my own little car and flew the test. However I was on my second provisional at that stage and could drive legally on my own. Can't advocate driving alone in this day and age - just not worth it. I went into my 3rd driving test with a more don't-care attitude, and more sort of determined to show the guy what I could do than be afraid of what he would tell me I couldn't do if that makes sense?

To the best of my knowledge you cannot be accompanied during your test, I did mine 2 and a half years ago and that was the case then anyway.

Honestly, nobody was such a gibbering wreck as me when I started, I used to shake out before lessons and take ages to calm down afterwards! So if I can do it anyone can. I think the idea of getting used to different people in the car is a good one - also make sure you know the routes inside out so you can drive them without having to think too much. Do you still get the sheet with the faults marked on it? If so bring that to your instructor so he can iron out any recurring problems.

I wouldn't try taking anything for nerves, it may impare your concentration and I've always found being nervous heightens my concentration in any exam I've taken. Just to reiterate - I really think my turning points were having a car I could manage and that I knew inside out, and going in with a view to teaching the examiner what I know. Go in and say hello and smile confidently, really listen and just follow the orders. And apply again immediately! All the very best

Mike 1972

For some reason most people tend to tell all their family/friends when their test is coming up usually with the result that theyre putting themselves under more pressure.

Next time you apply for a test dont tell anyone (except maybe your instructor)

Rebelheart

test&nerves wrote: »

I've been learning to drive for the past two years. Starting off learning I've had some bumps but over time with plenty of lessons and practise I improved. My driving instructor has told me I'm good at driving. I've practised loads and getting pretty much weekly driving lessons. Often and a lot of the time my instructor can't fault me during lessons.

I've failed my third driving test during the week, and pretty much its down to nerves.

A week or two before each test I get so nervous and stressed too.

Its all too easy for people to say to relax and I'd be fine. I've tried postive thinking going into the tests saying its only a driving test but it doesn't work. I'm fine when its the theory part of the test but when it comes to the practical part I tense up and make terrible silly mistakes. I think its down to a few things:
1. having a complete stranger sitting with me watching every move I make.
2. driving on my own during a test. With the learner driver laws I always have somebody sitting with me. Even though I'm the one driving and making the judgements theres something comforting about having somebody i know sit with me.

Has anybody been in a similar situation due to nerves and how I can overcome the nerves and the fear of the driving test. Rescue remedy doesn't work.

Yes, other people have been in this situation. It's not publicised much but if you ring up the Driving Test place in Ballina and explain to somebody there your situation and emphasise that it is as a result of a medical problem for which you can, presumably, get your GP to write a supportive letter, then you should be able to request that a supervisor examine you on your driving test day. He/She will do so aware of your situation and will mark you compassionately.


I hope this helps. Kindest regards.


PS: It took me four times. Cheer up; you'll be fine!

The Sweeper

Perhaps try talking as you drive? One of the things they teach in advanced driving courses is that you speak about what you're doing as you're doing it. They require you to do it in the lessons and advanced test.

So for instance "We're approaching the lights now and my light has gone orange, I'll just check my mirror and now braking, I don't feel I'm going too fast to stop so I will brake at this orange light, changing down gears, I'm just coming to a complete stop here as the light turns red, so I'll apply my handbrake while we wait for the lights to change again, and I'm moving into first gear again" - it may sound HIDEOUSLY distracting - after all, it is an advanced driving technique - but it might help you take your mind off your nerves because you will be concentrating 110% on driving.

Your own commentary may also replace your instructor's voice - so for instance, where your instructor would normally say "In 250 yards, I want you to turn left. So now, remember, first things first, check your mirrors. What speed are you doing? You'll need to start indicating early, so mirrors first, then indicator, now slow, slowing the car, just be aware of any potential hazards on the pavements and now you can turn, no coasting, change gears, good girl" etc. etc. your driving tester will only say "Can you please take the next left".

You can fill in the instructor's bit yourself by talking yourself through it. The tester should be fine with you doing this. Also don't be afraid to ask your tester questions if you're unsure - e.g. "Do you want me to take this left or the one onto Coombe Road?" - it'd be a harsh marker who'd penalise you for clarifying something.

(Jesus, I remember my driving test. I was in my instructor's tiny Renault Clio, and this tester the size of a frickin Grizzly Bear comes out to the car. He was enormous. He had to move the passenger chair all of the way back, and then stoop his head while he was sitting in the car. Scared the bejesus out of me.

Reckon the only reason I passed my test first time is I spoke to the tester. We were doing a reverse parallel park on this little side street. So I enter the street, and in the other end comes this 16-wheeler Tesco lorry, doing a home grocery delivery. Into the street behind me barrels this soccer mom in a chelsea tractor. I indicated and pulled over to let them pass me, then waited until the tesco truck had moved on - but I told my tester what I was at e.g. "I'm just going to pull in here so this lady can go about her business, and I think I need to let that Tesco lorry pass before we try parking, so I'll just wait until they've gone" - and he seemed happy that I was in control and aware, therefore didn't penalise me. He penalised me when I tried pulling away again with my handbrake on of course, but then I was an extremely nervous driver so it was sheer luck that I passed my test tbh!!)

LegacyUser

i can understand the nervousness!!!

When I passed, the hour before my test i had a lesson and I got EVERYTHING wrong. I misscalculated everything. Honestly. This really shook me up. I had sweaty palms, shaking, etc.

I took 5 minutes before my test -in the loo!- and composed myself. what you need to do is tell yourself it's not that important, okay. No matter how much you want it, the thought of failing isn't a big deal. The more you build it up, the farther you'll fall if you don't pass. And if you don't pass, you just take it again.
My advice is don't tell anyone you've booked your test. Keep it to yourself. Before your test just remind yourself this is just 35-40 minutes of your life, you know how to drive so you can do it. Take a deep breath and smile all the way through it. Show how confident you are with driving in the way you perform during your test.
I know every test is different but what kept my mind occupied away from nerves was a constant focus on checking my mirrors.
Even if you make a mistake don't give up. You may not fail for it. I went from 5th gear to 3rd gear and drifted into the other lane slightly because I couldnt find 3rd gear and I still passed!!
The driving test instructor isn't out to get you, they just want to make sure you know what you're doing on the road (which it sounds like you do) and that you're going to be a safe driver if they pass you.
You will pass, don't fret!!!!!