Is this because of her age?

thegame

i post 8 weeks ago about my breakup we were going out 5 years and she broke up with me.i did do no contact until now and i texted her to meet up for lunch next week and she said yeah she would love that and she is looking forward to it.

im 30 and she is 23,its weird cause when we went out we were always together and we were best of friends and we texted each other everyday,since we broke up she never texted me once and it seems she is having a great time without me,when she left me its like she was relieved.

is it cause she is young and immature that she doesnt care??

its annoying

easyeason3

Maybe it's because she has moved on with her life. Sounds like you should do the same.

Africa

More than likely, id say she is trying to play it cool not textin you.

Id say go and meet up for the lunch, dont be too forward or desperate sounding, and just enjoy it. Use it as an opportunity to catch up. If she asks something like 'anyone new in your life?' ask her if she really wants to know. If she says yes then id say she is still interesed. If no then you still have that air of mystery...

star-pants

I don't think it's to do with her age, I think it's down to her getting on with things.
Seems she's moving on and enjoying her life - some people find it easier to do than others in a breakup situation.
I would keep my cool at the lunch too.

ManOfMystery

thegame wrote: »

i post 8 weeks ago about my breakup we were going out 5 years and she broke up with me.i did do no contact until now and i texted her to meet up for lunch next week and she said yeah she would love that and she is looking forward to it.

im 30 and she is 23,its weird cause when we went out we were always together and we were best of friends and we texted each other everyday,since we broke up she never texted me once and it seems she is having a great time without me,when she left me its like she was relieved.

is it cause she is young and immature that she doesnt care??

its annoying

She's only 23yrs old, and has come out of a 5yr relationship - what do you expect? Of course she's going to want to let her hair down and go out and have some fun.

I don't think it would be healthy to continue texting each other every day - particularly if you have broken up - it will only prolong things and muddy the waters. When you go from a relationship to just being friends again its only natural that the amount of contact you had previously will reduce a little. In some cases, this is necessary especially if one partner still has feelings for the other.

If you're truly her friend now your first concern should be that she's happy.

ellie1

i post 8 weeks ago about my breakup we were going out 5 years and she broke up with me.i did do no contact until now and i texted her to meet up for lunch next week and she said yeah she would love that and she is looking forward to it.

Why are you meeting up with her?

im 30 and she is 23,its weird cause when we went out we were always together and we were best of friends and we texted each other everyday,since we broke up she never texted me once and it seems she is having a great time without me,when she left me its like she was relieved.

Maybe she was relieved. Maybe she has having a good time without you.

is it cause she is young and immature that she doesnt care??

Her not caring is nothing to do with her age and maturit levels. Thats like saying. Is it because your older and more mature that you cant get over her.

its annoying

Annoying it may be. I suggest you revert back to having no contact with this girl until you are over her. If this annoys you your clearly not over her.

prinz

Is it because you're actually the immature one?

She's getting on with life. Tough break after 5 years, but you have to do it too.

oldboy

are you 30 or 13 ?

its not easy breaking up. And staying in contact for the first few initial months 99.99% of the time doesn't make it any easier.

She can see it and is getting on with things. Just because you don't hear from the girl it doesn't mean she's not hurting. Get over yourself.

What do you expect ? you'll stay in touch, hold each others hands and emotionally support each other through the breakup ? grow up you both just lost 5 years, she loast 18-23. Should be the age when you're out having fun and young, the fact she's doing it now is a right, just as its yours to go out and do the same

Mimikyu

This post has been deleted.

thegame

thanks.im just getting on with my life and ill be friends with her but it wont last anyway cause when we both get into a new relationship it will fade.

but i have to think of number 1 first and thats me.

cheers

kittenkiller

Why would she text you regularly once you've broken up?
Surely if she was keeping in touch every day it would be giving you false hope of a reconciliation.

She's probably still fond of you and doesn't want to hurt your feelings, but you can't blame her for moving on with her life.
She seems to be very mature from what you've said.

seamus

She's the one who broke up with you. Yes, she was unhappy to do it, but she didn't break up with you because she wanted to be with you. So, harsh truth is that she is a bit relieved and is happy now to have her "freedom".

It's always more difficult for the person on the receiving end because it's something which you didn't choose to do so it takes a while to accept that you are stuck with this decision which was foisted upon you. The person who made the decision accepts that reality before they even tell you. It will always appear like they're having more fun than you. Because they are.

If it does help at all, that she's happy to meet up with you suggests that she broke up not because she hates you or was sick of you, but because she wanted to do the single thing. You met when she was 18 - she hasn't been able to do the all-night partying, random on-the-spot trips away and so forth without first having to check in with another half. So I would imagine her primary driver in this is freedom - self-confidence and independence. She's not texting you because the constant texting is the reason she broke up with you - she's an individual now, she doesn't need to be texting another half every hour.

But don't take that as a "we may get back together" cue. Get on with your life. Go score someone else (it really is the best medicine) and if it's meant to be, then you might hook up again a few years down the road.

thegame

seamus wrote: »

She's the one who broke up with you. Yes, she was unhappy to do it, but she didn't break up with you because she wanted to be with you. So, harsh truth is that she is a bit relieved and is happy now to have her "freedom".

It's always more difficult for the person on the receiving end because it's something which you didn't choose to do so it takes a while to accept that you are stuck with this decision which was foisted upon you. The person who made the decision accepts that reality before they even tell you. It will always appear like they're having more fun than you. Because they are.

If it does help at all, that she's happy to meet up with you suggests that she broke up not because she hates you or was sick of you, but because she wanted to do the single thing. You met when she was 18 - she hasn't been able to do the all-night partying, random on-the-spot trips away and so forth without first having to check in with another half. So I would imagine her primary driver in this is freedom - self-confidence and independence. She's not texting you because the constant texting is the reason she broke up with you - she's an individual now, she doesn't need to be texting another half every hour.

But don't take that as a "we may get back together" cue. Get on with your life. Go score someone else (it really is the best medicine) and if it's meant to be, then you might hook up again a few years down the road.

thanks mate that helped alot