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Fancying the @rse off someone else

  • 11-04-2009 12:37am
    #1
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,183 ✭✭✭


    Not a PI mods, just a general query for the AHers who are all wise in the ways of everything.

    If you are going out with someone and love them and want to be with them and yada yada yada but fancy the @rse off someone else (fancy as in physically and personality wise - the whole shebang does it for you) do you think it means there is something fundamentally wrong with the relationship or is it entirely normal?

    Do you think it always has to affect how you feel about your existing partner or is it possible for it not to at all?


Comments

  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,605 ✭✭✭Fizman


    I was just about to reply when I read your sig, and what your Nocturnal Forum tag is!! Ha ha. Brilliant stuff!


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 10,898 ✭✭✭✭seanybiker


    just cos your with someone doesnt make ya blind or ignorant to other people being sound. It will only affect your relationship if ya bang the other lack.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 21,191 ✭✭✭✭Latchy


    A brilliant observation Herr Fizman .I salute you


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,183 ✭✭✭Peared


    Fizman wrote: »
    I was just about to reply when I read your sig, and what your Nocturnal Forum tag is!! Ha ha. Brilliant stuff!

    Lolsers. Coincidence I swear.

    Actually thread is follow on from thread in the LL.

    Would be much better your way though.


  • Moderators, Education Moderators, Technology & Internet Moderators Posts: 35,160 Mod ✭✭✭✭AlmightyCushion


    Peared wrote: »
    do you think it means there is something fundamentally wrong with the relationship?

    No, it just means you have to figure out a way to get your partner to agree to a threesome.


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 37,214 ✭✭✭✭Dudess


    It's probably not the case for every relationship (there are those couples who are blindly consumed by each other - that passes though :D) but it's still completely normal in a relationship that hasn't gone off the boil - anyone who says it isn't is deluding themselves.

    There are regularly threads from girls upset that their boyfriends look at other women ("look" as in "glance") and while most responses are sensible, there's the occasional "Your boyfriend's a rat, if he loved you he wouldn't do it" gem which is utterly bad advice really.


  • Subscribers Posts: 16,714 ✭✭✭✭copacetic


    Peared wrote: »
    Not a PI mods, just a general query for the AHers who are all wise in the ways of everything.

    If you are going out with someone and love them and want to be with them and yada yada yada but fancy the @rse off someone else (fancy as in physically and personality wise - the whole shebang does it for you) do you think it means there is something fundamentally wrong with the relationship or is it entirely normal?

    Do you think it always has to affect how you feel about your existing partner or is it possible for it not to at all?

    nah, you're grand, everyone gets like that around me. try to ignore it.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 11,148 ✭✭✭✭KnifeWRENCH


    Nah I think it's normal enough. Only fancying one person for the whole rest of your life sounds stranger to me than being in a relationship and fancying someone else.

    As long as you don't act on it and cheat your OH, you should be fine. (Of course, if the OH is up for a threesome, then you're sorted! :D)


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,837 ✭✭✭S.I.R


    No, it just means you have to figure out a way to get your partner to agree to a threesome.

    or 4some...


    3's on a lovechild anyone ?


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 22,058 ✭✭✭✭Abi


    Ever hear the saying 'you can look at the menu but..' whatever. A woman probberly made that up. Or a greedy husband. Or a jealous gay man.

    Anyway. Not your issues, its theirs. Be ok with the possibility of losing before you roll the dice.

    Im sure there is a point in there somewhere. .>.>


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  • Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 4,193 ✭✭✭Turd Ferguson


    S.I.R wrote: »
    or 4some...


    3's on a lovechild anyone ?

    Second


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 22,048 ✭✭✭✭Snowie


    if you fancy the arse of her how does she sit:confused:


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,995 ✭✭✭Sofiztikated


    Suppose its better than fancying the arse of yourself. Which would pose many problems, I would imagine.

    I've been with Her Indoors for 7 years now, and yes, theres still one girl I was almost with but never panned out. I still fancy the hole of her, we got on really well, its just I met HI and started going out with her instead.

    HI knows this, and it doesn't bother her. She's the one I'm with, we're totally open with each other, I'll let her know know if I've spotted some fine young wan, and she tells me if theres some fella eyeing her up, and we have a bit of a laugh about it.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,258 ✭✭✭Numina


    Peared wrote: »
    Do you think it means there is something fundamentally wrong with the relationship or is it entirely normal?

    Physical attraction is hardwired into us. When you're in a relationship it doesn't just turn off, there's nothing we can do about it. As long as there's no serious desire to break up with your partner and attempt to start a relationship with another person, then it's all good.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,437 ✭✭✭luckylucky


    if you fancy the arse of her how does she sit:confused:

    On his face :D... he wishes;)


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 37,214 ✭✭✭✭Dudess


    Numina wrote: »
    As long as there's no serious desire to break up with your partner and attempt to start a relationship with another person, then it's all good.
    Well that can happen too and work out very well. It's obviously sh1t for the person who's being broken up with, but I'd prefer him to end it with me rather than stay with me and live a lie when he'd rather be with someone else... and possibly cheat on me with her.

    A person isn't a **** for falling so hard for another person that it causes them to lose interest in their partner - it's not something that's chosen. And it doesn't mean the person has less respect or less love for their partner.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,897 ✭✭✭Kimia


    I know it happens and I don't think there's anything wrong with it. It does make me uncomfortable as a gf though because of course you want your bf to only fancy you! But that's not realistic.

    As long as you don't cheat (including emotionally!) it's just admiring other peoples good qualities and I'm cool with that.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 844 ✭✭✭allabouteve


    Peared wrote: »
    Not a PI mods, just a general query for the AHers who are all wise in the ways of everything.

    If you are going out with someone and love them and want to be with them and yada yada yada but fancy the @rse off someone else (fancy as in physically and personality wise - the whole shebang does it for you) do you think it means there is something fundamentally wrong with the relationship or is it entirely normal?

    Do you think it always has to affect how you feel about your existing partner or is it possible for it not to at all?

    I don't think it has to affect how you feel about your significant other, you might be in a committed relationship, but it doesn't make you deaf dumb and blind to the possibilities around you.

    Acting on them would be a problem.


    Unless everyone's cool with it, and then its okay.


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