A few jokes

cHaTbOx

Two dwarfs go into a bar, where they pick up two prostitutes and take them to their separate hotel rooms.

The first dwarf, however, is unable to get an erection. His
depression is made worse by the fact that all he hears from the next room, cries of “Here I come again 1,2,3…uuh" all night long.

In the morning, the second dwarf asks the first, “How did it go?”

The first mutter "It was so embarrassing. I couldn’t get an erection.”

The second dwarf exclaimed:

"You think that’s embarrassing?.I couldn’t even get on the bed!"

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A guy stops to visit his friend who is paralysed. His friend says, "My feet are cold. Would you get me my slippers for me?"

The guy goes upstairs, and there are his friend's two gorgeous daughters. He says, "Hi, girls. Your dad sent me up here to f**k you."

The first daughter says, "That's not true." He says, "I'll prove it." He yells down the stairs, "Both of them?"
His friend yells back, "Of course, both of them."

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Three guys stayed at a skiing lodge, but there was only one room with one bed so they after a bit of a chat they decided to share it .
In the morning the one guy said " I had the dream last night that I got a hand job."
Another guy says " That's weird 'cos I had the same dream "
The other guy pops up "Lucky B**tards , I only dreamt I was skiing"

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A guy walks in to a bar and orders a dozen shots of vodka. Once he is through with them, the bartender asks, what's the occassion? Guy replies, I had my first blowjob.

'Congrats man!' says the bartender, 'Have one on the house.'
Man goes, 'No, thanks. If a dozen shots can't help me get rid of the taste, one more won't help much'

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A British colonel arrives in North Africa during world war 2. He reports to his unit and upon inspection finds a donkey outside the command tent.

"Sergeant, why is there a donkey outside this tent?" he asks.

The sergeants looks a bit sheepish and replies, "Well, sir, sometimes the men get a bit lonely, being in the desert and all. We sometimes..."

"Filth! Abomination! I don't want to hear about it!!!" shouts the colonel in disgust. He then storms away.

Three very long weeks later, the colonel approaches the sergeant. "Sergeant will you bring the donkey around and place a crate behind it?"

"Yes, sir!" The sergeant brings the donkey around, places a crate behind it, and watches as the colonel steps onto the crate and lowers his pants.

"Sergeant, is this how the men do it?" asks the colonel.

"No, sir, the men usually ride it into town!"

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There are 3 blonds walking along and they spot some tracks.

The first one syas, "oh, I womnder if they're rabbit tracks"

The second one says, "I wonder if they're deer tracks."

And the third one gets hit by a train!

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Podge2k7

Good stuff.!:D