My name is Armin and I'm a Soberoholic...

Armin_Tamzarian

Hello...
My name is Armin and I'm a Soberoholic...

I guess it was in my second year of college that I first noticed
that I had a problem.
Up until then I'd felt pretty normal.
Weekends consisted of getting steaming drunk, puking, falling over,
fighting and waking up in a cell.
Life was good...

All of a sudden I started to feel that boozing just wasn't enough,
that I needed something stronger.

At first it wasn't that big a deal, I'd go sober the odd weekend.
I'd pretend to be sick or busy with work,
and nobody suspected what I was up to.

Soon, that wasn't enough.
I'd spend a month at a time sober.
People were starting to suspect, this is when the lies started.
Friends in college would ask "what's wrong with you, you never drink".
"Oh", I'd say, "sure I'm always on the lash
when I go home at the weekends".
Then when I'd go home, I'd tell my friends that I'd been
"on the lash all week in college".

To be honest, the signs were all there if friends and family
had bothered to look.
My bank balance kept going up.
I looked alot fitter and healthier.
I was passing all my exams in college
and worst of all, I hadn't had gotten in trouble in months,
not so much as an arrest for drunk and disorderly.

At family fuctions I'd make my excuses and slip away early, to be sober.
Relatives would ask my mother, "where's Armin"?
She'd ashamedly look at the floor and reply
"Armin's,,, gone home, he's not drinking,
it's just a phase he's going through, he'll get over it".
"But why?", they'd reply, "is he ill", "what's the matter with him?",
they'd ask as she'd break down in tears.

Months turned into years...
At this point I was completely out of control.
I was entering marathons, I'd gone out and bought a new car,
I'd even started waking up beside good looking women.
Worse was to come.
One morning I woke up to discover.....I,,,I'd gotten a mortgage and now owned a house.

Yeah, this sober lifestyle had completely taken me over,
there was no telling where it would end.

Things were really starting to degenerate.
By now I'd built up a web of lies to hide my problem from my friends.
On the surface I was going out to Niteclubs
and drinking but I hid a shocking truth.
Every chance I got I'd sneak off to the toilets and lock myself into
a cubicle.
Then, to satisfy my habit I'd flush the drink down the toilet.

I'd gotten sloppy though and one time I didn't lock the door properly.
My friend opened it and caught me there,
with the drink over the bowl - mid pour.
The look of shock on his face said it all.
He just shook his head in disgust, called me a 'drink dodger'
and walked off.
I shamefully walked back out to my friends,
they were all stood there looking at me accusingly.
Apparantly they'd assumed that the reason for my
frequent trips to the toilets was some harmless cocaine problem,
they had no idea how low I'd really sunk though.

I knew then that it was time to do something about my problem.
I marched straight up to that bar and ordered Vodka after Vodka,
downing them all in one go.
In the following weeks I started to reclaim my life and restore some normality.

The weekends passed by in drunken blurs.
Once again I'd wake up with zero recollection of the night before.
I resumed missing Mondays at work.
Got that bank balance back into a healty overdrawn position.
After a few months I'd even gotten my old red face and gut back.
Times were good.

I'm still stuck with the house though, but I'm working on it.
Norm, the accountant who drinks at my local,
has advised me that now is a great time to sell,
so I'm going to get rid of it as soon as possible.
I mean, who needs a mortgage to be worrying about
when you're out on the lash with the lads?

I guess I'm just lucky that I got my act together when I still had a chance.
From time to time I still get the old urges though.
Those inexplixable hankerings for money, dignity and health.

Don't worry, those mistakes are in the past.
I'll never go down the shameful road of Sobriety again.

I hope my story can be an inspiration, to anyone else out there
who's gotten lured into a life of Sobriety.

candlegrease

You write that? Enjoyable stuff!

FearDark

Thats very clever, my hangover is killing me all day, I wish I was a soberholic!

Armin_Tamzarian

candlegrease wrote: »

You write that? Enjoyable stuff!

Thanks, glad I didn't get a FAIL...

FlutterinBantam

:eek:

What a real fun guy:cool:

Gummy Panda

I liked it.

Well done OP

mikemac

Very well written Armin

m5ex9oqjawdg2i

Ha, nice read mate...

banshee_bones

nice one op!!! after the gruelling all day-and evening and night hangover i had on thursday i wish i was a soberaholic!!

My name is URL

Cool story, bro

Abi

Füuuucked uuup.

Interesting read all the same. Id like to say I did the opposite out of some brilliant insight, but nah.

I got hit by a postal operative on his bike during the Tiger, and made a mint foar just being pissed.

I can throw an under offer on your pile of bricks though. 60K should call the dogs off. Till you get off the island, that is.

Professey Chin

Bored today eh?

definately stealing that.. great read.

Horsefumbler

Sounds like all you really needed to do was learn to drink properly. Not everyone who drinks gets arrested/collapses. Good read though.

Abi

Horsefumbler wrote: »

Sounds like all you really needed to do was learn to drink properly. Not everyone who drinks gets arrested/collapses. Good read though.

The lies.

One mustnt trust those that what fumble with orses, neither.

brayblue24

3rd time reading that OP. Great read. Well done.

Actually you might be on to something. With Tuesday coming up maybe now is the time to think strongly and to enter your world of "misery"!

Captain-America

I didn't read your post OP,, but i have to say, I'm pissed right now.! And I have a big glass of milk in front of me, hopefully it'll sober me up a bit.

Armin tamzariwn was in the Simpsons if I recall.

Vain

You should take up writing greeting cards, Was a good read.

Abi

Captain-America wrote: »

I didn't read your post OP,, but i have to say, I'm pissed right now.! And I have a big glass of milk in front of me, hopefully it'll sober me up a bit.

Armin tamzariwn was in the Simpsons if I recall.

Ye. Go back to start =>

Epic Tissue

Armin_Tamzarian wrote: »

Hello...
My name is Armin and I'm a Soberoholic...

I guess it was in my second year of college that I first noticed
that I had a problem.
Up until then I'd felt pretty normal.
Weekends consisted of getting steaming drunk, puking, falling over,
fighting and waking up in a cell.
Life was good...

All of a sudden I started to feel that boozing just wasn't enough,
that I needed something stronger.

At first it wasn't that big a deal, I'd go sober the odd weekend.
I'd pretend to be sick or busy with work,
and nobody suspected what I was up to.

Soon, that wasn't enough.
I'd spend a month at a time sober.
People were starting to suspect, this is when the lies started.
Friends in college would ask "what's wrong with you, you never drink".
"Oh", I'd say, "sure I'm always on the lash
when I go home at the weekends".
Then when I'd go home, I'd tell my friends that I'd been
"on the lash all week in college".

To be honest, the signs were all there if friends and family
had bothered to look.
My bank balance kept going up.
I looked alot fitter and healthier.
I was passing all my exams in college
and worst of all, I hadn't had gotten in trouble in months,
not so much as an arrest for drunk and disorderly.

At family fuctions I'd make my excuses and slip away early, to be sober.
Relatives would ask my mother, "where's Armin"?
She'd ashamedly look at the floor and reply
"Armin's,,, gone home, he's not drinking,
it's just a phase he's going through, he'll get over it".
"But why?", they'd reply, "is he ill", "what's the matter with him?",
they'd ask as she'd break down in tears.

Months turned into years...
At this point I was completely out of control.
I was entering marathons, I'd gone out and bought a new car,
I'd even started waking up beside good looking women.
Worse was to come.
One morning I woke up to discover.....I,,,I'd gotten a mortgage and now owned a house.

Yeah, this sober lifestyle had completely taken me over,
there was no telling where it would end.

Things were really starting to degenerate.
By now I'd built up a web of lies to hide my problem from my friends.
On the surface I was going out to Niteclubs
and drinking but I hid a shocking truth.
Every chance I got I'd sneak off to the toilets and lock myself into
a cubicle.
Then, to satisfy my habit I'd flush the drink down the toilet.

I'd gotten sloppy though and one time I didn't lock the door properly.
My friend opened it and caught me there,
with the drink over the bowl - mid pour.
The look of shock on his face said it all.
He just shook his head in disgust, called me a 'drink dodger'
and walked off.
I shamefully walked back out to my friends,
they were all stood there looking at me accusingly.
Apparantly they'd assumed that the reason for my
frequent trips to the toilets was some harmless cocaine problem,
they had no idea how low I'd really sunk though.

I knew then that it was time to do something about my problem.
I marched straight up to that bar and ordered Vodka after Vodka,
downing them all in one go.
In the following weeks I started to reclaim my life and restore some normality.

The weekends passed by in drunken blurs.
Once again I'd wake up with zero recollection of the night before.
I resumed missing Mondays at work.
Got that bank balance back into a healty overdrawn position.
After a few months I'd even gotten my old red face and gut back.
Times were good.

I'm still stuck with the house though, but I'm working on it.
Norm, the accountant who drinks at my local,
has advised me that now is a great time to sell,
so I'm going to get rid of it as soon as possible.
I mean, who needs a mortgage to be worrying about
when you're out on the lash with the lads?

I guess I'm just lucky that I got my act together when I still had a chance.
From time to time I still get the old urges though.
Those inexplixable hankerings for money, dignity and health.

Don't worry, those mistakes are in the past.
I'll never go down the shameful road of Sobriety again.

I hope my story can be an inspiration, to anyone else out there
who's gotten lured into a life of Sobriety.

Let that be a lesson to you

Soby

Captain-America wrote: »

I didn't read your post OP,, but i have to say, I'm pissed right now.! And I have a big glass of milk in front of me, hopefully it'll sober me up a bit.

Armin tamzariwn was in the Simpsons if I recall.

If your anything like me that wont be inside ya for long

Armin_Tamzarian

Abigayle wrote: »

I can throw an under offer on your pile of bricks though. 60K should call the dogs off. Till you get off the island, that is.

Cash???

Ultimate Chin wrote: »

Bored today eh?

Immensely.

Deleted User wrote: »

definately stealing that.. great read.

Plagerise away my friend, plagerise away.

Horsefumbler wrote: »

Sounds like all you really needed to do was learn to drink properly. Not everyone who drinks gets arrested/collapses. Good read though.

Oh I'm sorry, 'He Who Tampers With Horses'...
Sounds like it's you that needs to learn how to drink properly.
If you're drinking sessions aren't ending in arrest or serious injury
to yourself or others then it sounds like you really aren't putting enough effort in.
You may want to try some new techniques,
such as drinking on an empty stomach,
or maybe you need to start mixing your drinks more

Captain-America wrote: »

Armin tamzariwn was in the Simpsons if I recall.

No but Armin Tamzarian was.

Queen-Mise

Really enjoyed reading that, thank you for sharing it with us.

Mr.Lizard

Good read. Glad to hear you're back off the wagon again. Nothing worse than people in this country who believe they can lead an enjoyable life without getting drunk all the time.

RHRN

Nice one Armin, loved it!

portomar

Mr.Lizard wrote: »

Good read. Glad to hear you're back off the wagon again. Nothing worse than people in this country who believe they can lead an enjoyable life without getting drunk all the time.

I loled!

great read OP

''To alcohol, the source of, and soultion to, all of life's problems''



one of the most on the ball simpsons quotes ever....sigh....if only we had sane licensing laws we could all be gettin pissed round the clock*

i hope to christ you never struggled with an addiction to not taking recreational drugs too!?

*i live in Sydney right now so can do just that at the moment

Armin_Tamzarian

Vain wrote: »

You should take up writing greeting cards, Was a good read.

Thanks but what sort of greeting cards do you buy?

'CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR ALCOHOLISM'?

winston82

Wp, nice read. Especially on a monday evening. Cheered me up somewhat.

candlegrease

Is this based on your actual opinions?

Vain

Armin_Tamzarian wrote: »

Thanks but what sort of greeting cards do you buy?

'CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR ALCOHLISM'?

Ya find them good for 18 and 21st partys.

Armin_Tamzarian

candlegrease wrote: »

Is this based on your actual opinions?

What opinions?

This is just the simple and sorry tale of one man's continuing battle
against Sobriety...

old boy

blench blurph shakely raises a glass,i cannot speak as my tounge is raw and burning i feel no pain

Abi

Armin_Tamzarian wrote: »

Thanks but what sort of greeting cards do you buy?

'CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR ALCOHLISM'?

Well, they've cards for everything else.

Dont advise you invest in it though. Or is the above a typo?

Fück it. I will buy one from you and send it to myself.

Armin_Tamzarian

Abigayle wrote: »

Well, they've cards for everything else.

Dont advise you invest in it though. Or is the above a typo?

Fück it. I will buy one from you and send it to myself.

Aren't you a strange one...

Thanks for pointing that out, post now corrected.
My alcohol levels were slightly down when I made that post,
which must have adversely affected my typing skills.

Local-womanizer

Great read,I have been sober for awhile now.That post makes me want to go back on the drink,in a good way though!

As they say "If Friday night ends before Sunday Morning starts your not doing it right!"

Abi

Armin_Tamzarian wrote: »

Aren't you a strange one...

Ooh very.

My alcohol levels were slightly down when I made that post,
which must have adversely affected my typing skills.

It happens, dont sweat it man. Just be more careful in future or there will be talk. Before you know it every biddy will be dropping by with alco-hampers and getting the parish priest to give you a special mention.

Im here for you dude.

/out of character over emotional hug

Armin_Tamzarian

Local-womanizer wrote: »

Great read,I have been sober for awhile now.That post makes me want to go back on the drink,in a good way though!

As they say "If Friday night ends before Sunday Morning starts your not doing it right!"

First of all, how could you ever want to go back on the drink in a 'bad way'?

Don't worry my friend, there are people out there who can help
you get rid of this terrible affliction.
With their help you'll be back on your barstool, Pint in hand, in no time.

atomicblonde

hah, hah, my mate mailed me this link, it's so funny, I never heard of board before.

Where is this from, Cheers? Norm the accountent?

I like thsi bit the best

Apparantly they'd assumed that the reason for my
frequent trips to the toilets was some harmless cocaine problem,
they had no idea how low I'd really sunk though.

What does thanks from mean?

Armin_Tamzarian

atomicblonde wrote: »

Where is this from, Cheers? Norm the accountent?

Sorry, I can't say that I've ever heard of this 'Cheers' place to which you refer.

Norm's just one of the guys who drinks in my local.
It's a great place, th sort of place where everybody knows your name.

There's Norm with all his sound financial advice, Cliff the wordly postman,
Carla the sassy barmaid and of course my best friend,
the eminent Psychiatrist Robert Terwilliger...

atomicblonde wrote: »

What does thanks from mean?

When you click on the 'Thumbs Up' icon on the bottom right of a post
you add 'Thanks From' to the post.

This is a means of showing your appreciation for a post that you find
informative, clever, witty, etc.

atomicblonde

Thanks, I get it now.

brennaldo

very good read, very enjoyable

Fago!

Armin_Tamzarian wrote: »

Hello...
My name is Armin and I'm a Soberoholic...

I guess it was in my second year of college that I first noticed
that I had a problem.
Up until then I'd felt pretty normal.
Weekends consisted of getting steaming drunk, puking, falling over,
fighting and waking up in a cell.
Life was good...

All of a sudden I started to feel that boozing just wasn't enough,
that I needed something stronger.

At first it wasn't that big a deal, I'd go sober the odd weekend.
I'd pretend to be sick or busy with work,
and nobody suspected what I was up to.

Soon, that wasn't enough.
I'd spend a month at a time sober.
People were starting to suspect, this is when the lies started.
Friends in college would ask "what's wrong with you, you never drink".
"Oh", I'd say, "sure I'm always on the lash
when I go home at the weekends".
Then when I'd go home, I'd tell my friends that I'd been
"on the lash all week in college".

To be honest, the signs were all there if friends and family
had bothered to look.
My bank balance kept going up.
I looked alot fitter and healthier.
I was passing all my exams in college
and worst of all, I hadn't had gotten in trouble in months,
not so much as an arrest for drunk and disorderly.

At family fuctions I'd make my excuses and slip away early, to be sober.
Relatives would ask my mother, "where's Armin"?
She'd ashamedly look at the floor and reply
"Armin's,,, gone home, he's not drinking,
it's just a phase he's going through, he'll get over it".
"But why?", they'd reply, "is he ill", "what's the matter with him?",
they'd ask as she'd break down in tears.

Months turned into years...
At this point I was completely out of control.
I was entering marathons, I'd gone out and bought a new car,
I'd even started waking up beside good looking women.
Worse was to come.
One morning I woke up to discover.....I,,,I'd gotten a mortgage and now owned a house.

Yeah, this sober lifestyle had completely taken me over,
there was no telling where it would end.

Things were really starting to degenerate.
By now I'd built up a web of lies to hide my problem from my friends.
On the surface I was going out to Niteclubs
and drinking but I hid a shocking truth.
Every chance I got I'd sneak off to the toilets and lock myself into
a cubicle.
Then, to satisfy my habit I'd flush the drink down the toilet.

I'd gotten sloppy though and one time I didn't lock the door properly.
My friend opened it and caught me there,
with the drink over the bowl - mid pour.
The look of shock on his face said it all.
He just shook his head in disgust, called me a 'drink dodger'
and walked off.
I shamefully walked back out to my friends,
they were all stood there looking at me accusingly.
Apparantly they'd assumed that the reason for my
frequent trips to the toilets was some harmless cocaine problem,
they had no idea how low I'd really sunk though.

I knew then that it was time to do something about my problem.
I marched straight up to that bar and ordered Vodka after Vodka,
downing them all in one go.
In the following weeks I started to reclaim my life and restore some normality.

The weekends passed by in drunken blurs.
Once again I'd wake up with zero recollection of the night before.
I resumed missing Mondays at work.
Got that bank balance back into a healty overdrawn position.
After a few months I'd even gotten my old red face and gut back.
Times were good.

I'm still stuck with the house though, but I'm working on it.
Norm, the accountant who drinks at my local,
has advised me that now is a great time to sell,
so I'm going to get rid of it as soon as possible.
I mean, who needs a mortgage to be worrying about
when you're out on the lash with the lads?

I guess I'm just lucky that I got my act together when I still had a chance.
From time to time I still get the old urges though.
Those inexplixable hankerings for money, dignity and health.

Don't worry, those mistakes are in the past.
I'll never go down the shameful road of Sobriety again.

I hope my story can be an inspiration, to anyone else out there
who's gotten lured into a life of Sobriety.

This is awesome. Do you write for a paper or something??? Cuz if ya don't ya should.

Armin_Tamzarian

Fago_25 wrote: »

This is awesome. Do you write for a paper or something??? Cuz if ya don't ya should.

Funny you should mention that, I've already been accused of being a journalist today.

http://www.boards.ie/vbulletin/showpost.php?p=59772590&postcount=8

Although after the day I've had I'm not sure anymore, maybe I am a journalist?

old boy

your next thread is awaited with abaited (sour stinky alcaholic rotten) breath

Seillejet

A very funny and thought provoking read. I was in Dublin city centre today and it was a glimpse of what life would be like without alcohol and pubs.

No seats available in coffee shops, the new drug of choice. You would swear they were giving the stuff away. No real loutish behaviour, people actually using pedestrian crossings, queing orderly at ATM's. SUrreal back to "normal" tomorrow!

Sharpshooter

Armin_Tamzarian wrote: »

Sorry, I can't say that I've ever heard of this 'Cheers' place to which you refer.

Norm's just one of the guys who drinks in my local.
It's a great place, th sort of place where everybody knows your name.

There's Norm with all his sound financial advice, Cliff the wordly postman,
Carla the sassy barmaid and of course my best friend,
the eminent Psychiatrist Robert Terwilliger...



When you click on the 'Thumbs Up' icon on the bottom right of a post
you add 'Thanks From' to the post.

This is a means of showing your appreciation for a post that you find
informative, clever, witty, etc.

Cheers.

Armin_Tamzarian

Seillejet wrote: »

A very funny and thought provoking read. I was in Dublin city centre today and it was a glimpse of what life would be like without alcohol and pubs.

No seats available in coffee shops, the new drug of choice. You would swear they were giving the stuff away. No real loutish behaviour, people actually using pedestrian crossings, queing orderly at ATM's. SUrreal back to "normal" tomorrow!

Ah yes, this is what we refer to as 'The Doomsday Scenario'...