Partner looking at gay porn

LegacyUser

Im 8 mths pregnant and myself and the boyfriend havnt been getting on very well the last while.A couple of nights ago i looked up the history on the laptop and discovered hed been visiting gay porn sites,and yes i was snooping.He checks my phone regulary aswell.Now im not a prude or anything myself,and dont mind a bit of porn but its the fact that its gay porn that hes looking at has me very worried.Id just like a few opinions as im too embarrased to speak about this to anyone else.Should i be worried?

strongbluebell

I'd be worried. Straight men don't look at gay porn.

LegacyUser

I'm straight.... the odd time, very odd time, on a hetro porn site, I might have a goo at some gay porn which they have on it..... maybe once a year possibly. Would never see a guy in real life and think, wow, I'd like to see him naked.

Have only ever gone out with girls and would never want sex with a man.... curiosity maybe; I'm not sure.

Nervous Wreck

Maybe he has homosexual fantasies that he'd never act on?

Maybe he's bisexual and hasn't told you because he's happy with you and wouldn't want to be with another woman, let alone another man?

Maybe he was curious?

Maybe they were pop-ups and he just needs to update his pop-up blocker?

Maybe he's gay and doesn't love you anymore?


All very possible. Why do the two of you constantly check up on each other? That's the weirdest thing about the whole situation, imo.

As Nervous Wreck said when you click on some malicious porn sites,they can open up multiple browser tabs or windows with pages containing all sorts.

I once did this [by accident of course:D] and there was all manner of things popping up that I wouldn't dream of looking at in a million years [honest!]
All of this appeared in my history.
At one stage I was clicking so fast to try and close down the tabs that just kept coming and coming,I may aswell have been playing a shoot em up computer game,it was futile.

So Op I wouldnt worry about it too much.
I'd certainly advise not starting another row over this.Just keep an eye on it.

banquo

It's true, it could just be some dodgy site redirections. See if it keeps up.

On one hand, he could just have some bisexual fantasies that he's not acting on. It's not unusual. Sexuality is a fluctuating thing.

On the other hand, a good few of my friends are gay and, in gay circles, guys who didn't realise they were gay until they were 30 and had part-raised 2 kids were by no means the exception.

As for the fights you've been having, I wouldn't worry. You're 8 months pregnant. I'd be worried if you weren't having fights

MelonieHead

It might be different for men now but as a woman I look at gay porn. (I meant with two women obviously)

LegacyUser

I am straight and have viewed gay/bi porn on rare occasions. I have to admit that the thoughts of having a threesome with another bi guy and a girl have crossed my mind. Guys unless you have experienced the pleasure of an anal orgasm I wouldn't knock it and actually encourage experimentations.

LegacyUser

How about you ask him? Surely he is not one of the people you are embarrassed to discuss this with, and if he is.... well then what the hell are you bringing a child into the world with him for??

Loomis

Was there any heterosexual porn in the history?

LegacyUser

Unregistered wrote: »

How about you ask him? Surely he is not one of the people you are embarrassed to discuss this with, and if he is.... well then what the hell are you bringing a child into the world with him for??

op here,well its a tad too late for that now dont you think???i did say it to him,he said he was just messing around.I just have a gut instinct that all is not what it seems there.Or it could be my hormomes as am feeling a tad crazy at the moment,am very teary and can overreact to anything at the minute.Am just going to keep an eye and give him the benefit of the doubt for now.I actually said it to one of my friends yesterday and she just laughed and said thats your hormones.So time will tell.

It definatley wasnt just popups though,because when i clicked on to the history a lot of videos that had been viewed came up.I suppose i just got a shock.Thanks everyone for your replies,just hope i wont be posting a "help,just found out my partners gay" thread in a few years..

LegacyUser

Unregistered wrote: »

op here,well its a tad too late for that now dont you think???i did say it to him,he said he was just messing around.I just have a gut instinct that all is not what it seems there.Or it could be my hormomes as am feeling a tad crazy at the moment,am very teary and can overreact to anything at the minute.Am just going to keep an eye and give him the benefit of the doubt for now.I actually said it to one of my friends yesterday and she just laughed and said thats your hormones.So time will tell.

It definatley wasnt just popups though,because when i clicked on to the history a lot of videos that had been viewed came up.I suppose i just got a shock.Thanks everyone for your replies,just hope i wont be posting a "help,just found out my partners gay" thread in a few years..

Sorry, but from the first post it didn't sound me as if you HAD mentioned it to him, that's what I meant.Good to see you asked him about it.

Can't say as I could reconcile 'messing around' and watching a load of gay porn though.So id keep an eye on that.

LegacyUser

OMG let the guy have his own private fetishes or fantasies even if it is gay porn. Its not really that much of a big deal.

LegacyUser

Unregistered wrote: »

OMG let the guy have his own private fetishes or fantasies even if it is gay porn. Its not really that much of a big deal.

Everyone draws the line somewhere. To the OP it IS a big deal. Would you say the same if it were child pornography?

Nervous Wreck

Unregistered wrote: »

Everyone draws the line somewhere. To the OP it IS a big deal. Would you say the same if it were child pornography?

Please don't make that connection, it's EXTREMELY different.

mysterious

Maybe he was just curious?

I don't think that browsing gay porn actually makes you gay considering he obviously likes woman that including you. The same way a man in a waiting room just picked up a womans magazine and just read it, does this make you woman suddenly once you read it? Or a straight man going into a gaybar, suddenly makes you gay??

I dunno, I just hate seeing everything label like this.


Maybe he was bored
Maybe hes had bi tendancies as a teenager and never acted on them.
Maybe hes just suddenly got drifted into many porn categories and just got carried away
Maybe it's just a phrase
Maybe he is gay
Maybe hes bi
Maybe he hit it by accident.

Who knows? Does it really have to be a big deal if you still love each other. If you don't love each other, then yes I would certainly question alot of things including this. This is just my two cent's