Very sensitive issue

concern

I just want to get some honest advice on what to do regarding a horrible situation. I have to be a little vague on some things as this is ongoing and I don't want to make matters worse for the family involved but I am really concerned.

This is factual and not hear say! I am aware of an allegation of child sexual abuse of a young child against a man living very close to me. I believe this allegation (I can't disclose why but the police, etc are aware). Thing is this man does not live here permanently but visits from time to time (again, I can't explain the situation fully). After the allegation became known to the family where this man visits, I presumed he would never set foot near the house again even though the family themselves are very odd I still thought they would feel some responsibility. However, I am just after finding out that this man is still going out with a person who lives in the house near me and to say I am disgusted is an understatement.

Besides this I am worried that this man is in our area where there are loads of kids, including my own and nothing can be done about it as the young child who made the allegation is refusing to talk about it now and the case has been put on hold leaving this man free to come and go as he pleases and doing god knows what to god knows how many other kids. No one else besides the two families involved and a handful of other people know about this.

I am sickened by the whole things and the guards can't do anything.
I am not one for taking the Law into my own hands but with such a serious matter I am wondering would it be wrong of me to inform some people who live in the area. I am fearful myself. I think people deserve to know. Like I said this isn't here say, I know the "allegation" is true.

Just to mention that the family of the child making the allegation does not live near by so they would not be effected by people in this area knowing.

Any advice greatly appreciated.

Thoie

I think you need to be careful - do you know that it's true that an allegation was made, or do you have some evidence that man abused that child?

Personally I think it would be wrong of you to spread these allegations around. There is no harm in keeping a watchful eye over your own children, and, for example, calling them in to tidy their rooms/have tea/whatever if you spot them heading into that house.

Nevyn

You can't know for 100% that the allegation is true unless you witnessed an event or an assualt on the child yourself.
We do have due process in this country and yes the system is flawed but that does not mean we can take justice into our own hands or should slander someone.

IF this person was a direct danger to children while walking down the street then
the garda would have done something by now.

All you can do is mind your own children and pray other parents do too.

concern

Like I said I know this allegation is true i.e. I know this happened. I can not give away too much information but from a medical point of view there is evidence however, as the child has now refused to talk about it the case is on hold. Personally I wouldn't see it as spreading allegations but thanks for the imput, I will take it on board. I am aware of our due process and that is why the case is on hold, as the child is scared to talk anymore.

I always mind my children and look out for others as best I can and I would appreciate if someone knew something like this about someone in the area that they would tell. My concern is about protecting children not protecting people who harm them.

Nevyn

What advice did the garda give ?
What advice did the Dept of public procecution give ?
What if you spreading the 'news' of the allegation about meant that when the case
got to court it was some how impared or biased and the charges had to be dropped ?

themadchef

Yes it is a sensitive issue.

This man has not been found guilty of anything. I know you're worried, any parent would. Fact is though he has not been found guilty. You are not the judge and jury on this mans guilt.

Allegations, accusations etc. There is no way you are privy to all of the facts. Let the guards do their work and try to have faith in the legal system

Leave the man alone and look after your own kids.

concern

The Gardai were also under the impression that this person would not be back in the area and the family of the child making the allegation were told they could get a barring order against him, now that's good for that child but what about others (as that child doesn't live in the area)? Also the DPP have not received the file yet as the child's formal statement can not be obtained yet. The Garda specialist said that it can take a few years for the child to talk about this again.
You hit the nail on the head of my uncertainty of why not to tell people (and I don't regard it as spreading "news" either). Would it jeopardise the case? On the other hand it takes years for cases like this to go to court and in the mean time like I said this man could do whatever to whichever child.
Thanks for the imput, telling is not something I would do without thinking it fully through.

concern

WOW, how P.C. society has become.

Thoie

I don't see any of the advice as being PC - rather I see us reverting to the good old Irish "Say nothin'".

I think maybe the best thing to do would be have a chat with your local garda community liaison officer. Express your fears and doubts to him, and ask if it is possible for the gardai to alert people in the area somehow without jeopardising any future trial. Understand that he may not be able to explain his reasons, but he will do what he can to protect the people in his community, and may already be doing so without you noticing.

Nevyn

concern wrote: »

WOW, how P.C. society has become.

Boards.ie as a site can not and will not allow posts which advocate or condone
illegal acts. Yes concern it can jeopardise the case and that is a risk which I know
I can't take. At this point your best bet is to check with those who were suggested
in this thread and make up your own mind so at this juncture I am going to lock this thread.

concern

Thanks Thoie, practical advise there about the liaison Garda. Will contact him/her tomorrow. I was mearly making an observational statement there Thaedydal, I never asked anyone to advocate or condone illegal acts. I was looking for advice on a horrible situation and see that some find it difficult to discuss the issue and would rather it wasn't brought up.

Nevyn

concern if it was a dicussion on a hypothetical situation that would be one thing but
there is a case pending and we can't discuss current or pending cases on this site.