Best friend and girlfriend hooked up. What do I do?

LegacyUser

ok, , ive had the suspicion for a while now. so threw out some feelers and got some info from a friend.

apparently the girl im seeing for a couple of years was always seeing one of my best friends behind my back for about 6 months,.

she apparently told this other girl and some friends all about it. but when i confronted her she said it was only once. they were both very drunk and he took advantage of her.

he, on the other hand swore blind that it never happened at all.

what do i do?

Miss Fluff

You poor thing. I see you posted at night, I presume you probably gleaned this information when everyone had drink taken. Before taking this further and confronting parties involved make sure you get the facts from someone reliable in the cole sober light of day.

Terrible to be betrayed like that

Sleepy

kick 'em both to the kerb.

thorbarry

there is lies goin on, and lies are never good... u need to find out the truth somehow and make a descision on that

Redpunto

somebody be lying as they both cant be telling the truth - wait until everyone is sober and calm and try and get the truth out of them.

trust your gut instinct though - its usually right and if you feel that it did happen you seriously need to lose those 2 people in your life.

road_2_damascus

Does she have a sister or a good looking best friend? you know what you have to do... then dump her like nuclear waste... then move on to your best frien's sister

LegacyUser

road_2_damascus wrote: »

Does she have a sister or a good looking best friend? you know what you have to do... then dump her like nuclear waste... then move on to your best frien's sister

+1....best advice i've seen on boards in a long time!

LegacyUser

o/p here

no i was only on late cause i couldnt sleep. this info came to light on friday night and its just being bugging me since then.

me and herself have had some great times and it would be a shame to waste although i think thats what i must do. she is so so sorry and feels so bad over the whole thing and doesnt want it to end. says it was a mistake and it just happened.


she still swears it was only once, but according to someone else. she told others it was happening for months.

still confused,


ps. i would normally attribute this type of thing to 16 years olds but were all adults, 30 like, so its not just teenage drama

EPM

Unregistered wrote: »

o/p here

no i was only on late cause i couldnt sleep. this info came to light on friday night and its just being bugging me since then.

me and herself have had some great times and it would be a shame to waste although i think thats what i must do. she is so so sorry and feels so bad over the whole thing and doesnt want it to end. says it was a mistake and it just happened.


she still swears it was only once, but according to someone else. she told others it was happening for months.

still confused,


ps. i would normally attribute this type of thing to 16 years olds but were all adults, 30 like, so its not just teenage drama

I can't believe how calm you are for a start. If she's lying to you still you know what you have to do. Seriously, you need to get the full story matching on all sides. Sickener and I feel sorry for you. Best of luck

lolli

Unregistered wrote: »

me and herself have had some great times and it would be a shame to waste

Sorry darling but she ruined that when she cheated on you. Sounds like she was bragging to her mates that she was getting away with it for so long. Either way... you have been betrayed by two very important people in your life. I personally would think more of myself than to ever have anything else to do with either of them.

Liam Byrne

Ditch both of them, because they've both shown that they don't care about you or respect you.

He's not your "best friend", because best friends wouldn't do that.
She's no longer interested in being your g/f, because if she was she wouldn't have looked twice at someone else, and DEFINITELY wouldn't have hooked up with your so-called "best friend".

Miss Fluff

Unregistered wrote: »

me and herself have had some great times and it would be a shame to waste although i think thats what i must do.

Hate to say it but she doesn't respect you mate, neither does your "best mate". Cut them both loose. Can't begin to imagine how you are feeling you poor thing.

myusernameis

Can you trust the other friend that told you, OP? But its a preety nasty thing to do. Your girlfriend did lie and ultimately you only found out when she someone else told you, she didnt tell you. And if its going on for six months well thats just not on. Ultimately you will have to live with the decision if you agree to forgive her, but can you do it? I'd just be worried she could do it if she done it before. You deserve a good honest relationship, dont you OP? but whether you feel the good times outweigh the bad times its entirely your choice. But definetly lose the 'friend' anyway, best of luck.

LegacyUser

ok the update

she admits everything now.

asked the other fella once more, did it happen

he admitted it did, but only once. at this time, she promised only once. later, after me telling her i dont believe her a million times, she admitted it was ongoing.

i asked her was she talking to the other fella and she told me she text him and told him she told me it was once, so that was the basis of his "confession"

it was obviously going on all the time we were at events and weddings and parties together, what a ****in mug i feel.

road_2_damascus

Op, you are now in an optimum position, you have come out of this nasty little game of deceipt and betrayal as the guy who did no wrong. Keep the chin up and the back straight, hold your head high, and show the world that you are not going to be broken by the treacherous actions of so-called friends. To be honest, you dont seem to have come out of this too badly, looking at your posts. Time to stand back up, brush yourself down and start all over again.. look at the weather, take off for the weekend and head to the coast, find yourself a decent girlfriend

themacdaddy

Get away from both of them. They are texting behind your back lieing and with holding information on their cheating from you! How can you trust either of them in fairness. Life is too short to be made a fool of and sadly thats the way it looks to me! It does seem she was boasting about her cheating too and thus obviously didn't care how you would feel about it! Can you imagine (potentially) spending the rest of your life with someone like that! I can't. Best of luck mate. I hope you see sense and move on with out them.

Crash Bang Wall

Former best friend and former girlfriend

zootroid

Unregistered wrote: »

ok the update

she admits everything now.

asked the other fella once more, did it happen

he admitted it did, but only once. at this time, she promised only once. later, after me telling her i dont believe her a million times, she admitted it was ongoing.

i asked her was she talking to the other fella and she told me she text him and told him she told me it was once, so that was the basis of his "confession"

it was obviously going on all the time we were at events and weddings and parties together, what a ****in mug i feel.

Don't be too hard on yourself, you did nothing wrong, and they have both been exposed for who they really are. People like that never go far, others will always remember what they are really like

I'm also going to assume that you are going to tell each one to f*** off?