Think I've blown it - Really Sad

LegacyUser

Hi everyone,

Long one - sorry. Met up with an ex a few weeks ago and we have been texting and phoning and emailing and have met a few times and the connection between us is amazing. I have NEVER stopped loving him and I have an ache in my heart when I think of him, my heart skips a beat etc etc.

Anyway - Like an idiot after a few drinks last Thursday Night I sent him an email declaring my undying love ...... We were due to meet up on Friday night and it would have been our first night together, but I wasn't able to contact him, or Saturday, but contacted him today after 50 million phone calls / texts / messages left, he had dropped his phone and it was being repaired, and was sorry about that.

Anyway .... I phoned his job today as we were meant to meet up the line was bad ... I was talking to someone who said they were going for a shower and dopey me said that he shouldn't tell me those sort of things that I would love to join him, proceeded to tell him what I would like to do and then he asked me who I was looking for .... I could have died, I should have hung up, but said 'is this not *********' and he said no. I almost died and asked could he have him call me.

Well he did call me and I asked was he talking with the lads from work and he said no - but they are all laughing and he didn't know why, I told him - HE WAS NOT IMPRESSED !!!! The reason being... he has recently separated from his wife and they would know her and her is someone making booty calls. I know I'm an idiot - utter idiot.

I AM SO EMBARRASSED - but apart from that I think I have blown it, and I didn't mean to...

I sent a text saying I will leave him be and he can call me when he is ready - whats the chances of him calling / texting / emailing ?

Now I probably look like a clingy eejit ... I know even writing this it looks like I'm a boiler bunny, but I'm not - it was just a lack of communication, or rather, almost too much communication. I kept trying to phone him to apologise and the more I couldn't contact him the more I tried.

Should I stop while I'm ahead, try hold my head up with my last scrap of dignity I have - leave the ball in his court.

Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated - an embarrassed girlie !!!!!!!

Nervous Wreck

Unregistered wrote: »

Should I stop while I'm ahead

Ahead? Where'd ya get that from!?

I'd quit now though. Send him a text maybe and just say "Sorry about coming off like a weirdo, just wanted to apologise. Gimme a bell if you want to have that [drink/coffee/whatever] at some stage. Talk soon, [BLANK]."

LegacyUser

Hi,

I did, I sent a text apologising for what happened if he wanted to talk he knew where I was. I have a funny feeling I won't be hearing from him again :-(

In one foul swoop - gone ! All Gone !!

Cmol

This might all sound a bit harsh but this reminds me a lot of that movie / book - He's Just Not That Into You - I think the one thing that stuck with me from that movie is if he is into you HE WILL CONTACT YOU. So he had his phone broken and didnt get in contact until after you got in contact with him? Sounds like a plausable excuse, but I know if that was me and I really wanted to get in contact with someone. I would. Simple as. There are so many different mediums to contact people nowadays a broken phone is no excuse as far as I'm concerned.

My advice would be to do your best to move on with your life. Try not to pin all your hopes on getting a txt or phone call off him. I dont know the guy, I dont know what he's thinking but it sounds like he has far too much control over how your feeling. Its not fun someone else control your feelings and you need to get that control back.

LegacyUser

oh i think we've all been there and made that call we shouldn't have.
my advise is to leave it. move on. if he is into you he'll call but definately do not call him in the meantime.
P

LegacyUser

Hi again,

Yes, many hours later and still completely mortified I have decided to take it on the chin and accept that I think hell will be freezing over before contact will be made.

It's funny Cmol, but I just didn't think of that movie 'he's just not that into you' and now that you have mentioned it I am even more embarrassed. I am actually an intelligent woman who went and did a very unintelligent thing.

The worst thing is I went out and spent a fortune on the sexiest underwear for our special night on Friday night, and the gas thing is that if it had of been a friend of mine telling me this story on Friday I would have said exactly the same thing.

Thanks for the words of wisdom ... here's to learning what not to do in the future and learning from our mistakes....

Monkey61

OP rest assured that it is nothing that you have done.

As others have rightly pointed out, if he likes you, he will get in touch and want to see you...an email and a phone mishap would not put him off. If he doesn't get in touch, well then he just wasn't that into it.

estar

ok, you went a lot over board with the communication. but you have learned from this. if he liked you, he would have met up with you Friday, that dropping the phone thing. hmmm. anyway he wasnt for you. for the future, learn to hold back on the impulse to dive in and communicate via email and text and wait until you see someone face to face. often i find people are far more intimate than they are comfortable with via email than they would be face to face = embarrassment. no one died. emails and texts are a useless medium of communication. leave them for the purposes for which they were conceived. making arrangements to meet up, reminders, and business communication. i dont think they are quite up to complicated emotional exchanges. for that you need facial expressions and tone of voice. you will meet someone who matches your passion for them equally with passion for you.

Cmol

Unregistered wrote: »

Hi again,

Yes, many hours later and still completely mortified I have decided to take it on the chin and accept that I think hell will be freezing over before contact will be made.

It's funny Cmol, but I just didn't think of that movie 'he's just not that into you' and now that you have mentioned it I am even more embarrassed. I am actually an intelligent woman who went and did a very unintelligent thing.

The worst thing is I went out and spent a fortune on the sexiest underwear for our special night on Friday night, and the gas thing is that if it had of been a friend of mine telling me this story on Friday I would have said exactly the same thing.

Thanks for the words of wisdom ... here's to learning what not to do in the future and learning from our mistakes....

Dont feel stupid, men can have an annoying habit of turning the most confident, intelligent of us into emotionally clingy wrecks!!!

Hope things get easier