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Am I right to be sickened by this...

  • 06-03-2009 10:44am
    #1
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭


    I was going out with a girl for about a month and a half earlier this year, and during that time while we did fool around a good bit, we never actually had sex. I found this a little strange at the time, but didnt read too much into it as I was enjoying our time together and felt that she probably just needed some time (I was 21, she was 19) to get used to the idea.

    We broke up amicably and have remained friends, but starting about 2 weeks after we broke up she has been telling me about all these guys she has jumped into bed with recently, and seems to have no qualms about it. She honestly thinks it doesnt bother me to hear about this stuff, but everytime I do I get led back to the same question: she doesnt seem to have a problem jumping into bed with these guys, what was so wrong with me when we were going out? I should explain that I dont want her back as such, its just a blow to the self esteem every time I hear about it. Am I being selfish and juvenile?


Comments

  • #2
    AARRRGH
    Closed Accounts Posts: 12,382 ✭✭✭✭AARRRGH


    Unregistered wrote: »
    Am I being selfish and juvenile?

    Maybe she's the one being selfish and juvenile? You know, making up stories to mess with your head. There are a lot of unstable/psycho people in this world.

    Or maybe she has been banging around. Lots of people after a break up (even a short month and a half relationship like you had) "lose it" for a bit and slut around. Nothing wrong with that really, but it's not very nice of her to be telling you about it.

    I suspect she is making it up though, just to mess with your head.


  • #3
    Poloman
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 208 ✭✭Poloman


    I reckon she is making it up to make you feel jealous. Immaturity its called.


  • #4
    cantdecide
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 11,465 ✭✭✭✭cantdecide


    She's messing with you or she only ever just saw you as a friend. You do sound like a nice guy and I feel your pain.

    If you're still emotionally attached, a) tell her you don't want to hear about her sex life AT ALL and b) consider avoiding her for a while...


  • #5
    markesmith
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,752 ✭✭✭markesmith


    Why are you still hanging around with her? Cut all contact mate, it's the only way.


  • #6
    Galvasean
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 30,746 ✭✭✭✭Galvasean


    Unregistered wrote: »
    Am I being selfish and juvenile?

    Quite the opposite actually. Your ex is the juvenille one. There is no need to hark on to an ex about the sex you're having. Whether she is actually having regular sex or just makiing it up to annoy you is mostly irrelevent. The only reason why she's telling you is to rub it in.


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  • #7
    chavezychavez
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 963 ✭✭✭chavezychavez


    Yup, sounds like a load of ring to me. Start hanging around with your other friends, and stop listening to her "exploit" stories.
    Get on with your life and don't allow yourself to be brought down emotionally becuase of her. She'll tire of being ignored eventually.


  • #8
    Faith
    Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 30,661 Mod ✭✭✭✭Faith


    Maybe she won't sleep with someone quickly if she considers them "relationship material" but is happy to quickly sleep with guys she won't be interested in seeing again?

    That, or she's doing it to make you jealous.


  • #9
    Wagon
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,119 ✭✭✭Wagon


    She's just messing with your head. Doesn't matter if it's true or not, she shouldn't be telling you this crap. Tell her to piss off, she's hardly what you'd call a friend.


  • #10
    Kirnsy
    Closed Accounts Posts: 970 ✭✭✭Kirnsy


    i think shes trying to bring you for a trip to the jealou-sea ;)

    tell her to leave you alone and to grow up


  • #11
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭LegacyUser


    When I was around 20 I was seeing a girl for about 3 months or so and we never slept together (i just put this down to her not being ready) but just sort of amicably agreed to stop messing around and within a week or two she was telling me of men she had slept with since and I thought the same thing as you OP, why sleep with these guys within 2 weeks and not me who had been seeing you for 3 months. It got me down and affected me quite a bit when it really of shouldnt have. Instead of trying to stay friends or anything I just told her I didnt want to hear any of her stories and cut contact and I was the better for it, she was just an immature head wrecker. Turns out I dodged a bullet with this one! Just forget about what she is doing OP cause she is just trying to mess with your head. The funny thing is that after 5 years everytime I meet this girl she tries to sleep with me......not a chance of that ever happening, she had her chance and burned her bridges.


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