Favourite funny quotes fun time

Cupcake_Crisis

This should be good for a chuckle. Every one poist at least one of their favourite funny quotes from tv, movies, or where ever you get your ya ya's.

I know its prolly been done done but i is bored!!

I have several!

"Im not puttin it up to 8, it'll blow me c0ck off!!" IT Crowd

"im wrestling with the white middle class......hes wearing my watch!!!" Peep show

"ooooh noooo briaaaaan....we need paper towels.....oooh...its going under the fridge.....oohhhhhh we are gonna have ants" Family guy

Pretty much every thing from Shameless

Your turn

Abi

Me boredz too

Anything from Superbad. Legendary.


Seth:
"Take off the vest. You look Pinnochio"

Seth:
"These arent dried up old ladies, they're good to go"

Fogal:
"Ooo I got a boner!"

Armin_Tamzarian

You just cock-blocked McLovin....

As ya know Ted, I'm very sceptical.

You a Bounty Hunter?
Man's gotta do somethin for a livin...
Dyin aint much of a living boy...

Can we get some freakin sharks with freakin laser beams attached?

Are they ill-tempered, mutated Sea Bass?

Ugh... Butters, go buy world of warcraft, install it on your computer, and join the online sensation before we all murder you!

Abi

"Did you do the motorboat? you did, you motor boatin' son of a bïtch" - Wedding Crashers.

Black Swan

PETER SELLERS sees dog in Hotel Lobby and asks: "Does your dog bite?"

INNKEEPER: "No."

SELLERS's leans over, pets dog, and dog bites him! Cries out: "I thought you said your dog doesn't bite?"

INNKEEPER: "That's not my dog."

banshee_bones

father ted: down with that sort of thing!
Doughal: Careful now!

mrs doyle: ah go on go on go on go on go on go on

father jack: Feck! Drink! Arse! Girls!


Zoolander: " I'm pretty sure there's a lot more to life than being really, really, ridiculously good looking. And I plan on finding out what that is"

Anchorman:
Ron Burgundy:I]to dog[/I You're so wise. You're like a miniature Buddha, covered in hair.

It's called Sex Panther by Odeon. It's illegal in nine countries... Yep, it's made with bits of real panther, so you know it's good.

Ron Burgundy: You are a smelly pirate hooker.

Brick: I LOVE LAMP!!!

oh and so so many more from anchorman!

Matt Holck

DRAGON
hmm
not a cat stuck in a lute then
JANE
So what do you think of it
a cry to strike fear into the hearts of my enemy?
DRAGON
hearts, no
bladders, maybe.


SIR IVAN
very good lad
if you want a farm job scaring crows


jane and the dragon - for crying out loud

Hermy

You should never mix your drinks!

hedgeh0g

To a bar man .... A pint of Guinness and what ever Im having yourself.


bumping into some one ........ why dont you watch where Im going!

Hermy

Water is a great drink if taken in the right spirit!

Ave Sodalis

"Father Jack: Floor.
Father Ted: Well done Father!
Father Jack: Chair.
Father Ted: Yes Father! Very good!
Father Jack: Curtains.
Father Ted: Yes! Oh well done!
Father Jack: Gob****e"

staker

andy dufrane to morgan freeman in shawshank
"why do they call you red?"

"maybe it's because i'm irish"

cracks me up every time:D

Kimia

Family Guy quotes are the best:

Stewie: You know, I rather like this God fellow. Very theatrical, you know. Pestilence here, a plague there. Omnipotence ... gotta get me some of that.

Armin_Tamzarian

Dear diary........ Jackpot...

Bijoux

Passion of the Christ 2 - Crucify This!

Chris Tucker: 'Jesus Christ, for the Son of God, you sure are a son of a bítch'

Ah Family Guy.
Where would the world be without it.

Topper Harley

Some of Homer's (Simpson) wisdom:

"Ah, beer. The cause of and the solution to all of life's problems."

"Apu, you got any Skittle Brau? Never mind, just give me some Duff and a pack of Skittles."

"I'm not impressed easily. Wow! A blue car!"


And something from Dodgeball:

"Let me tell you, a double-fault final-play elimination hasn't occurred since the Helsinki episode of 1919, and I think we all remember how THAT turned out!"

miss.lost

Anna ferris in House Bunny when teaching girls how to apply makeup..."Your eyes are sooo important, they are the nipples of your face"...


Coronation street...

Sally:"Sophie eat your dinner... think of all the starving children in africa"
Sophie:"NAME ONE"

Matt Holck

Doc Hopper: [pointing to a billboard showing a bucket of "Doc Hopper's French Fried Frog Legs"]
Isn't that splendid? Just splendid! Just take a look at it.

Kermit: All I can see are millions of frogs with tiny crutches.

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0079588/quotes

Matt Holck

[Sulu's ship witnesses a huge explosion on the Klingon moon, Praxis]
Brigadier Kerla: This is Brigadier Kerla speaking for the High Command. There has been an incident on Praxis. However, everything is under control, we have no need for assistance. Obey treaty stipulations and remain outside the Neutral Zone. This transmission ends now.
Captain Hikaru Sulu: An "incident"?
Commander Janice Rand: Do we report this, sir?
Captain Hikaru Sulu: [Turning to Rand] Are you kidding?

Armin_Tamzarian

This Simpsons classic from 'Comicbook Store Guy' is questioning Alec Baldwin...

"Alec, Alec, regarding that so called "silent" propulsion system in
"The Hunt For Red October",
I printed out a list of technical errors which I think you'd enjoy discussing."


And from Intermission...

-"Jaysus, who did that to ya?"

-"Your auld one man.
She poked me in the eye wid her cock!"

James T Kirk

Blue_Lagoon wrote: »

PETER SELLERS sees dog in Hotel Lobby and asks: "Does your dog bite?"

INNKEEPER: "No."

SELLERS's leans over, pets dog, and dog bites him! Cries out: "I thought you said your dog doesn't bite?"

INNKEEPER: "That's not my dog."

Such a funny scene.

Hermy wrote: »

You should never mix your drinks!

That entire film is just one big bellylaugh oneliner. Absolutely one of my fave films, never mind comedies, of all time. :pac:

What about:

You were only supposed to blow the bloody doors off!

Matt Holck

Kerny: Is there them dragon things?
Lisa: Isn't that a little cliche'?
*Juliette swats Lisa's Head*
Lisa: I mean yes, yes!

Lisa the Drama Queen - The Simpsons

Matt Holck

You have the right to be delighted, if you do not have a gift one will be provided for you.

Simpsons - Chief Wiggim

Black Swan

"Is that a pistol in your pocket, or you glad to see me?" (May West)

Brian2208

RALPH: Hi super Nintendo chalmers! we're learning

classic

culchienator

Me fail English? that's umpossible. - Ralph Wiggam