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Closure on old flame

  • 24-02-2009 2:42pm
    #1
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭


    Hey,

    I met an old flame recently and never did get closure when we broke up. It was great to see him again, I mean REALLY great, unfortunatley I have been thinking about him non stop since. I phoned him and explained this even though I am married, but how do I get closure for myself. He too is married.

    Are there any goods books etc or something, anything to help me overcome these feelings..... I suppose he's a lost love to me and I cannot explain it, and I know I should just 'get over him and it', but if I could I wouldn't be here asking.

    Thanks in advance.


Comments

  • #2
    starflake
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 842 ✭✭✭starflake


    Walk away now and dont look back. Dont contact him, just leave it be. I know those feelings and they cause too much hurt and damage. Just go to your husband give him a big hug and tell him that you love him. Let him love you and you'll see things worked out that way for a reason.


  • #3
    star-pants
    Closed Accounts Posts: 13,429 ✭✭✭✭star-pants


    It's hard when you don't have proper closure - but I'm sure there were reasons for ye splitting up. And think about how great a life you have now with your husband. The best thing is to try and remember that yes things were great with your old flame, but that was then. This is now and of course all you'll remember is the disney good stuff from the relationship. Everyone looks back on certain relationships about things and remember the good times. It's not bad - but don't let it take over.


  • #4
    Nitxteha
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 139 ✭✭Nitxteha


    People try to idealise the past. Why did you agree to meet him? You broke up with him for a reason, or? Think about those reasons.

    How long were you together and when did you break up? The longer it was the more you may be idealising him.

    Don't fall for that trap and focus on your husband. Love him and not a silly idea of what your ex boyfriend would be like.

    Write down or think about all the good things of your life with your husband, I'm sure if you chose him and not your ex, it's because of a reason.

    Don't complicate your life with exs, be happy ;)


  • #5
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭LegacyUser


    Hi

    Well I got closure whether I wanted to or not. I have been deleted as a friend from Facebook, so I don't think it is something I now have to worry about in the sense of him letting me know how he feels.

    Why was I such an idiot ! I am SUCH AN IDIOT ! IDIOT IDIOT IDIOT !!!!!


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