Not sure if this will work out with foreign girl...

LegacyUser

Met this girl online, and she wants to live with me, and live off me, in Ireland. She at college in her own country and has now decided she wants to flee to me. My heart tells me yes! But my head tells me there won't be much for her here to do, and we will have little money due to my unemployment, and the dire economic situation the country is in. She wants us to "be together forever". Do you think this can work out with the clash in cultures etc? Am I damaging her future prospects by bringing her here, and letting her leave college? Or is it a good thing she has dedicated herself to me?

Wibbs

Bad plan on so many levels. Love won't feed you, so she would need to get a job here as would you. She will get homesick. She will miss her family. Sooner or later she'll likely resent you for giving up her studies. Sooner or later a decision will have to be made over where you'll end up living. Think this through more. Less with your heart and willy, more with your head.

sardineta

Does she have the right of EU residency? If so, perhaps she can transfer her studies here.

It may be the way you've written it, but it does sound like a mail-order bride and the notion that she'd live off you whilst you being unemployed is quite laughable.

Given that the economic situation in Ireland is so poor and likely to be so for a number of years, perhaps you should suggest to her that you go to her country to "be together forever" so she can study and you can look for work. Not sure she'll like that idea quite so much...

Mr. Incognito

Hmmmmmmmmmmm,

Sounds dodgy to me. She hasn't even met you yet. Sounds like someone looking for a green card to be honest.

ManOfMystery

Have a read of this, hopefully this will make your mind up.

http://boards.ie/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=2055472218

Otis Driftwood

Unregistered wrote: »

Or is it a good thing she has dedicated herself to me?

Dude,are you seriously considering this???????1 word.

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

LegacyUser

Hi again guys, yer wan is reeling me in more and more all the time!! I asked her about her studies, and she said she is finishing it soon - very soon. I live at home, and I haven't told both my parents. I told my da after some alcohol, and he was pretty cool with it, but he was under the unfluence himself and he hasn't mentioned it since when sober. I'm worried my ma will be shocked at the thought of a foreign girl moving in to the house. I'm sure we can support her aswell. We have agreed that our future is only "us", we both want a long term relationship.

sammyv

mmmmm....i'd love to say go for it!! but holy crap, are you mad??
Love really is blind!! I dont want to sound horrible, and normally i want to believe that peoples love lives will be good, but this girl is using you to get to Ireland.
Im in a LDR at the min, and we have been together 1 year, and its only now that we are discussing moving in together.
Don't rush into anything,if she is in love with you, then she will wait before moving.

Why dont you suggest moving over to her, seeing as you are not working???

Pub07

OP how long have you known her?
Have you ever met her in real life?
What ages are you?

missmatty

0mg. Seriously? :eek:

ManOfMystery

OP did you look at the link I posted? It's an almost identical situation to yours.

John_Mc

Been there, done that - DON'T DO IT!

As soon as she arrives, you'll feel a weight on your shoulders as you realise you're committed to her now. There's no telling her where to go no matter how bad things get, cos she'll have no one to go to and no money to go back home.

Believe me when I say this - DON'T DO IT!

Gyalist

Have you ever met this woman in person?

Have you had any previous relationships or is this your first one?

RaverRo808

How come someone be this thick,is this a wind up?either your very young and immature or extremely stupid,cope on man,where is this girl from?

unemployed, living with parents, expecting your parents to take her in and keep her, and you've never met the girl.

flip a coin,
heads and your life stays normal.
tails and you wreck it for a few years.

Acoustic

sponger

she just wants you till she finds better and would use you as a stepping stone , get here stay with you , leech off you and then dump you for a wealthy older guy

tell her to feck off , i put an ad up for the craic on gumtree and i got 30 od responses and 23 were from women in russia wanting to be together till the end

lol

yellowcurl

You're living with your parents and you want to move a foreign girl in who you've never met in real life before?

Get a job (if you can with this recession), move out and then consider if you want to mess things up for a year or two.

It's definitely not fair on your parents if you move this girl in. She will be a drain on their finances too by simply just living in their house. I assume that both you and her will be eating their food etc if neither of you have any money?

Pub07

Unregistered wrote: »

My flute tells me yes!

FYP.

coolmoose

i can't believe the OP is actually serious about this?!

Worst idea I've ever heard (well second to the thread in motors suggesting installing signal blockers in cars to stop people using their mobiles, but I digress)

OP, IMO give this girl a very wide berth, stay well away from this situation!

LegacyUser

I am starting to think with me head more hehe
I have never met her in person, I'm 22. She sounds like a REALLY good person tho, and it takes a lot to impress me. If she is bull-****ting me she is awful scum just.
I deserve happiness in life, someone who loves me, I don't like going to clubs and getting in with girls that would sleep around, and who don't love me, getting some action is great sure, but I want someone who will be honest and faithful etc.
Perhaps we should just meet up for a week, is that best?

Reesy

Unregistered wrote: »

I am starting to think with me head more hehe
I have never met her in person, I'm 22. She sounds like a REALLY good person tho, and it takes a lot to impress me. If she is bull-****ting me she is awful scum just.
I deserve happiness in life, someone who loves me, I don't like going to clubs and getting in with girls that would sleep around, and who don't love me, getting some action is great sure, but I want someone who will be honest and faithful etc.
Perhaps we should just meet up for a week, is that best?

Heck mate, I agree with the majority opinion here. Don't let her come to stay till you know her better. Travel to see her for a week in her country, check her (and her friends) out, learn about her, decide whether you want her in your life. Re your parents, it's their house so it is only fair that they meet her before they decide anything. Beware pregnancy, maybe?

Good luck.

sardineta

Yeah, go visit her and have a nice break. Her response to that idea should tell you much of what you need to know. Where's she based?

LegacyUser

You're living at home and your planning on moving in someone you never met. My God lad don't even dream of it. If i had even dreamed of moving in my boyfriend of four years into my folks i know where i'd be told to go. You don't know her. You don't know her intentions. By all means meet up, see how you both get on but leave the "serious" stuff until you do actualy know each other and do know if you are in love. She could irritate the life out of you IRL for all you know. And living together is a BIG step. I thought i knew my ex pretty well before i moved in with him (we had been talking about marriage kids etc), we got a house together, moved intogether. I was gone 3 weeks later and ended the whole relationship!! Moving in is not a step to be taking lightly.

shmaido

OH HOLY F**K!! Oh mate are you joking? please say you are. Think you need to have a cold shower or two or three, f**k it - ice bath.

You're 22, you're not old and desperate, you're just a raging bag of hormones who would jump at the chance at sex on tap - understandable as I've been there and done that, but good god man COP YOURSELF ON - you'd be just diving head first in to a nasty situation with no real get-out clause. Now that'd be ok if you were 40 and loaded but you can't even support yourself let alone her, and you'll be asking your parents to support you both?...

the mind boggles