Soothers

Quality

What are peoples opinions on them.

Did your children take them and for how long?

My first two loved their "Nu-Nus", They did help pacify them and settle them at night..

My latest edition has no interest what so ever... Gags when you put it in his mouth Prefers to use me as his soother... And he is harder to settle at night!!!

And if you don't like soothers why are you against them?

Billiejo

Every child and parent need is different.
What's not, is that the sucking motion is natural for babes - from thumbsucking time in the womb and much harder to wean thumbsuckers off!!

Frantic parents are unhealthy for babes so if soother sooths parents - go for it.

The upside of soothers is that they may inhibit kids from participating in early talking. Some may grunt or prefer to point instead.
Also impedes non-verbal facial expression which makes up a big part of communication.
In some cases have been known as a source of infection fin some children and linked to ear infections.
May be a good idea to manage soother times from day one. EG nights only or car seat.

marti101

None of mine ever had soothers wasnt against them as such they just didnt like them.And they never sucked their thumb either.I think what really gets people is seeing kids at 4 or 5 with loads of soothers or them falling and their parents picking up and putting in their mouths and giving it to the child. ]#]=

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Nevyn

First did and we got him to only use it at night once he turned about 18 months and it was gone when he was two, the second was never intrested in it at all.

Toots

marti101 wrote: »

I think what really gets people is seeing kids at 4 or 5 with loads of soothers or them falling and their parents picking up and putting in their mouths and giving it to the child.

I never had a soother as a young 'un, because my mum was worried it'd damage my teeth. That was before the orthodontic soothers were brought in to minimalise the chances of this If I had a baby I'd probably give them one if they wanted it, at times like bedtime, but not have them walking around all day with it hanging out of their mouth.

My nephew had a soother until he was 7!! It was a disaster, he would walk around the house with it in his mouth and wouldn't/couldn't go to bed without it either. My biggest fear with using one would be if the child became addicted to it and it then it was a nightmare trying to wean them off it.

January

My LO has one...

I was adamant that I wasn't going to give her one, but while we were in the hospital she nearly sucked the finger off me! So the nurse gave me a soother and she fell straight to sleep. She only uses it for going to sleep or if she's really upset though, if she's awake during the day she won't take it, she "talks" too much for that!!

silja

My two had soothies from about a month old; the boy only took one when going to sleep or when I couldn't feed him right away for some reason (was breastfeeding), and self weaned at four month. The girl still loves her soothie, especially at night when she MUST have it. One particular soothie only, no others will do! I actually heard that it is good for them to have soothies at night until about a year old, as it can lessen the risk of SIDS. We plan to take it away when she is about 1 months old, but right now we are working on transitioning from bottles to cups, so that is enough work

Toots

silja wrote: »

I actually heard that it is good for them to have soothies at night until about a year old, as it can lessen the risk of SIDS.

Yes, I heard that too, was leaning more towards against Soothers until I heard this.

deisemum

Before my first I hadn't a view one way or the other, hadn't even thought of it but when he was 2 days old the midwife recommended one so just went along with it. It did settle him so if it works why not.

Having worked in orthodontics for a number of years I'd seen the damage thumb and finger sucking can do and it's much easier to remove a soother than a thumb or fingers.

My first lad loved his and had them until he was just gone 3 years then he got rid of them himself. He'd sometimes have 2 on the go at the one time. It didn't affect his speech in any way and his speech was very good from an early age, he was speaking 6 or 7 word sentences by his first birthday.

Second fella only had a soother until he was 3 or 4 months as his older brother was partial to taking it.

Soothers are used with premmie babies to help encourage their sucking reflex.

I too have heard that they play a part in minimising the risk of SIDS

Nevyn

Can anyone link to studies or articles about them helping in the prevention of S.I.D.S. ?

noby

Not a fan of them myself, but that's not to say I'm against people using them. We had one in the house when our first was born, just in case. Our third is 14 months now, and that same soother is still in the cupboard, unused.

It would be interesting to see a study to back up the S.I.D.S. claim, or is that just anecdotal?

stovelid

Nothing against them, but would prefer to try other methods of placation first.

Our seven-month old won't take one at all, never did. If food doesn't come out of it, he's not bothered.

Dades

We were determined not to use one, and were lucky enough to have a nipper who didn't force our hand.

My missis talk about friends of hers who stuff a soother into the child as soon at it opens it's mouth. I think people mistake shouting (i.e. talking) for the heck of it for a sign that something's wrong. Some adults would be better off with soothers!

RIRI

Little lad had a "sooo" until he was about 1 but he really only wanted it at night time and then only until he settled himself to sleep, (he never woke looking for it). It eventually went missing & was never replaced.

While I have no real opion either way I do hate seeing 5 year olds with them hanging out of their mouths. Certainly when they're small it's a comfort to both babs & parents

silja

Links to articles about pacifiers helping against SIDS:
http://www.dor.kaiser.org/dors/news/Dec_2005_Pacifier_SIDS.shtml
http://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2007/03/070312152207.htm
http://www.webmd.com/parenting/news/20051208/pacifiers-may-protect-babies-from-sids

littlebitdull

Before my first I would have hated them with a vengence. Always vowed 'no child of mine ....' etc.

Changed my mind after I had him!! He loved his sooothers, but from when he was one we stopped letting him have them while awake. And it was a rare enough time before then he had them - but he always had them for sleeping. In fact up to he turned 4 (blush)...

My two girls had them but were no where near as attached to them as him, the second showed very little interest in them at all. Even though I had colour matched hers to her babygrows the second time around ...

I happened to mention the fact that all of mine had them in front of two aunts of mine recently, and they refused to believe me as they had never seen any of them with a soother.

I think if they are used as a mothers help - not a mothers subsitute - then whats the problem. I would still dislike seeing older children with them.

I have seen kids being dropped off to school and being told to leave the soother behind in the car (!)

Maddison

After my little one was born he was a bit of a screamer so I think the nurse in the hospital got fed up with him so suggested the do di! He more or less gave them up himself when he was about 2.5. His speech is fantastic, he uses words that a lot of 6th class boys would only start using(according to his past two teachers) and his teeth are perfect. So fine by me, but as per another poster It does bother me when a 6/7 year olds have to reluctantly remove their soother before saying hello to you.

Loopy

My first one took one for a couple of months and just stopped then very abruptly.

Second child had no interest in them, thank god..

livvy

Wanted to do everything "right" with no 1 and didn't give her one. Will definately offer one to no. 2. I feel it is something to offer baby if she is not hungry but wants some comfort. I do agree with other posts re getting rid of as soon as possible

Zynks

I have absolutely nothing against doddies/soothers/pacifiers/nu-nus. Each child has been a different story

Boy 1 used them until he was 4 - it was hard for him to let them go
Boy 2 used them and gave up by himself by the time he was 18 months old
Girl 1, currently 10 months old, flings the soother at you if you try to give her one.

For boy 2 we cheated a bit to get him off. We made a little hole on them when time to stop arrived. The fun was gone, and he just stopped caring about them.

lostinnappies

My eldist had a soother until he got all his teeth. He only got it at night time and NEVER during the day. My second had head cold after head cold when he was first born and never got into them because he couldnt breath through his nose. Some times I wish he had because now he is forever chewing on his fingers and taking chunks out of himself.lol

Gyalist

My son finally gave up his when he was seven! However, it's since cost me a lot to have his teeth corrected. He's been wearing a retainer for the past 14 months and gets braces next month which he will have to wear for at least a year.

Eyeofthetiger

My now nearly 5 yr old DD had a terrible time giving up hers! We tried to wean her off it from about the age of 2 1/2. We didn't get her properly off it until she was 3 1/2 and even then my parents wouldn't listen to us and still gave her one when she stayed in their house!

She doesn't use one at all now (at least in our house) but I know that as recently as September my parents we still saying she "needed" it! My brother was also excusing it by saying loads of kids use theirs after school but I'm not so sure about that...? The worst thing is seeing the 6/7/8 yr old still with one stuck in their mouth and sometimes still in a buggy too!

Ok rant over now I swear

All in all I think they're fine up to the age of about 18 months but when you want to get a child off everyone has to be in agreement about it otherwise it's torture and prolonged

Am I insane?

shrapnel222

our eldest loved his dummies but we negotiated with him and he gave them up at 2 and a half. 3 difficult days ensued when he was tired or trying to sleep and wanted them back, but he got used to it very quickly. i can't stand seeing kids over 4 with them, it just looks so wrong!

embee

Never gave my daughter one, I really can't stand them. Nothing worse IMO than a three year old or older going around with a dud on their mouths.

nesf

My son didn't ever really show much interest in them, he'd suck on them for a little while but never got into the habit.

I'll probably offer one to the next kid. I don't see anything wrong with them for babies though I'd have strong reservations about kids over 2 still using them.

Grawns

Good thread Quality Little Bridget is nealy 3 weeks old and have been holding out on giving her one but I know she is using me as a soother and as we're cosleeping it can get to be a bit of a bother trying to latch her on in the middle of the night ( several times but she is still a tiny baby). Am going to do without a soother until she is 4 weeks at least and then perhaps get her one. She only ever cries for food or because of wind so with luck she won't need one. I feel for the parents of wailing infants and if a soother soothes I'm all for it.

IsThatSo?

My eldest two children never took one, never liked them as they were breastfed.

My third child (now 12 days old) is taking one when she has windy cramps in her tummy, she is bottle fed and took to a soother very well.

I dislike them, but like a lot of people, its more for the older children I dislike them. Babies need to suck, its a reflex, and it can be hard going having a new little one around the house without having to walk the floors to soothe etc:)

I am using it to solve a problem, she only gets it when she has tummy cramps, she does not get it going to bed etc. My first two children were extremely colicky I would have paid a small fortune for them to take a soother

Overall, I think they are a good tool if used properly.

LorDar

My two boys (3.5yrs & 2 yrs) never took a soother either - I did try to see would it settle them any but neither were interested. I am now thrilled I don't have the hassle of trying to wean them off!

I don't like them in older children either - but you could have the problem my parents do of having a 35 year old daughter who still sucks her thumb!:o (me!):o

Ickle Magoo

Neither of my two would take a soother which meant hours of walking the floor with them, even a couple of trips around the countryside at 3am just trying to get my wee man to settle. Neither are thumb suckers either, fortunately. I really don't like the whole pre-schooler sucking on a dummy look but I like my own 30-something dodgy teeth thanks to years of thumb sucking, less!

I think like most things concerning this parenting lark, there are pluses & minuses to both!

NextSteps

I wish I had had a soother when I was small, instead of learning to suck my thumb, which is a lot harder to give up!

Sleipnir

Horrible, disgusting, unneccessary things which are really for the parents comfort, not the child's.; to "pacify" them i.e. keep them quiet. No baby needs a soother. Human beings managed quite well without them for hundreds of thousands of years.

I just think it's wrong to fob them off with a plastic sucky thing. Hate them!

Sleipnir

Ickle Magoo wrote: »

even a couple of trips around the countryside at 3am just trying to get my wee man to settle.

I once drove from Dublin to Ballinasloe and back in the middle of the night with our first lad. Woke up again as soon as I pulled into the driveway.

littlebug

Sleipnir wrote: »

Horrible, disgusting, unneccessary things which are really for the parents comfort, not the child's.; to "pacify" them i.e. keep them quiet. No baby needs a soother. Human beings managed quite well without them for hundreds of thousands of years.

I just think it's wrong to fob them off with a plastic sucky thing. Hate them!

I thought that too til I got to the point where I would have sold my soul for just ten minutes of the day when the baby wasn't crying and more than 20 minutes sleep at a time at night and I just wasn't able to pacify her myself (for months on end). Not that it helped much but it did a bit....

my second wasn't in the slightest bit interested... all he wanted was boob.

shrapnel222

littlebug wrote: »

my second wasn't in the slightest bit interested... all he wanted was boob.

have no fear, he'll carry that well into adulthood.

Ickle Magoo

Sleipnir wrote: »

I once drove from Dublin to Ballinasloe and back in the middle of the night with our first lad. Woke up again as soon as I pulled into the driveway.

LOl, we had one of them too!

kaa

wel hen i was prgenant i was totally against soothers. but after my daughter came it was grand until she started teethin when she was just over 2months. it helped but she did get attached to it so me and my boyfriend only gave it 2 her at nap time. now @ 13months so only looks for it then which is great cause she is talkin more in her own way. and has more words and knows who is who. daddy is dada. mommy is mama and baby is baba and her new word that.

so really its a comfort 4 her which i think is not wrong cos we all hav things like that.

saoili

I was against the idea of soothers, not strongly, but I thought they were unnatural and there wasn't any need for them. That was before I gave birth. My little one (six months old) likes his soother, and at times it will help him calm down and/or go to sleep. It's a real godsend in the car seat. We always take it away once he's asleep and there doesn't seem to be much danger of him getting addicted to it. I can't remember the first time we gave him the soother, or why, but there have definitely been times I've been very glad of it.

marti101

My 2nd son was a crier non stop and i was walking up the rpad and this women said to me would you not give him a soother and i stopped and said what would he be like if he lost his soother.She stopped and looked at me as if the thought never crossed her mind he would be worse if he lost it.Rather than not having one.Anyway noy=t all kids who dont have soothers suck their thumb ive 3 and none of them did.Really more to do with the chils rather than they were given soothers as babies.

lostinnappies

Gyalist wrote: »

My son finally gave up his when he was seven! However, it's since cost me a lot to have his teeth corrected. He's been wearing a retainer for the past 14 months and gets braces next month which he will have to wear for at least a year.

OMGosh seven,

Gyalist

lostinnappies wrote: »

OMGosh seven,

There were extenuating circumstances. He only slept for about 5 hours at night so it was a case of allowing him to do whatever made him sleep for longer. Like many others, I was adamant that I'd never allow my child to use a soother, but reality is often very different.

waterbaba

I've no children, but I had a soother as a child, until I was 6 <blush>!! For the majority of those years I was only allowed to have it at bed-time though (and if I was really upset I was allowed to go into my room, have a little suck and then I had to put it back). The one thing I can't stand is when children talk with it still stuck in their gob!!

I will probably offer soothers to my children (if I'm blessed!), but hopefully they won't get as attached to theirs as I did to mine... I noticed recently that when I'm relaxed, or concentrating on something repetitive (like knitting, or driving) I tend to sort of flip the tip of my tongue backwards and sort of suck on it with pursed lips like I'm sucking a soother!!

I'm in my late 20s!!

(I'm also quite fond of a rubby-ribbon when I'm having trouble getting to sleep!! haha!!)

astrofool

marti101 wrote: »

My 2nd son was a crier non stop and i was walking up the rpad and this women said to me would you not give him a soother and i stopped and said what would he be like if he lost his soother.She stopped and looked at me as if the thought never crossed her mind he would be worse if he lost it.Rather than not having one.Anyway noy=t all kids who dont have soothers suck their thumb ive 3 and none of them did.Really more to do with the chils rather than they were given soothers as babies.

Kids usually have more than one soother (it's recommended to change them and get a new one every while), she probably looked at you in exasperation.

Banrion

My boy is breastfed and I had to give him a soother as he was using the boob just to fall asleep and I was withered. I went through 3 months of wondering about his 'addiction' and fretting about how hed give it up and how Id get him to give it up. He gave it up himself at 4 months.
Then at 8 months I gave it to him again to get him into his own room without breastfeed. And Ill tellyou Im not frretting this time. He has it andIm delighted. He loves it. He only gets it to fall asleep and I know from nieces and nephews that I can easily....well hopefully....get it off him eventually. He wont be sucking one on his wedding day anyway.
The soother saved me in early days of breastfeedng and looking back I wasted a lot of time worrying and soul searching about it. My next baby is getting it straight off if he wants it.

rosepetal

i dont really get what the problem is with soothers? as far as i know, no one ever got married with one in their mouth:), kids will give it up when they are ready. its a comfort object and provided its not affecting their speech, teeth whatever, i just dont see the problem.

marti101

astrofool wrote: »

Kids usually have more than one soother (it's recommended to change them and get a new one every while), she probably looked at you in exasperation.

She propbably did couldnt understand why he didnd have one.Its a foreign concept to some people, i didnt give my child a soother.And i know they usually have more than one,but usually only suck certain ones and i wasnt looking at 2 in the morning for soothers in Tescos for anyone.