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Brother making same mistake again

  • 13-02-2009 2:34pm
    #1
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,012 ✭✭✭✭


    Hi, My younger brother recently separated from his wife about 6 months ago.

    She was very domineering over him, it was his first proper relationship the marriage lasted a year almost to the day!! He was 26 when he got married she was 21.They had been together just under 3 years when they got hitched.So they were 18 and 23 when they met. She wouldnt let him come to my stag (i know!!) ,she nearly had a heart attack when i (his best man) organised a day and night out for him going as far as ringing and texting when we were out.These are just a few examples of her immaturity, from the moment they met she wanted to get married and he just went along with it like a fool.

    So ill cut to the point he left his wife as i said 6 months ago he is know back living with my parents and the ex wife is still in the house.
    The plan is that the house will be rented to the council to pay the mortgage and she will move back in with her parents.
    Since he left the wife he has been seeing someone else that he use to work with i know for a fact that he has been with this girl before the marriage ended. A few weeks back they were on to my folks who are too nice for there own good and the new girlfriend was whining how she was gonna be kicked out of her rented accomdation if she didnt pay an extra €100 a month so what happens.......... She has now moved in with my brother and my folks paying now €300 for the room.

    My mother asked me what i thought about the arrangement i told her fair enough its her house but i felt that it was crazy that she was providing the means for my brother to make the same mistake again.

    I feel he has gone from the frying pan into the fire and when i try and speak to him he acts like a child and tells me to shut up.

    I am all for people living there life how they see fit but as far as im concerned i think he is just making the same mistake again.


Comments

  • #2
    Otis Driftwood
    Closed Accounts Posts: 9,925 ✭✭✭Otis Driftwood


    Yikes,thats a tough spot.All you can do is leave him at it and he will eventually come to his senses.Having a younger bro that is very head strong and probably a bit insane Ive learned to let him off when he takes one of his random notions,unless he asks me directly for my opinion.Then I let him have it with both barrels.


  • #3
    redfacedbear
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 891 ✭✭✭redfacedbear


    There is not a lot you can do. You've tried talking to him and he doesn't want to hear what you have to say. If that conversation was unnecessarily confrontational perhaps have another go (using phrases such as 'I am worried that you might be making the same mistake again' rather than 'Why are you doing this to yourself again ya big feckin eejit?' ;))

    You've told your parents that you think they are enabling his errant behaviour. If they want to continue, that is their problem.

    Everybody involved is an adult and free to screw their own lives up as they see fit.


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