Premature ejaculation - advice??

LegacyUser

i'm being anonymous about dis cos quite embarrassed about my problem. i have been going out wit my girlfriend for 2 n a half years and had a gud sexual relationship. afta a year of having sex wit her, i started having a problem. i kept coming afta like 2 mins, she got frustrated n i felt useless for not being able to last. i have even went to de doctor n was told it wud jus sort itself out.

luckily i'm in a relationship where i can talk bout such problems but i feel selfish n a crap bf cos of my problem. any advice lads cos i love my gf n don't wanna lose her.

n please no stupid responses like "oh give me her number n i'll give her wat she wants"

minidazzler

I am not sure what you have tried so far, but, whack off an hour or so before ye have sex, even if you have to go to the jacks and have one on the sly.


Do you only cum this fast when trying to have sex, or when you are having your "alone time" too???

fabgooner

no no just sex. everything else is grand. people have told me to **** loads and it'll solve the problem and people have told me to stop **** altogether to solve the problem. i'm confused

kingtut

As a guy I would recommend the following....

When you are alone masturbate and get yourself to the point of almost ejaculating...right before you feel you are about to just stop doing anything. Resist the urge to ejaculate...Then when you have gone back to no longer having that sensation start masturbating again...Keep repeating this and then after a while let yourself ejaculate.

Hopefully by doing this you will learn how to stop yourself from ejaculating the moment you feel the urge to.

Best of luck!!

unreggd

Id say the latter

Try tone it down

Also, relax, and try other stuff

Sex isnt all about the actual penetration, and doesnt have to end there


Kegel exercises will help too

Hard to get results though as you have to do them consistently every day and be as abstinent as possible

good luck

kingtut

unreggd wrote: »

Id say the latter

Whose post are you referring to?

faith3

look into excercises - like kegel exercises - which excercise the pc muscles. combined with regulating and slowing down the breathing during the approach of orgasm these can inhibit and control ejaculation. i suggest looking into books on "tantric" sex, many of these which are easily available have practical techniques in this regard.

fabgooner

thanks for the suggestions. are kegel exercises difficult to do and how much of a difference is to be expected

ZENER

Have you considered that it might be a symptom of a fading relationship ? Sometimes the situation can manifest itself in lack of interest, lack of creativity or PE.

I'd suggest, skip the penetrative side of the sex and do other things like oral or manual and see if you still get the same feelings from your time with your partner.

Ken

fabgooner

ah no its not a fading relationship. i'm still as fascinated about her as i was the day we met. our sex life is great apart from sex. oral and manual is great. its just the sex that is letting me down

oh and i have tried the stop-start technique, doesn't work for me

aare

Better idea...

The honest-to-god, in a class of his own, best lover I ever had, also had your problem.

So he worked with it, and spent a couple of hours on foreplay so tender, relaxed and imaginative I sometimes used to wonder if he had a choreographer, and used "the sex bit" as a full stop to stick on the end...

I think he had got his head into a place where penetration and orgasm wasn't the POINT anyway...because he was always just exactly as tender and passionate after an orgasm as before...

Try it, it might work for you too...

aspasp1

When you are about to *** just start counting reverse numbers from 100. Or divert your attention in something completely not related to, may be a routr from doulblin to galway, start thinking of it. and i am sure you will last longer then slowly build your confidence that you can do it. and you will be fine then.

fabgooner

aare wrote: »

Better idea...

The honest-to-god, in a class of his own, best lover I ever had, also had your problem.

So he worked with it, and spent a couple of hours on foreplay so tender, relaxed and imaginative I sometimes used to wonder if he had a choreographer, and used "the sex bit" as a full stop to stick on the end...

I think he had got his head into a place where penetration and orgasm wasn't the POINT anyway...because he was always just exactly as tender and passionate after an orgasm as before...

Try it, it might work for you too...

ya dat sounds like a very good idea thanks did you not get frustrated that you were not having lasting sex and not coming from sex??

fabgooner

aspasp1 wrote: »

When you are about to *** just start counting reverse numbers from 100. Or divert your attention in something completely not related to, may be a routr from doulblin to galway, start thinking of it. and i am sure you will last longer then slowly build your confidence that you can do it. and you will be fine then.

haha now if she only knew that i was trying to think of anything else than her during sex lol.
i've actually tried counting, trying to distance my mind and think of other stuff, worked slightly sometimes

ha i've tried quite a lot to solve this, year and a half had this problem.

just bad lover perhaps??:(

Terodil

- Cold can help, esp. your feet
- Rings can help
- Medication (salves) can help (talk to GP)
- Fingers can help (i.e. look after her first)
- having sex more often can help

dudara

Threads merged due to duplication.

To the OP, there is no need to post your thread multiple times. When you post unregistered, it does not display automatically. It will only be displayed when a moderator approves it for public viewing.

dudara

Piste

Durex do a type of condom called "performa"- it has some sort of local anaesthetic in it which dulls sensation and apparently makes you last longer. I'm a girl so I've never tried it and I've no idea what they're like, might be worth trying though.

Otis Driftwood

Piste wrote: »

Durex do a type of condom called "performa"- it has some sort of local anaesthetic in it which dulls sensation and apparently makes you last longer. I'm a girl so I've never tried it and I've no idea what they're like, might be worth trying though.

Used these once and once only as an emergency.Feckin horrible,it made my peep feel really weird,especially afterwards and my then G/Fs bits felt weird too,sort of a burning sensation.Not pleasent so I would avoid em like the plague.
As for the O/P cant add anything apart from the above as Ive never really had this particular quandry.

aare

fabgooner wrote: »

ya dat sounds like a very good idea thanks did you not get frustrated that you were not having lasting sex and not coming from sex??

You make sure your lady is well satisfied FIRST - then get the timing right and you can often have a simultaneous orgasm too.

Frustrated? NO WAY!! He really WAS the greatest ever.

AJG

Durex make a 'Stamina Pillow' apparently. You get a choice of three hags but it might have the other half running out the door.

http://www.ebaumsworld.com/pictures/view/80520336/

fabgooner

i tried performa but i didn't see any difference, certainly no burning from them thank god.

ah aare u seem like the greatest ever. being so understanding about such a problem

haha oh my god, them stamina pillows would kill the mood completely, the state of them lol

wylo

AJG wrote: »

Durex make a 'Stamina Pillow' apparently. You get a choice of three hags but it might have the other half running out the door.

http://www.ebaumsworld.com/pictures/view/80520336/

LOL:D:D:D

LegacyUser

DDunno about the performa but have you tried just using a condom ? Might help.

Talliesin

fabgooner wrote: »

ya dat sounds like a very good idea thanks did you not get frustrated that you were not having lasting sex and not coming from sex??

She's just described lasting sex that made her cum.

Sex does not mean sticking things into other things.

Learn to have sex. Step one would be re-reading that post.

aare

fabgooner wrote: »

ah aare u seem like the greatest ever. being so understanding about such a problem

Thanks, but not really...

See, all you have to do is learn how to REALLY make love with your lady, and there will be no need for and "understanding"...

Good Luck

Nevyn

wylo
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Thaedydal

RHunce

just passing through and although you kept your original post private you forgot to keep the others that you posted on this thread private also.

but im sure your problem is a common one and that it will work itself out like you were told by your doctor

generalmiaow

OP you're not going to get useful advice from the internet other than PC exercises, start-stop and *caine creams, be they performa or the various creams available (which should only be recommended by a doctor)

If your doctor told you it would sort itself out, you are either quite young (in which case it will) or you need a different doctor, someone more specialised. There are off-label uses for medications that a doctor with sufficient experience and knowledge of your medical situation can safely prescribe. I won't go into them here, but a doctor with experience of treating psychiatric disorders as well as one who treats psychosexual ones would know them well.

In the meantime, you could find that giving yourself some attention, mar dheá, before you give your lady friend any, can delay things somewhat as well as enable you to free your mind enough to distract yourself. (edit: just noticed you mentioned this in your second post. definitely more and as close to the occasion is better for you, as long as you don't do it in some weird way)

On distracting yourself, while I still advise going to a new doctor, a friend of mine found practising meditation in a relaxing setting to be a great aid in controlling these sorts of phenomena.