What's his problem?

LegacyUser

I have this friend lets call him John.
me and John have been friends since September last year and get on like a house on fire.
However,
sometimes he is my best friend and other times he snubs me on the street. He makes really nice kind gestures towards me but then I hear him slagging me off to his friends.
He goes out of his way to help me out, but logs out of facebook when I log in or blocks me from his chat list.
I tried talking to him about it but he said I was being paranoid,however he has snubbed me at a gig on front of friends which was very embarrassing and I wasn't the only one who noticed. He looked at me as if he'd never seen me before in his life.
What's his problem,I don't want to lose his friendshp as we get on really well and have a lot of fun when we are together...
I though maybe i was coming on too strong but in fairness, i'd never ignore a friend on the street like that, i think i have a right ot be slightly peeved
Should i play tit for tat and ignore him back or just cut him out of my life altogeher(although we frequent the same circle and i often have to work with him)

pwd

Some people are very two faced and act different ways depending who they are around. They just want to ingratiate themselves with everyone. Maybe he just thinks you're not cool enough to be seen with in front of his cool friends.
You can't trust people like that and sadly their friendship means fnck all when it comes down to it.

HouseHippo

pwd wrote: »

Some people are very two faced and act different ways depending who they are around. They just want to ingratiate themselves with everyone. Maybe he just thinks you're not cool enough to be seen with in front of his cool friends.
You can't trust people like that and sadly their friendship means fnck all when it comes down to it.

I totally agree with this.
Due to the fact that you guys work together and share friends I wouldn't be nasty or take any drastic action just don't go out of you way to please him or spend time with him.
Be civil when you se him and if he ignores you just shrug it off,make it look like you don't care.

Pen1987

This is going to sound like I'm taking the piss but I swear I'm being totally honest...


make sure he does not have an identical twin.


Seriously, this type of thing happened me in the past!

CDfm

Some people are fickle and John is.

He doesnt seem cool to me and you should not be so fawning to him.

You can see with your two eyes what he is like. Find a new friend and ignore the guy.

Chinafoot

Unregistered wrote: »

I have this friend lets call him John.
me and John have been friends since September last year and get on like a house on fire.

No you don't. He's not your friend.

Unregistered wrote: »

sometimes he is my best friend and other times he snubs me on the street. He makes really nice kind gestures towards me but then I hear him slagging me off to his friends.
He goes out of his way to help me out, but logs out of facebook when I log in or blocks me from his chat list.
I tried talking to him about it but he said I was being paranoid,however he has snubbed me at a gig on front of friends which was very embarrassing and I wasn't the only one who noticed. He looked at me as if he'd never seen me before in his life.

If anyone treated me like that I wouldn't waste my time on them. He's not your friend. Friend's don't treat their friends like that.

Unregistered wrote: »

What's his problem,I don't want to lose his friendshp as we get on really well and have a lot of fun when we are together...

What friendship? Why would you want to be friends with someone who ignores you when it suits them, embarasses you in front of people, slags you off to their friends and then tried to make out like its your problem when you ask him about it? He sounds like a prick who gets a kick out of messing you around tbh.

Unregistered wrote: »

Should i play tit for tat and ignore him back or just cut him out of my life altogeher(although we frequent the same circle and i often have to work with him)

I'd go for the second option. Playing tit for tat will get you nowhere. This guy sounds like a nasty piece of work and will most likely kick your ass when it comes to game playing like that.

Don't waste any more time on this tool. Invest your time in your real friends who won't treat you like shít.

LegacyUser

OP people used to think i ignored them but i had really bad eyesight and found it hard to spot people

do you ever see him squinting?

Chinafoot

Unregistered wrote: »

OP people used to think i ignored them but i had really bad eyesight and found it hard to spot people

do you ever see him squinting?

Would squinting explain the part where he slags the OP off to his friends?

thebigcheese22

I wholeheartedly agree with Chinafoot, I've had a 'friend' just like 'John' and at first its great, ye get on great and you think hes such a cool guy. But eventually I realised that he was a complete ****, dissing me behind my back, secretly going after my ex etc. These kind of people might be popular but they will never have true friends coz they are fickle and shallow.

dny123456

Pen1987 wrote: »

This is going to sound like I'm taking the piss but I swear I'm being totally honest...


make sure he does not have an identical twin.


Seriously, this type of thing happened me in the past!

It's happened to me too. Apparently i have a twin out there. I couldnt figure out for ages why this girl in work in my last company was weird with me. Until after about a year they told me... there was a complete knob end who used to make their life (hr) hell. He left the company around the same time i joined and she thought I was he.

Karen_*

Don't let him treat you like that OP. Cut him off, its not acceptable behaviour. Set boundaries for yourself and don't allow them to be crossed. If he thinks bad of you then so what. Sometimes you've got be be the bad guy to someone else to be the good guy to yourself.