Shyness and Social Anxiety and Anxiety

Happy Monday

The three demons above have destoyed my life!!

Anxiety is making life difficult for me at work - difficulty in meetings - anticipatory anxiety before meetings - stress after meetings and presentations. It's also had and still having a massively negative impact on my ability to cope with social occasions and so on to the point where avoidance is preferable.

My quality of life has been reduced to nothing as a result.

Has anyone out there who has been naturally shy and suffered from the above problems advice on how to come through this - all help appreciated.

Kevster

Hi,

Are you a Happy Mondays fan? They're okay, I guess

Anyway - look - if this has now reached the point where your overall quality of life has diminished, then you must call your GP, arrange an appointment, and then actually follow thruogh and GO to that appointment. You can go to as many websites as you want, but you will be unlikely to really get the core help that you need.

i was shy/anxious for my entire life and left it too late, which resulted in a series of suicide attempts. After simply going to my doctor, however, my eyes were opened to a world of help.

Kevin

cmhoshea2002

Sorry i dunno how to start a forum. I really feel down for the past few months not feeling like myself at all, have been taken my meds, going to councilling, youga and breathing exercises. I really feel lost now does any one know what i mean

Luckyduck

Hey Happy Monday,
I had to reply when I read your post. As I used to be exactly like that. I used to get so nervous about things that sometimes I will actually get sick. I'm now in my early 30's and its only in the last 4 years that I have gotten over all this. Of course I still have my bad days but mainly good ones. So here is what helped me:
- I did not go on medication but carried rescue remedy which are herbal drops you can get in the chemist, I used it as a back up just in case
- I learned yoga and breathing techniques
- I found that if I could make a joke in conversation that it relaxed me and others
- Also people like to talk about themselves so if you are feeling nervous just ask them questions about themselves, this will may you feel more in control as people will open up more. Also you might find that you can identify with them so you could give a little information in return.
- Read every bit of information that you can get on anxiety and social phobia, I found 'Feel the fear and do it anyway', Panic - Aine Tubirdy, 'the little book of panic disorder' all very good. I have read more than that but the names escape me.
- you need to be kind to yourself and reward yourself if you do achieve something that was hard to do
- remember most people around you are probably feeling just as anxious or are too preoccupied to be worrying how other people appear.

I could write loads more on this topic as I so understand what you are talking about. All I will say is that you recognise the problem so you will help yourself if you really want to change. Good luck!
L:)

LegacyUser

I feel your pain mate. Social Anxiety is such a debilitating illness and it takes incredible mental strength to get through each day when you have to deal with this illness. But there is help out there. Can i refer you to the link below ...........

http://www.socialanxietyireland.com/faq.htm

You should contact Odhran McCarthy on the contact page of the above website and arrange a screening. The course is 14 weeks long and is specifically aimed at people with medium to severe social anxiety.

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Plenty of exercise is very important if you are serious about overcoming or minimizing social anxiety. Good diet, no sugar, no coffee and going easy on the alcohol will also help you significantly.

If you have any deep rooted issues that are unresolved they may be contributing to your anxiety without you actually being fully aware. For me, i had a particular issue that i'd buried away for years that was causing me anxiety on a subconcious level and it was only when i confronted it and dealt with it that i fitted another piece of the jigsaw on my road to recovery.

I still get nervous and sweat and feel my stomach turning from time to time but i have much better coping skills now due to using all of the above and i don't give myself such a hard time when i percieve that i've made a mess of a social situation.

You can overcome social anxiety or make it very manageable but it does take a fair amount of effort and willingness to be open to change. Good luck with everything.