Advertisement
If you have a new account but are having problems posting or verifying your account, please email us on hello@boards.ie for help. Thanks :)
Hello all! Please ensure that you are posting a new thread or question in the appropriate forum. The Feedback forum is overwhelmed with questions that are having to be moved elsewhere. If you need help to verify your account contact hello@boards.ie
Hi there,
There is an issue with role permissions that is being worked on at the moment.
If you are having trouble with access or permissions on regional forums please post here to get access: https://www.boards.ie/discussion/2058365403/you-do-not-have-permission-for-that#latest

How Moses got his 10 commandments

  • 23-01-2009 12:37pm
    #1
    Jay D
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,738 ✭✭✭


    God went to the Arabs and said, "I have Commandments for you that will make your lives better.

    The Arabs asked, "What are Commandments?" and the Lord said, "They are rules for living."

    The Arabs said "Can you give us an example?"

    "Thou shall not kill."

    "Not kill? We're not interested."


    So God went to the Blacks and said, "I have Commandments."

    The Blacks wanted an example, and the Lord said, "Honour thy Father and Mother."

    "Father? We don't know who our fathers are."

    God then went to the Mexicans and said, "I have Commandments."

    The Mexicans also wanted an example, and the Lord said "Thou shall not steal."

    "Not steal? We're not interested."


    He went to the French and said, "I have Commandments."

    The French too wanted an example and the Lord said, "Thou shall not commit adultery."

    "Not commit adultery? We're not interested."


    Finally, God went to the Jews and said, "I have Commandments."

    "Commandments?" They said, "How much are they?"

    "They're free"

    "We'll take 10."

    There!!!! That ought to offend just about everybody


Comments

  • #2
    SJPRogue
    Closed Accounts Posts: 58 ✭✭SJPRogue


    Thou shalt not take the lord's name in vain...

    And the Irish answered:

    "Ah for F*cks sake! Jesus mary & joseph are you for f*ckin real, ye tick bloody son of a brithish bastad whoor, ye! who d'ye tink ye are anyway wit dem airs n graces? Ye know wot ye can do wit em? ye can shov em where wit yoo de sun probably does shine.

    Is it god ye call yerself? i'll bleedin sho yoo wot god is, ye rat-bastad................"

    And god felt despair & the need for something to soothe his nerves and so created whiskey, but the Irish stole it from him.

    So he created guiness. But they stole that too.

    And so he invented wine.

    So they sent him over to the pansy french.


Advertisement