I Love You

LegacyUser

Hi, I know that there has been quite a few threads on the subject of love etc already. I hope no one minds me adding another!. I've been going out with my boyfriend for little over a year now (some of it has been long distance). When we were falling asleep together last week, we started talking about stuff that had been said a couple of months back, on quite a tipsy night out (he said he was falling in love with me, I said the same.. that sometimes I thought I did love him...it was never mentioned again until last week).
I finally said I love you straight out to him, because I do. I've gone out with a couple of people before, but he's the first one, that I've felt like this about. We just click so well together. He said it straight back to me.

The thing is, with his last relationship, the girl said it first and he said it back. He told me that it messed things up as he didn't think he properly felt it etc, but said it at the time...

I'm now a bit afraid the same thing has happened with us.I've no idea if he really feels it and since I said it first, I'm doubting it. Maybe he now thinks I'm more into him than vice versa. Has this ever happened to anyone else who said 'I love you' first? thanks.

Overheal

have you had a chance to ask him yet?

Terodil

I'm all for addressing things head-on but that's one of the few things where I'd advise caution. There are a few questions that people (usually men I guess) find very hard to answer, and that is 'Am I fat?' and 'Do you love me?', amongst others. There's either no answer that's appropriate or only one, rendering the question obsolete.

OP, I would just suggest you wait and watch. If he does love you, you'll notice by a myriad of little things. Actions speak louder than words anyway, and they'll tell you a lot better than the three (possibly formulaic) words. Does he just randomly stop what he's doing to just look you in the eyes and kiss you? Does he go out of his way to do little things for you, does he surprise you?

Don't dwell on it too much, it will turn into a mindgame and while some people enjoy it, most probably won't. Love in a relationship deepens over time anyway so even if the first 'I love you' might have been somewhat shallow, it will get ever more meaningful over time.

LegacyUser

Yea, I wouldnt read too much into it. I know I wouldnt just say I love you for any reason. I find it extremely hard to say and would only say it when I most definetly meant it. I know if I was with a girl a couple of months and she said I love you then my alarm bells would start ringing and I would think its time to leave but after a year I mould prob be extremely flattered but may still not say it back. Maybe because of his last relationship getting messed up at a similar point he doesnt want this one to go the same way so he is just being more careful.

If he really does love you than you wont need to coak an "I love you" response out of him, he will say it in his own time. Wouldnt you rather it was meant than said just for the sake, wont it mean much more when out of the blue and you least expect it, he just looks you in the eye and says "I love you". Just relax and let it be otherwise it could get blown out of proportion and lead to the end of the relationship.

Liam Byrne

Quit analysing.....if you keep asking him "was it true" then he'll start thinking/wondering about it too.

The thing is, with his last relationship, the girl said it first and he said it back. He told me that it messed things up.

So things that happened in the last relationship automatically happen in this one ? Then I'd get out quick, because the last thing that happened in that last relationship is that it became OVER......so what's the point ? May as well get out now, eh ?

I hope you can see where I'm coming from; enjoy what you have, say what you feel, be true to yourself and wander along enjoying the journey and see where it leads ye.....

Best of luck!

sid4lev

Didnt do this until today, when i randomly started thinking about my ex, but its almost heartwarming to see people logging onto a thread to talk about love. Im a guy who hasnt conversed on the topic for a long time...good memories long gone. Appologies for the random post