fear or something?

LegacyUser

my OH and I decided to start trying for a kid a few months back.
a few weeks ago she announced the good news that were pregnant. Yippie !

She was ecstatic.

Almost from that very second I felt panic. I mean real panic. Since then I seem to be having some really weird thoughts, and when she talks about the baby I start to feel sick, and sometimes feel like I just want to run away.

I don't think I have ever handled commitment well to be honest - but this is insane, I know when my child is born I will love this little angel for ever with all my heart - but what the hell is wrong with me, why can't I cherish this special time we have together ?

Of course I cannot ask any of my dad friends if this is normal as I'm sworn to secrecy till we know all is well, so I am asking any dads out there - is this normal ?

LegacyUser

I think it is .In fact I would imagine she may or will have similar fears.It is only normal I suppose. What are the weird thoughts you are having?

That_Guy

You should have a look at the parenting forum on this site and get advice there. Might be of some use to you.

Das Kitty

I've seen this before with friends, it's quite common!

I'd say once the baby is born all these doubts and feelings will go away.

Good Luck OP

Beruthiel

headFried wrote: »

I am asking any dads out there - is this normal ?

Never mind the Dads.
When I was pregnant I was terrified.
Absolutely hated being pregnant and found the whole process something to avoid at all costs.
It wasn't until the first month or so after the birth that I really took to being a mother.
So, as far as I'm concerned, it's normal to feel fear, stress and a huge pressure to be a grown up, responsible adult.
Take that on board and know that it will pass eventually.
Until then, just live through it as best you can, it won't last and when you get to the far side, you'll be grand.

Congrats btw

DinoBot

Hell yeah its normal.

Scares the life of you ! It will pass, then when they're born it pulls up a whole new type of fear

Don't worry about it but don't let it get out of hand either.

littlebug

Completely normal. When you think about it, it's probably the biggest and most important event of your life so far but it's also something that you have absolutely no control over so your fight or flight (in this case flight) instinct is kicking in. The best you can do is read lots about what is going on in the pregnancy and what to expect. Get yourself over to the fathers thread on the pregnancy forum... I imagine most of the other fathers over there feel exactly the same.

VeryBerry

As someone who is 5months pg (completely unplanned!) I can say what you're going through sounds completely normal to me!

I'm still finding it very hard to be excited about my pregnancy, and I can't get my head around the actual idea that there'll be a "baby" here in a few months (fingers crossed everything goes ok). And of course I feel guilty that I'm not delighted when everyone around me it so happy....

I also had really weird ideas the first few months.... When the baby was born I was going to leave it with my partner and imigrate to Oz or the US...I was going to put the baby up for adoption...I wasn't going to have it at all...etc etc... All of which of course made me feel even more guilty!

I think the best advice I can give is just accept what you're feeling is normal - and maybe talk to your OH about it. She might be just as frightened as you.