Help my choose a new personality for myself

Shmuck

Right basically I've decided that in order to get a woman I need to change my personality. At the minute my personality is a bit nothingy to be honest. Most people would describe me as a "loner" and "a bit odd." So really, any change in personality can only be a good thing.

I've only ever had 1 girlfriend, that was when I was 15 and she only went out with me because she was in love with my mate and wanted to get close to him in the hope that something would happen. I was completely aware of this, of course she never said such a thing to me, but it was a sort of understanding we had. I was just happy to be going out with a girl who I could snog and get handjobs from, so didn't mind the fact she had little, if any, interest in me. I'm now 24 and really think its about time I got me a woman.

I'm quite happy with the way I look, I buy what I think are trendy clothes, I always make sure I smell nice, and always make an effort to look good (but I'm not a metrosexual or anything like that). So really the only area I think I can improve is my personality, which as I've said, leaves a lot to be desired. So I was thinking of having one of the following personalities:

-Doormat/arselicker type: Someone who always puts other peoples needs before theres. Someone who feigns interest in other peoples problems and pretends they want to hear about them. This person will do there best to make the other person feel good, and will constantly shower them with praise and complements (no matter how true they are). This personality type is very effective (I've seen it work for others) but I'm not sure if I would have the patience to carry it off without killing someone eventually.

-Nice guy: Someone with a pleasant personality who is always sensitive to everyones feelings and won't offend anyone ever. The type of person who puts up with people no matter how big a cnut they have been or how irritating they are. This person will often be seen giving change to homeless people and helping old grannies across the street etc.

-Moody/brooding/mysterious loner type: This would probably be the easiest personality for me to take up since I'm already a loner. Girls often like mysterious type guys in films and ****, but I'm not sure how this would work out in real life, I'm not sure how I would meet girls with this type, they would have to approach me which I can't see happening.

-Quirky/random/out-there type: I wouldn't have included this in the list, but in school there was an ugly fcuker with this personality type and he had quite a good looking girlfriend so maybe girls like this personality?

-Funny guy: Girls love guys who can make them laugh (or so they say at least) so I could brush up on my humour and build a little repertoire of funny/witty lines that I could throw out every now and again and pretend they are off-the-cuff and this could work perhaps. I did have this personality type when I was younger and it worked a charm (not in getting women but just getting people to like me in general) but I gave it up after a few years because there was so much pressure on me to be funny all the time, I felt I always had to be "on" and could never relax.


This is a question more aimed at the ladies but everyone please feel free to chime in with your thoughts. If you think of any other personality types that could be good for getting a lady please let me know. I will read every post but can't guarantee that I will reply to every one. Thanks for your time.

MagicMarker

You can fúck off if you think I'm reading all that.

Karl Hungus

Why not become a serial killer? You'll get about 50 marriage proposals a day that way.

Shmuck

MagicMarker wrote: »

You can fúck off if you think I'm reading all that.

just vote in the poll so

MagicMarker

Shmuck wrote: »

just vote in the poll so

You're not the boss of me!

I choose other guy.

Cool_CM

Try being bono, that slot has just become available as he's bored of being himself apparently.....
http://www.breakingnews.ie/entertainment/mhsnmhmhgbkf/

giggsy664

Ladies lounge?

Shmuck

MagicMarker wrote: »

You're not the boss of me!

I choose other guy.

but I could be that other guy, just tell me which guy to be

Biggins

Where's the "Can't and will never make-up my mind shmuck" option?

Shmuck

Biggins wrote: »

Where's the "Can't make-up my mind smuck" option?

just listen to your heart and I'm sure you'll choose the right one

donmeister

I chose other,to be a gimp,mind you its not far off your personality type now,so it wont be too hard to readjust

cHaTbOx

so did I MM


Have your own personality and get that fuck out there.
As long as you are not a bastard(some women like this ), pay some attention , have your own thought opinions, enjoy your own company,
there is no reason why you should have to pretend (no point either as it will get figured out).

You need to get out there. Work on law of averages that one in hundred will say yes ,so just get out there. Nothing worse than not being yourself.

shenanigans1982

Its the internet...you only have two options, you can be the "funny" guy or the "I'm tough" guy. But both positions are already filled by millions of people

Acacia

Stay yourself. You sound cool- a loner who's funny once you get to know him.

...But this is After Hours so you won't listen to my sensible suggestion...

ShaneU

Being a nice guy won't get you girls, believe me, I've 22 years experience in the subject.

eVeNtInE

This post has been deleted.

Craft25

Be a mysterious Loner, but don't brood, brooding never got anybody anywhere!

Wibbs

Be your own man, but be a man. Basically know what you want and go for it in all aspects of life. Be fun. Be open, but not emotionally incontinent. Be noticed, but too noticeable. Keep an air of mystery. Keep an air that you have value and won't take crap from anyone. Have boundaries basically. That'll get people to want to be around you and that includes women, or...........

.....Sit in the corner of the bar licking your eyebrows. That'll get the ladies too.

tony1kenobi

Be gay. Because you are gay.

Wibbs

Shmuck wrote: »

-Funny guy: Girls love guys who can make them laugh (or so they say at least)

yep thats what they say, but comedians often get good because they don't get laid.:D Women like men who don't take themselves seriously. They like men who don't take the women in their lives and their frivolous issues that seriously, but acknowledge they exist. They want a guy who will take the real crap seriously and support them. That's what women mean when they say they like "a sense of humour". It does not mean you're robin williams every time you open your gob.

Seriously though, yore ma? Have I chance? I can sit licking my eyebrows all night if that oils her axle......

LolaLuv

I choose funny guy. You're probably not very funny, and I relish the thought of someone waking up one day and deciding to be funny, only to find that everyone's laughing at them instead of with them.

Shmuck

Wibbs wrote: »

yep thats what they say, but comedians often get good because they don't get laid.:D Women like men who don't take themselves seriously. They like men who don't take the women in their lives and their frivolous issues that seriously, but acknowledge they exist. They want a guy who will take the real crap seriously and support them. That's what women mean when they say they like "a sense of humour". It does not mean you're robin williams every time you open your gob.

Seriously though, yore ma? Have I chance? I can sit licking my eyebrows all night if that oils her axle......

good post......up until the your ma bit, for shame

Saibh

Change of username might help:)

LolaLuv

Saibh wrote: »

Change of username might help:)

This. Try something a little less degrading, like "putz".

Shmuck

PillyPen wrote: »

I choose funny guy. You're probably not very funny, and I relish the thought of someone waking up one day and deciding to be funny, only to find that everyone's laughing at them instead of with them.

sure 90% of comedy is just copying other peoples jokes but putting your own slant on it so its less obvious

FlutterinBantam

Why don't you call yourself 'Jerk' instead of 'Shmuck'.

That would be a good start.


On second thoughts, hang a heavy boot or shoe off your cock and keep lifting it.

You will be a real ladies man in about a month.

JerryHandbag

Serious response = Better to be disliked for being yourself than being liked for being someone you're not!

After hours response = Convince the birds that you're related to Patrick Swayze. You just cant lose with that one.

Abi

Wibbs wrote: »

yep thats what they say, but comedians often get good because they don't get laid.:D Women like men who don't take themselves seriously. They like men who don't take the women in their lives and their frivolous issues that seriously, but acknowledge they exist. They want a guy who will take the real crap seriously and support them. That's what women mean when they say they like "a sense of humour". It does not mean you're robin williams every time you open your gob.

Seriously though, yore ma? Have I chance? I can sit licking my eyebrows all night if that oils her axle......

Riiight ohhwn.

I haz no thanks button. So, I give you this: You give me a little damp patch. ;-)

I pick other. Yourself ftw.

00112984

Where's the option for
"98 year old billionaire with a heart condition, no living relatives and a packet of viagra"?

LolaLuv

Abigayle wrote: »

I haz no thanks button. So, I give you this: You give me a little damp patch. ;-)

I think responses like this are better reserved for PM. In the regular ol' forum they're just a weeee bit...awkward. Yeah. TMI.

Shmuck

tony1kenobi wrote: »

Be gay. Because you are gay.

Say that to me again and I'll rape you good. You won't **** right for a month. Who'll be the gay one then.

Abi

PillyPen wrote: »

I think responses like this are better reserved for PM. In the regular ol' forum they're just a weeee bit...awkward. Yeah. TMI.

Lmao. You are definitely under other ;-)

Karoma

Shmuck wrote: »

Say that to me again and I'll rape you good. You won't **** right for a month. Who'll be the gay one then.

I would advise against angry internet warrior jerk guy. It gets you banned and your threads locked.