Paternity test pre-abortion?

LegacyUser

Hi,

My girlfriend and I are travelling to the UK in a month as we have decided to abort.

I have a suspicion that it was not me, (we live in different parts of the country and only see each other once every 2 weeks). The doctor said she was 6 weeks pregnant, but i know i didnt sleep with her around the time. 8 weeks or 4 weeks may have made sense. How close are these estimates? Is there anyway to get the exact date it was conceived?

I caught her texting some guy recently(in the last 2 weeks, twice), and I saw these texts and asked her who they were. She grabbed the phone and hide it, and refused to show it to me saying it was just a friend, which seems very strange.

She has cheated on me in the past twice before, which i thought i was just getting over, so to find her texting a guy for the third time really hurts.

I'm no angel myself, and have cheated on her once before. The first time she cheated, she slept with a friend, the second time she says it was just a friend, and the third time is explained as above.

Sorry, I just don't want people coming on slating her. Feel free to slate the both of us, cause i think we are doomed too!

No i don't use condoms, we took the risk and got stung (if it is the case that it is mine!)

Nevyn

There really is no way to go back and figure out when exactly she ovulated and when over the 3 day window she concieved. Whe the dr says she is roughtly 6 weeks pregnant it could easily be + or _ two weeks either side of that as it is based of her giving the date of the start of her last period.

An abortion or termination should be done between 10 and 20 weeks and really at that stage a paternity test is not possible on the fetus.

littlebug

Pregnancy is calculated from the first day of the last period so if your girlfriends doctor told her she is six weeks pregnant it means it is four weeks since conception.
Edited to add- this is based on a regular 28 day cycle which can vary as stated by Thaedydal above.

MagicMarker

As soon as you get back go your separate ways as your 'relationship' is a joke.

And don't be a complete moron, wear a condom.

Sam Vimes

no the doctor's estimate wouldn't be accurate enough that 2 weeks proves it's not yours. as i learned in the how pregnancy happens video stickied in the forum, sperm can stay in the seminal pool for about a week after sex and leaves the pool in waves to try to fertilise the egg

but that doesn't mean she's not cheating on you, it just means you can't prove it by that method

MagicMarker

MagicMarker wrote: »

As soon as you get back go your separate ways as your 'relationship' is a joke.

And don't be a complete moron, wear a condom.

Oh yeah, and don't forget to get tested for STI/STD's.

LegacyUser

Thaedydal wrote: »

There really is no way to go back and figure out when exactly she ovulated and when over the 3 day window she concieved. Whe the dr says she is roughtly 6 weeks pregnant it could easily be + or _ two weeks either side of that as it is based of her giving the date of the start of her last period.

An abortion or termination should be done between 10 and 20 weeks and really at that stage a paternity test is not possible on the fetus.

Cheers for the helpful reply

Bottle_of_Smoke

Sounds dodgy to me. There are ways to test the paternity of a foetus but it's invasive surgery. The kind of thing she'd know about. Not the kind of thing it would be reasonable to insist on.

It probably would be possible to test the foetus afterward but I'd imagine its her eh.. property? and undoubtedly something the clinc won't perform

Basically she'll know, so you'll have to ask her. From her behaviour, past and the (potentially) dubious dates I'd say there's a good chance its not yours but she's probably convinced herself it is in order to have someone go over with her.

She's not going to accept otherwise so based on the fact that you had unprotected sex with her and the also good chance it is yours, it is your responsibily to go with her.

After it's over talk to her about it. If you want a medical answer maybe an STI test might shed some light.

LegacyUser

MagicMarker wrote: »

Oh yeah, and don't forget to get tested for STI/STD's.

Will do. Last was clear, but i reckon we'll both go again soon.

As for your relationship is a joke comment, i wouldnt go that far. I thought it was a pretty good one, very close to each other. Once we are living together we should really find out.

I'm at least going to give that a chance before going seperate ways.

LolaLuv

silly-billy wrote: »

Will do. Last was clear, but i reckon we'll both go again soon.

As for your relationship is a joke comment, i wouldnt go that far. I thought it was a pretty good one, very close to each other. Once we are living together we should really find out.

I'm at least going to give that a chance before going seperate ways.

She's cheated on you twice and there's good evidence that she's doing so again. Why bother??

HalloweenJack

You've both cheated on each other. You clearly don't trust her and she isn't totally open with you.

IMO, after the abortion breaking up is the best ption for both of you.

Wibbs

PillyPen wrote: »

She's cheated on you twice and there's good evidence that she's doing so again. Why bother??

My thoughts exactly. You're going to move in with someone who has cheated at least twice and possibly a third time and you've cheated on her. And you say you're in a "pretty good" relationship? I'm sorry but it doesn't sound like a particularly good one to me.

LegacyUser

Well lets say that she has cheated 2 or even 3 times, which i don't think she will admit as she is as stubborn as myself. I have done the same...

We are a huge distance away from each other at the moment. We won't be able to live together for another year at least. We have been going out for 3 years and the last year has been long term, much like the next year will be.

We both use all our holidays to see each other, we've been to new york, berlin, paris, prague, spain together.
We enjoy each others company and love each other(though ye may think not)

You guys really think I should throw it all out the window?

00112984

Have you asked her if there's a chance it may not be yours? She may not know that you're suspicious of these texts from the other guy.