Waster... messy rant

LegacyUser

I feel like just a parody on how not to do things.

Was in a long distance relationship with a girl I thought I loved at first. Then I questioned if it was love, I decided it wasn't.
I thought it would send her into a depression if I ended it so i pretended to love her. I even wished she would dump me so i wouldn't have the responsibility of it.
But then I completely and utterly fell in love with her. I really thought she was the one. She changed my life. I had always vowed never to have kids, but when i thought of them as our kids, I opened myself up to welcoming it.
But now she has fallen out of love and has ended it. I can't really describe the darkness and pain in my head at this. It is my fault as it was soured from earlier in the relationship when I had doubts....I rarely called, wrote.

We have decided to be just friends, and we end up sleeping with eachother. Then there is the next problem. I couldn't get it up. It was embarrasing to say the least. But oh no....didn't I then get up to go to the bathroom and walk straight into the door with a wallop.

I'm a complete and utter waster!

vibrant

OK, what issue are you looking to resolve here?

funloving

Is your main concern not being able to have sex with her?or do you wanna win her back?
I read you stayed friends...well,maybe you shouldn't have sex in the first place as this would make you feel worse and it would take longer to get over her!

Long distance relations rarely work unless both are equally committed and put a big effort in it..

LegacyUser

I'm not looking for answers. I just wanted to get it off my chest and write it down....