Not able to speak to people

tall7

There are very few people in my life who I can talk to, people who I am relaxed in their company. It affects all aspects of my life, social, work, family everthing.

My job is not going well at moment and all problems have ther roots in me not being able to talk to people. I am not able to talk boss even though he is very easy to get on with. There is no way I will ever be able to get a job with a boss who is so approachable.

I am almost 30, good looking, good job, and I think most people would consider me a nice person, a decent guy. I have never had a girlfriend and unless I change never will.

I dont feel sorry for myself, I am very lucky, have so many opportunities, have been dealt a very good hand in most aspects of my life. I just dont know what to do?

Kirnsy

start by talking more to the people you feel confident in talking to and expand from there. this is a problem you will be able to overcome with CONFIDENCE

smile when youre talking to people and have some eye contact. that would help a conversation no matter what length to run well.

sin mar ata

I think you should seek professional help. You just need to build up your communication/social skills. There is nothing wrong with you but a consellor or a thearpist of some kind would give you specific techniques for improving these skills.

allabouteve

tall7 wrote: »

There are very few people in my life who I can talk to, people who I am relaxed in their company. It affects all aspects of my life, social, work, family everthing.

My job is not going well at moment and all problems have ther roots in me not being able to talk to people. I am not able to talk boss even though he is very easy to get on with. There is no way I will ever be able to get a job with a boss who is so approachable.

I am almost 30, good looking, good job, and I think most people would consider me a nice person, a decent guy. I have never had a girlfriend and unless I change never will.

I dont feel sorry for myself, I am very lucky, have so many opportunities, have been dealt a very good hand in most aspects of my life. I just dont know what to do?

If its because you tense up, maybe try seeing a hypnotist.

Years ago a friend of mine had social problems related to his extreme shyness, he was very determined to beat the problem and went to various confidence building seminars and attended assertiveness courses, but it was when he went for hypnosis and learnt the self help techniques that he really reaped the benefit.

I know everyone's different, but it might be worth checking out. Make sure you go to one with a good reputation though.

JoeyW

I feel like I'm reading a thread about me, I'm in the very same boat myself. I find I can never relax in one on one situations, especially when I have to be face to face with someone. I even feel like this with my closest friends, sometimes even family. I feel like I have nothing to same.
I have a funny sort of a boss, once she gets close to people she will relax, open up and even have a laugh. But with me..zilch! She treats me like I'm no-one and I know it's my own fault because I can't relax or hold a sentence.
I feel for you...