Friend won't go away

LegacyUser

Hi,

This is a bit of a strange one, I moved to Ireland about three years ago and when I did most of the friends I had in England didnt keep in touch which is fine, it was just one of those things. One friend got in touch with me about three months ago which was nice she was having problems at work (and has since been made redundant) she visited and that was fine, since the she has began to see out neighbour. She visited again for over a week just before xmas, I work nite shifts and was working all nite coming home then getting pestered by her to take her out all day which i did for a quiet life. She asked to come over in January and I explained that i have other things on in January my dad is visiting and I am just getting over xmas. Well now I got a phone call a couple of nites ago she has booked her plane tickets she will spend her nites with the neighbour then will be expecting me to take her out shopping after work again. She is upset with me because I said it wasnt fair just be be expected to drop everything. When she is over she is very critical of me and my husband, what ever we do is wrong so I am surprised she wants to come again. What do I say? I dont want to even come home next week becuase I know she will be on the doorstep I feel that I at least deserved a phone call before she booked the tickets from either her or my neighbour and I dont feel its fair any ideas on how to handle the situation ??? Am I wrong?? I am not sleeping worrying about it

Diggy78

To me it would seem an obvious and unattractive answer. You just tell her that you're not going out with her after work because you just dont want to. Sounds to me she needs to be made feel very unwelcome. I know that probably sounds more direct than you had planned but I'd say it's best. Just an opinion.

Mr. Incognito

It seems like she's coming over to see your neighbour rather than you, I mean she's staying there isn't she.

I wouldn't worry about it. She won't be relying on your for stuff to do it seems

BroomBurner

If she turns up on your doorstep, just tell her you're busy and to enjoy her stay with her new partner. Be polite, but really firm. If she doesn't take the hint after that, I'm afraid you're going to have be less polite in what you say. Not the time to be a doormat anyway.