a day of darkness part 2

busted flush

As the lingering dark strode on past noon, the leaders found silence and the scientists lost reason. It was only the preacher who held his voice, as this was a day destined for men who hypothesise from the heart. In a vacuum of guidance, he had seized his chance to sound the bells, a sign of knowledge surely, a call to arms. There was a full house that day, not for the first time, but for the first in a long while, and its noisy babble was hushed to a mumble as with reverend grace and theatrical poise the preacher took centre stage, and silenced his flock with a raise of hands. Then he gave the delivery of his life.

He spoke of the end, of redemption, of the gods and their ilk. He granted us one last chance before judgement, a final fling of adherence to the moral codes we had long deserted, and for once he held an audience, towering above us, delivering with aplomb. I heard him speak of rights and wrongs, of love and hate and how we were all now equal, stripped naked only for the cloak of our humanity. The final hours were not to be spurned on mourning and regret, but in celebration of life in the bosom of those we held dear. There were tears and wails, prayers offered and sins confessed but in that cauldron of fear, this man reigned supreme in his soothing of the masses. It was thus, on the day the sun failed to appear, that I first listened to a preacher and did exactly as he ordered me to.

And I was not alone. Soon the town found silence in the throes of abandon as the masses paid homage to the words of the reverend one. Of course there were those that ridiculed the fleeing, but their accusations lacked the gravity that one assumes with certainty, because the darkness of the day had greyed the horizon that separates the rational from irrational. No, there was only to be one course of action, gods or no gods, appeasement or none, fear of the unknown had rendered today, the day of the preacher.

Matt Holck

it captures an antisipation in it's flow
ideals lifted to the sky only to be lost in the cloads
outside the four walls of the church
words twist on the wind from one mouth to the next

ElCrapula

This is really good stuff.I thought alot of part one and you have kept it up.
Honestly,You should send this away for consideration to be published.
Like part one,I admire the flow.Not one word is lost or wasted and your choice of vocab seems inspired.
The imagery is clear and touching.
I think you have ENORMOUS potential as a writer.Once again,this is right up there, with part one,as the best thing I have read on this forum.
Very well done.

sitout

Incredible. :eek:

holden c

Hey, pretty damn good.
You're not going to leave us hanging now are you?

sitout

holden c wrote: »

Hey, pretty damn good.
You're not going to leave us hanging now are you?

well???????????

20somethings

Guys I urge you to look at his other work, it is NOTHING like this. At all, especially the grammar. This has to be stolen.

I would not accuse someone of such a thing unless I was sure of it. And I'm sure of it. Google yields no results.

magicass

20somethings wrote: »

Guys I urge you to look at his other work, it is NOTHING like this. At all, especially the grammar. This has to be stolen.

I would not accuse someone of such a thing unless I was sure of it. And I'm sure of it. Google yields no results.

harsh thing to say with no proof , however i do see where you are coming from. Still harsh all the same

busted flush

20somethings wrote: »

Guys I urge you to look at his other work, it is NOTHING like this. At all, especially the grammar. This has to be stolen.

I would not accuse someone of such a thing unless I was sure of it. And I'm sure of it. Google yields no results.

7 posts by you mmmm. I suppose you are a long time reader first time poster.
I am disappointed but i wont raise to the bait.

Insect Overlord

20somethings wrote: »

Guys I urge you to look at his other work, it is NOTHING like this. At all, especially the grammar. This has to be stolen.

I would not accuse someone of such a thing unless I was sure of it. And I'm sure of it. Google yields no results.

If you had really done your research you would have noticed that the OP came under much criticism for lax use of grammar, and has since made a much greater effort to use spell checks and other forms of revision.

Poor call sir.

20somethings

An File wrote: »

If you had really done your research you would have noticed that the OP came under much criticism for lax use of grammar, and has since made a much greater effort to use spell checks and other forms of revision.

Poor call sir.

Yes and SUDDENLY reverted back to his old ways in the next posts. Still trying to prove this. And harsh or not, I don't care. You guys are too nice on this forum.

Fartmonger

20somethings wrote: »

Yes and SUDDENLY reverted back to his old ways in the next posts. Still trying to prove this. And harsh or not, I don't care. You guys are too nice on this forum.

I don't really see what spelling and grammar has to do with literary expression :P

busted flush

20somethings wrote: »

Yes and SUDDENLY reverted back to his old ways in the next posts. Still trying to prove this.

This is something you will never be able to prove, as it is completely an original piece. Keep on trying though because it will be as frustrating as it will be fruitless.

Sarky

This is way more trouble than it's worth.

20somethings, don't ever make accusations like that without something to back them up.

busted flush, saying you won't rise to the bait and then rising to the bait does not make it ok.