Am i wasting my time with her

LegacyUser

Male mid forties

Foreign girl in local supermarket i really like. Mid twenties i would say and yes i know i am lot older. Anyway for quite some time she gave me impression we had some connection Hard to explain. When i would be a different till queue she would see me and it was like we would share a secret smile that seemd to blot out everything else. I used to play with her when handing the money I would suddenly take it away joking.

My ex said this girl and i are flirting. I know a lot of the girls in tyhe supermarket and chat and joke with them but never got impression they are into me but did with her

Tonight I met her and it was raining. Asked her if she wanted a lift home but she said no. Had planned to ask her out if she accepted. Genuinely like her not just lust.

Should I have drove after her tonight asked her again told here how I feel? Should I ask her out? Or should I leave it up to her if she is interested. She seems shy blushes a bit when talking to me but also to others. really pi&&ed off over this advice would be apreciated

Chatterbeast

Don't follow her or drive after her, you'll surely scare her away then. Alot of these foreign girls are shy. I was a manager in a warehouse with about 20 women from different nationalities under me, and anytime I said hello to them, they blushed and giggled. As it turned out, I asked one of them out (Slovak girl 10 years my junior) and she said yes to my surprise. We're still together, with a baby, 4 years later.

Just ask her out. The worst she can do is say no. But at least you'll know where you stand then. Best of luck!!

LegacyUser

Chatterbeast wrote: »

Don't follow her or drive after her, you'll surely scare her away then.

yes figured that so didn't just feel if she is shy i am going to have to make the running but if she isn't i do not want to bekicked in face so to speak

Alot of these foreign girls are shy. I was a manager in a warehouse with about 20 women from different nationalities under me, and anytime I said hello to them, they blushed and giggled. As it turned out, I asked one of them out (Slovak girl 10 years my junior) and she said yes to my surprise. We're still together, with a baby, 4 years later.

Just ask her out. The worst she can do is say no. But at least you'll know where you stand then. Best of luck!!

she is a slovak too and seems really nice. i think a lot of irish women are smug she is refreshingly different. Can some female give a view point could she be just shy?
can you give me any insight to slovaks?Thanks

MagicMarker

I think the fact that she refused a lift from you should tell you something.

No offence, but I think you're reading too much into it. However if you don't play you can't win.

Trinity

I wouldnt accept a lift from a man i only knew from the supermarket either tbh. Dont take it as a knock.

Ask her out straight in the cold light of day would you like to go for a coffee sometime?

Its not easy being knocked if the answer is no but at least your head wont be wrecked anymore.

Or the answer could be yes but there is only one way to find out.

cafecolour

I wouldn't say turning down a lift, essentially from a stranger, equals a no - it's generally a sensible decision, safety wise, for a young woman. She'd be alone with you in a car, you'd know where she lived, etc.

Def ask her for coffee. You really have nothing to lose, there's not reason not to.

LegacyUser

Deffo ask her out... Without a doubt, I am a 36 year old devout bachelor. You have nothing to loose, you don't work with her or anything, seems everyone she works with knows you have a crush on her, so it will come as no surprise.

All she can say is no! And if she does you will get over it.

I have asked out and dated girls I have met day to day (ie not in a pub) some include a hairdresser that was cutting my hair, supermarket girl, sandwich maker, receptionist, two chemists and a doctor.

Best of luck and let us know how you get on.

In$omniac

If you don't ask you will never know, just because she refused a lift from you does not mean she wont want to date you.

Unregistered wrote: »

i think a lot of irish women are smug

Nice :rolleyes:

Bob the Builder

In$omniac wrote: »

Nice :rolleyes:

Personally, I think it's true to be honest. While I still feel that there's loads of nice women out there, a lot of them really come across as being really snobby. It's in their personal nature tbh compared with that of other countries (but there are many worse countries).

As for the OP, bare in mind that if you do get rejected, it *may* be awkward going into the shop again. I had the same thing happen to me. And trust me, the other women at the till know exactly whats going on, and they probably know even more than you do.

thejAcketBag

your probably too old for her. i mean, i dont know of many girls wanting to date a bloke who works in a supermarket and is in his 40's...

Cheeky_gal

mid forties wrote: »

I used to play with her when handing the money I would suddenly take it away joking.

LMAO!!

mid forties wrote: »

Should I have drove after her tonight asked her again told here how I feel? Should I ask her out? Or should I leave it up to her if she is interested. She seems shy blushes a bit when talking to me but also to others. really pi&&ed off over this advice would be apreciated

You will be continued to be p*ssed off if you don't do somthing over it. Look at it that way, so do something!!! Say it to her

LegacyUser

thejAcketBag wrote: »

your probably too old for her. i mean, i dont know of many girls wanting to date a bloke who works in a supermarket and is in his 40's...

I do not work in the supermarket she does and your comment re men in their forties who work in supermarkets is a prime example of the smug attitudes of irish women I do not like and why I prefer people like her

And I know of men in that age group who work in supermarkets and there is nothing wrong with them. I cannot believe you said that

LegacyUser

Cheeky_gal wrote: »

LMAO!!

why do you find that so funny? And i use to do magic too like disappearing the coin but i am not very good at it

Say it to her

thanks for your support:)

LegacyUser

Bob the Builder wrote: »

As for the OP, bare in mind that if you do get rejected, it *may* be awkward going into the shop again. I had the same thing happen to me. And trust me, the other women at the till know exactly whats going on, and they probably know even more than you do.

actually i do not really care about that. Anway there are loadsa shops ;-)

Silverfish

thejAcketBag, please read threads before commenting.

Unregistered wrote: »

I do not work in the supermarket she does and your comment re men in their forties who work in supermarkets is a prime example of the smug attitudes of irish women I do not like and why I prefer people like her

You're sortof alienating a lot of the people you're asking for advice with those comments, you might want to ease up on that.


Just ask her out, you won't know til then, and I'm not sure if we can tell you what she'd think.

[Jackass]

mid forties wrote: »

I used to play with her when handing the money I would suddenly take it away joking.

mid forties wrote:

why do you find that so funny? And i use to do magic too like disappearing the coin but i am not very good at it

Text book peado material. Shame she's not 6. OP if you like the girl then just bite the bullet and do it!! Ask her out! I reckon the best way would be find a day that it's quiet, like a mid week afternoon if you're not in work, or late on a Saturday or something, and if she's in casualy que with a few bits and bobs, if you're really inteligent you'll think of using a item of shopping as your que / conversation starter, but I'm not inteligent enough to come up with anything better than going up with a jar of kenko and saying "Do you like coffee? - Me too - want to go for a coffee with me sometime?" (the following items on the convarebelt would be tea bags, strawberry milkshake, microwave dinner for two and travelers guide to paris - just incase she doesn't like cofee, back up plans )

Anyway, try that and I would say another thing - IF she sais no, it could be down to initial shock / emmbarressment, so I would say come back a few days later (again when it's not busy) and just casualy mention, "So no chance of that coffee? I'll make this tenner disapear..." and see what she says after having time to think about it (and see it coming this time).

A second no and you better find a new supermarket buddy.

Best of luck though, let us know how you get on.

LegacyUser

Silverfish wrote: »

You're sortof alienating a lot of the people you're asking for advice with those comments, you might want to ease up on that.

think they are alienating themselves this is a serious question and making il informed comments re paedo material i do not like that is disgusting .please close this as is not being taken seriously

Silverfish

Unregistered wrote: »

think they are alienating themselves

You don't know the gender of the people making those remarks, to call them 'smug women' is not acceptable.

Unregistered wrote: »

this is a serious question and making il informed comments re paedo material i do not like that is disgusting .please close this as is not being taken seriously

That was a joke, admittedly in bad taste. The rest of the advice was acceptable.