Would prefer "part-time" girlfriend

LegacyUser

Im 22, just started college this year. I have a girlfriend who I really like but just seem to have more fun with my mates.

I like her a lot but she seems to want to see me a lot more than I do her. When we're older I expect this to change but right now it bothers me that I cant have the crack with mates

Another problem is if she comes out with me and my friends she expects me to talk to her most of the night.

The relationship is as monogamous as any other, I'm not out scoring girls when shes not there or anything

is this just odd? Am I just not as interested in her as I should be? This was my first thought but I've thought about all the girls I've ever been with, the first love and da ones I pined over etc. even if I was with them I still think id rather it was part-time.

LegacyUser

Nothing wrong with you OP, I reckon lads are just a better laugh in general. Whether they're your GF or not women just dont do the whole "pub banter" thing very well, and tend to be a bit of a drag, this one sounds a bit clingy

Nevyn

You need time out with your mates and to do things with out her.
Why not talk to her about this, or try prempt her tagging along by setting in advance what nigths you are going to see her instead of leaving thing so casual that she ends up out with you. There is a lot to be said for having a 'date' night set aside for just the both of you that way she feels she is getting enough attension lavished on her and you get to have you your own life back.

Silverfish

smotheredguy wrote: »

This was my first thought but I've thought about all the girls I've ever been with, the first love and da ones I pined over etc. even if I was with them I still think id rather it was part-time.

This bit stood out to me.... 'even if you were with them'?

It reads like you preferred some of these girls to your current gf.... if thats the case, and combined with the fact you prefer time with your mates, and want a 'part time girlfriend', I would say maybe the single life would suit you better.

MagicMarker

Silverfish wrote: »

This bit stood out to me.... 'even if you were with them'?

It reads like you preferred some of these girls to your current gf.... if thats the case, and combined with the fact you prefer time with your mates, and want a 'part time girlfriend', I would say maybe the single life would suit you better.

I concur.

OP, it doesn't sound like you're interested at all tbh. Do your girlfriend a favour and break up, so she can find someone who'll want to see her as much as she wants to see them.

Having time with your mates is grand, but when you freely admit that you'd rather be with them than with your girlfriend then something's wrong.

Pyjamarama

MagicMarker wrote: »

I concur.

OP, it doesn't sound like you're interested at all tbh. Do your girlfriend a favour and break up, so she can find someone who'll want to see her as much as she wants to see them.

Having time with your mates is grand, but when you freely admit that you'd rather be with them than with your girlfriend then something's wrong.

I second that. It just seems like you're just not that into her. It's normal to want to hang out with your friends but you don't seem particularly bothered about spending time with her as you have more fun with your mates. You're certainly not in love with her so allow her the opportunity to find someone who does love her. TBH it just seems like you want the perks of a gf with none of the commitment.

lilmizzme

Pyjamarama wrote: »

I second that. It just seems like you're just not that into her. It's normal to want to hang out with your friends but you don't seem particularly bothered about spending time with her as you have more fun with your mates. You're certainly not in love with her so allow her the opportunity to find someone who does love her. TBH it just seems like you want the perks of a gf with none of the commitment.

Thats a bit harsh isn't it? The OP is 22, just started college, why would he want commitment? Ditch that part time girlfriend bullsh*t though, thats really dis respectful, and its not going to happen either, so get it out of your head OP!
Im 20, and if I was your girlfriend I would rather you just be honest with me. Tell her that you want a bit of time to yourself, to have fun in college, hang out with your mates etc. She'll probably have the sense to give you a bit of space, and maybe in a couple of months you might feel differently. If not, then at least you were honest and straight with her.
Actually on 2nd thought, maybe do all that after Christmas...now is an awful time to break up with your other half!


But seriously, dont drag it out to long, itll just get worse!

[Jackass]

You're young, maybe you're just not ready for a serious relationship? It doesn't mean you don't love her, just bad timing. Talk to her about it. Maybe she would agree that you both need to live life a bit and take a break from it.

That's if she doesn't think maybe she should be doing the same and you can both back off for a while whilst remaining together - but only see eachother once or twice a week for a while - give you plenty of time for mates and other things.

Whatever you do OP though, if you think she's worth it, don't throw it away just to go on the p!ss, there are other wats around it where you don't have to lose out on a girl you really like and who really likes you.

seahorse

OP, it sounds like you're just not ready for a relationship, with anyone. I think the only fair thing to do here is to tell her so. She has a right to know that, because while you're not getting what you want from her you need to remember that she's not getting what she wants from you either. As for "Part-time girlfriend" - lol, good luck finding one of those!