Funniest phrase to get you out of a social situation

shotgun mike

Personally I like 'better an empty flat than a bad tenent' after a particularly bad fart

javaboy

"I have over 5,000 posts on Boards.ie" usually gets me out of most social situations.

FX Meister

my fav is "go suck on your mothers tits" when someone askes me to do something I don't want to do

4Xcut

Well, there ya go I suppose!

Perfect if you drift away while someone is talking to you. It covers anything bar a direct question.

Turd Ferguson

"I'm sorry, I can't go out tonight...someone is being wrong on the internet"

Terry

Wow! look at that.

/runs away.

peanuthead

careful now

Biggins

I have to go to casualty. Someone threw a brick at my wifes breasts.
...three of my fingers got broken when it hit her!

themadchef

When someone congratulates you on being pregnant.... and you've just put on weight.





"Die biotch" is usually appropriate.

Nevyn

"Dog ****ed the pope, not fault of mine"

drunkmonkey

here's that feckin edjit in the tractor again, have to run..

javaboy

Am I the only one who finds it funny/sad that the thread title is "Funniest phrase to get you out of a social situation" and not "Funniest phrase to get you out of an awkward social situation"?

Hellm0

Depends on the social situation and whether I want to remain in contact with the person after my use of the phrase but my favorite catch-all has to be "I'm not wearing any underwear" followed by a slow but sensual lick of my front teeth.

Tends to rid me of whatever company I need it to.

Terry

themadchef wrote: »

When someone congratulates you on being pregnant.... and you've just put on weight.





"Die biotch" is usually appropriate.

I did that once. :

shotgun mike

javaboy wrote: »

Am I the only one who finds it funny/sad that the thread title is "Funniest phrase to get you out of a social situation" and not "Funniest phrase to get you out of an awkward social situation"?

you've to break a few eggs to make an omlette

G&T

"Sorry am having a blonde day"

Ment to say.............

Hellm0

Thaedydal wrote: »

"Dog ****ed the pope, not fault of mine"

Epic, Ether scene in that mad casino.

ScumLord

I've got AIDs and I'm not afraid to use it.

phasers

'Scuse me, I need a shoyt

shotgun mike

ScumLord wrote: »

I've got AIDs and I'm not afraid to use it.

whoa baby, lets not turn this rape into a murder

riff-raff

Ask Your Maaaaaaaaaaa !

Fizman

"Ah lads c'mon. I'm not racist! Sure i'd ride Beyonce!"

Got me out of one situation, and into another!

Bob the Builder

• Sorry lads, I gotta go for a wet one.
• I better go or <insert name here> will be having babies waiting for me.
• Don't forget you owe me €20 euro. I need it....
• *start itching your balls* - Christ, I could do with going to the jacks.
• *start talking excessively loud*
• Start giving them TMI about something... (herpes, girl I pulled last night, being gay, horses, music, other people)

Few other tricks as well, and I would give them to ye, but I have to go for a wet one lads.

Sam Vimes

Turd Ferguson wrote: »

"I'm sorry, I can't go out tonight...someone is being wrong on the internet"

http://xkcd.com/386/

idunnoutellme

That would be an ecumenical matter

What can ya do when you live in a shoe

longshanks

but she looked 18...

antodeco

I generally just drop my pants and start masterbating. Gets me out of ANY situation and feels good too....back in a minute...

Aodan83

"Oh,hey, I'd love to stay and chat, but I think you're a c*nt."If they can't take the truth/a joke(whichever is applicable) and never speak to you again, their loss!

Orange69

Sam Vimes wrote: »

http://xkcd.com/386/

Zing!

Turd Ferguson

Sam Vimes wrote: »

http://xkcd.com/386/

Lol, I've never seen that. There was one with a really fat guy with a real angry expression on his face working on a computer. I cant find that pic though.

hunter164

So I just kept applying the ointment and eventually the rash went.

[Jackass]

*Point to an empty seat*

"Have you met Bill?"