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Lonely??

  • 29-11-2008 12:15am
    #1
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭


    Lookin for advice from people in long term relationships, am in a 10+ year relationship, couple of kids, everything OK, no major problems but with all the lack of time and working etc we have no time together and when there is time together the OH isnt bothered to try and make it me and him time. I know, its not a big issue and should be easily resolved but its starting to really get to me about the lack of conversation, I will say how my day went but sometimes it feels like talking to a brick wall.

    Whatll i do. Asked a neigbour round tonight to see if that ease things but as soon as the neighbour left hes gone upstairs without a word to me.

    I am probably being paranioid but cant help the way i feel at the mo.I have no doubt that he loves me but i need more than that. Is that asking too much?? Am i being a paranoid selfish twit???


Comments

  • #2
    Carrigart Exile
    Closed Accounts Posts: 994 ✭✭✭Carrigart Exile


    Unregfornow wrote: »
    Lookin for advice from people in long term relationships, am in a 10+ year relationship, couple of kids, everything OK, no major problems but with all the lack of time and working etc we have no time together and when there is time together the OH isnt bothered to try and make it me and him time. I know, its not a big issue and should be easily resolved but its starting to really get to me about the lack of conversation, I will say how my day went but sometimes it feels like talking to a brick wall.

    Whatll i do. Asked a neigbour round tonight to see if that ease things but as soon as the neighbour left hes gone upstairs without a word to me.

    I am probably being paranioid but cant help the way i feel at the mo.I have no doubt that he loves me but i need more than that. Is that asking too much?? Am i being a paranoid selfish twit???

    Sounds like you are both exhausted, and to deal with that exhaustion you need to download and he needs a bit of fire-gazing. Trouble is that can be coming the normal behaviour, which it sounds like it has become. I've certainly been there and I think most people in long term relationships coping with kids and exhausting work schedules will have. Can you set aside one day per week/fortnight/month that is just for you two: go to the movies; swimming baths; pub; anything that breaks the cycle.


  • #3
    jessbeth
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 273 ✭✭jessbeth


    I don't think that your being selfish at all. I couldn't live in that kind of a situation. Could you get somebody to babysit for a night that you and the OH could get out for a night on your own. That would be the perfect opportunity to talk about it.


  • #4
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭LegacyUser


    Yeah, I know how you feel, I am going through the same thing myself.
    O.h is working away during the week but even when he comes home at the weekend, it seems as if he prefers not to be home, very grumpy and unhelpful with the kids ect.

    I have always disagreed with inter marital affairs but now I can understand why it happens.


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