How do you know you're an alcoholic

LegacyUser

I know I drink too much. But how does drinking too much turn into ‘being an alcoholic’. I’m 33 and I always have a glass of wine in the evening with dinner after work , then I might have another glass. Recently though I’ve started to notice that I ’ll be on my third glass of the evening without realising. So that’s 2-3 glasses, mon, tues, on Wednesday the girls come to mine and I would prob get through a bottle, thurs 2-3 glasses. The funny thing is on a Friday night I may not drink at all and same with Saturday, I nearly have to force myself to drink cause I feel it’s a waste, but more often than not I wouldn’t. Sunday I’d have a few glasses with dinner. Another thing is if I go out on the weekend, I would never so call ‘binge drink’ whereas I have a few friends who wouldn’t drink all week but at the weekend go mad and knock back the shots and vodka like it was going out of fashion, yet I’d be the sensible one who would see everyone got home ok. I suppose I justify it by thinking, I work hard all day and like to unwind and relax while I watch Desperate housewives or the apprentice. I never ever miss work due to drink, I never get hangovers since discover a fail proof remedy. I reckon I drink approx 4-5 bottles of wine a week. I know that is way way too much, but how do you qualify to be an alco. I mean isn’t an alcoholic someone who would drink anything? I wouldn’t drink vodka if it was on tap, I wouldn’t drink lager either. Could I stop drinking for a month ? no I don’t think I could, I certainly wouldn’t have a good night out without drink which is probably sad. I’m just wondering am I alone in this, is this completely ott. i guess what i'm asking is, how do you know when you've crossed the line into alcoholism. is there a ' if you answer yes to these five questions you're an alco' type thing you can do to find out. i don't binge drink, i just drink very regularly. is there a difference.

jellie

Could you live without it? Would you crave it if you couldnt have it?

Curlypinkie

This is such a difficult question. Especially in such an alcohol centred culture that we have here in Ireland.
Drinking alcohol is possibly the only thing you can do that is widely accepted socially to unwind.
At the same time alcohol and it's effect (you're saying it helps you relax) might be addictive.
Are there any other drugs you might be using eccept alcohol? Try putting in for example "smoking weed" into the sentences you have written above, instead of alcohol. Would you be a bit shocked?
I know I would. At the same time I'm pleading guilty to not letting one single week pass for the last year (or as long as I remember in fact) where I haven't been drinking something EVERY SINGLE WEEK. Unless I've been on medication. And even then sometimes...

I've questioned myself wether I'm addicted or not. I don't think there is an easy answer to your question. You don't sound like an addict but there are some statements you make that could point to the possibility of an addictive personality at least.

Bare in mind alcohol in moderate consumption doesn't harm your body. Consuming alcohol in large amounts not only harms your body but also impacts on your sleeping patterns, gives you mood swings and burns a slow but steady hole in your pocket. Just like any other addiction, be it refined sugar or heroin.

Do you feel alcohol is impacting on your life as a whole? Do you think it's difficult to stop after that first glass? Have you tried going out without drinking AND, what's most important, sticking to it?

I suggest you talk to someone close to you. Friend, other half, your mum or dad... someone that would give you an objective answer. What do they think? Do they think it's altered you as a person?

Also, try something else to help you unwind. A hobby, I know, such a cliche, but even start going out for walks. You can't do that with a glass of wine, right?
Check that for a week. Do something else, don't just sit there. BEcause whatever you're doing, if it's smoking, drinking, eating bisciuts... you're bound to do it quite mindlessly sitting in front of the telly, reading a book or surfing the net. All of asudden you're into that 4th fag, biscuits are all gone from the tin or.. whoops, that bottle of wine doesn't even look half full anymore.

Bottle_of_Smoke

never get hangovers since discover a fail proof remedy

Go on....

Anyway sounds like a bit too much to me. I don't think you're an alcoholic but your liver has to go through all those bottles of wine and it's not good for ya.

Perhaps don't drink monday and tuesday for a start? If that's impossible for you then perhaps you are an alcoholic.

Or just have one glass monday tuesday and thursday. Whichever suits you but you need to be drinking less.

The wednesday bottle perhaps keep it the same. Would be more difficult for you to stop seeing as it's a social thing.

AARRRGH

I think once alcohol starts (regularly) causing you problems, you've got an alcohol problem.

Have a look at this lovely picture: http://www.thestencil.com/archives/images/Horrors-Cirrhosis-lg.jpg

Even if you are able to "handle" your heavy drinking, that's what you're doing to yourself on the inside...

biko

Questions to Ask Yourself

First, think about your performance on the job. How often are you showing up for the day with a hangover? Do you note a significant difference in how you perform at your job after a night without drinking, as compared to when you "had a few drinks" the night before? Are you returning to your desk useless after lunch because you had a couple of drinks and are ready to coast through the rest of the day until you can get out? Are you known by your colleagues and superiors as the guy who?s always up for a good time, the woman who looks foolish at the office party, the one who?s late or absent more than a little too often? Have you been falling off your career track, taking work one day at a time until you get home to relax with a drink? It?s often difficult to answer honestly.


Relationships
How is your relationship with your significant other? Is your sex life suffering because after a night of drinking you just want to go to sleep, or because you are too drunk for your partner to have any interest in you? Do you find yourself arguing more frequently, or saying the wrong thing after a few drinks? Do you run to get a drink after a fight? Do you find yourself saying "I?ll show him" by getting another drink? Or are you without a companion, and in order to avoid those feelings of loneliness, you look toward alcohol instead? Try asking your partner how he or she would answer these questions about you.

tantipie

i have a glass of wine 2 or 3 nights during the week,,especially after a tough day,,i dont think it's the amount of drink or what the drink even is,,i think it's the fact that you have to have it thats the problem,,if you can take it or leave it then it;s not a problem,,

grizzly

"Could I stop drinking for a month ? no I don’t think I could"

I couldn't say if you're an alcoholic or not, but you've certainly got an unhealthy dependancy.

You could go to AA one night instead of drinking. It might be an eye opener.

Curlypinkie

biko wrote: »

Questions to Ask Yourself

First, think about your performance on the job. How often are you showing up for the day with a hangover? Do you note a significant difference in how you perform at your job after a night without drinking, as compared to when you "had a few drinks" the night before? Are you returning to your desk useless after lunch because you had a couple of drinks and are ready to coast through the rest of the day until you can get out? Are you known by your colleagues and superiors as the guy who?s always up for a good time, the woman who looks foolish at the office party, the one who?s late or absent more than a little too often? Have you been falling off your career track, taking work one day at a time until you get home to relax with a drink? It?s often difficult to answer honestly.


Relationships
How is your relationship with your significant other? Is your sex life suffering because after a night of drinking you just want to go to sleep, or because you are too drunk for your partner to have any interest in you? Do you find yourself arguing more frequently, or saying the wrong thing after a few drinks? Do you run to get a drink after a fight? Do you find yourself saying "I?ll show him" by getting another drink? Or are you without a companion, and in order to avoid those feelings of loneliness, you look toward alcohol instead? Try asking your partner how he or she would answer these questions about you.

In all honesty I think you can be addicted to a substance without doing any of the above. The above would probably be tell-tale signs of a die-hard alcoholic, but it needn't to go that far is someone tries to spot an addiction before things start to go out of hand socially.
I say fair play to the OP for asking herself (and us) these questions, but I think she needs to do a bit soul searching herself as well. There would probably be far more aspects to her life than she described.
If you deny you have an addiction, you might very well have one and I think she's floating somewhere between denial and acceptance and at the same time she needn't be an alcoholic. Yet. Crossing over to addiction is really easy if you don't question yourself and pull yourself back every now and again.

Anti

I think there are different types of alcoholics, the first is someone who wakes up in the morning and pops open a can or has a neat spirit/whatever. they cant start the day without a drink, this is the most severe kind of alcoholic.

The second, is someone that HAS to drink for no particular reason other then to get drunk. Medicially you would be classed as a alcoholic if you went over your weekly limit, but i think thats a croc of shite.

But i think it all boils down to, do YOU think that your an alcoholic? If so chill it with the drink, 2/3 glasses a night is far too much to be honest. Especially as im sure yout not havign the standard 125/175ml (small/large) per glass, im guessing you probably are hitting over 200ml per glass and you get 3 glasses per bottle. Not only is this pretty expensive, unless your drinking really cheap crap wine its also pretty expensive. For a decent bottle of wine i guess you spend what 15€/20€ ? And say you have a minimum of 4 bottles a week... thats about 240€ a month. Its also doing your kidneys, liver no favors.

I knew a woman that used to do the same as you, 1 bottle a night every night, then it went to 2, then to 3. After a few months she ended up breakign down as the drink was hiding the emotions of being molested by her brother over 6 years as a kid. She eneded up loosing her house and kids over it. Now im not saying you are drinking to hide any personal issues, but think about it

Peewee_lane

OP, only you can answer this question.

Do a little research online, and if you think you've reason to be worried at the end of it, go speak to a counsellor first.

Just by the by - I normally have one or two a couple nights a week, not wine now, a bacardi and coke at home, because feck it, I deserve it, but I dont rush home just for a drink. Although, a couple of months ago, I was in a bad work situation and I felt the drink mellowed me out in the evening.

Hey, it was better than smoking a joint.

Are you stressed out OP, work or family getting you down maybe? People turn to cigarettes and drink when they're down for comfort.

LegacyUser

Hi OP,

I was in the same boat as you not so long ago (getting through roughly 4 bottles of wine per week). For the most part, those bottles were drunk at home, during the week and alone. Also like you I would mainly drink mid-week. I knew it was becoming a problem for me when I'd get anxious at the thought of having a drink free night.

In the end, the issue for me was not that I was becoming an alcoholic, it was that I was bored and unhappy with my life. Having a few drinks just made it easier to face coming home evening after evening to an empty apartment and a pretty empty life. I've since moved and made a few changes and I don't drink nearly as much. I still enjoy a glass or two of wine maybe one evening during the week but now it's not something I feel that I have to have.

I think you really need to take a look at why you feel the need to drink as much as you currently do. And don't be fooled by the fact that you're drinking wine and not something stronger like vodka. 5 bottles of wine per week is still a lot of alcohol.

littlebug

Unregistered wrote: »

I know I drink too much. .

I think your first line says it all really. If you have reached a point where you know you drink too much then it's time to do something about it. I don't mean stop altogether but look for alternatives for those nights in. Or have those little mini bottles so you don't drink any more than that.

LegacyUser

well ask yourself this if someone can not live with chocolate does that mean they are addicted to choc or if someone can not live with hash are they a junkie??? can you go a week without a drink????

i had an ex how said he wasnt addicted but could not go without a drink (a big reasons why we broke up) 2/3 even 4 nights a wk he went out spent our money drinking and most of our bad issues came from it.

i do believe if you cant go without u are addicted! maybe fill you time with something else a hobby cause 1 glass has lead u to 3 which will lead you a a bt or 2 a night!

sam34

Manties wrote: »

Medicially you would be classed as a alcoholic if you went over your weekly limit, but i think thats a croc of shite.
QUOTE]

that is NOT true. i presume when you mention limit you mean the recommended max weekly intake for males and females (21 and 14 units respectively). exceeding these is unhealthy, but does not mean someone is an alcoholic.
there are guidelines and criteria in place to determine if someone is an alcoholic.
however, i think the op would be best directed to attend their gp, and discuss the issue with a professional, rather than relying on the opinion of randomers on the internet about what is a potentially serious health issue.

SUNGOD

for me , if alcohol causes problems in your life and you continue to drink then you are alcoholic .it could be you drink every day , once a week or once a month if it impacts badly on you and your loved ones lifes and against your better judgement you still feel you have to drink you are someone with a problem.
if eating grapes caused you heartache and misery you would not eat grapes ,simple. but alcoholics in denial blame everything except for the real problem.
to the op im not saying alcohol causes you these problems this is more a general statement from my personal expierence

Wantobe

the op would be best directed to attend their gp, and discuss the issue with a professional, rather than relying on the opinion of randomers on the internet about what is a potentially serious health issue.[/QUOTE]

Good idea. If it's real enough to discuss with your GP it might just hit home and if you don't already have a problem, well it might prevent one.

I have a few 'rules' for myself- no alcohol during the week, but I indulge myself in a couple of glasses of wine at the weekend. Usually on a Friday and Saturday but not every weekend. Because I have young children I don't tend to go out much anyway ( it's over a year since I was 'out' for the night- oh, okay, honestly it's two years:o) so that's about it for alcohol consumption.

I had a close relative who was an alcoholic ( and remains so) who was pretty constantly around when I was a child so I'm very wary of the dangers of alcohol. I enjoy wine but I am constantly aware of the bitter trap that it could become.

MagicMarker

I used to have a glass of wine in the evenings, just the one, maybe two. I did it because I liked it and because it helped me sleep. But after a few weeks I stopped because it's not a habit I wanted to get into.

I would consider anyone who has a dependence on alcohol, an alcoholic, regardless of how drunk they actually get. Give yourself a month without alcohol, if you can't manage that then you have a serious problem.

mazcon

Unregistered wrote: »

is there a ' if you answer yes to these five questions you're an alco' type thing you can do to find out. i don't binge drink, i just drink very regularly. is there a difference.

Google Alcoholics Anonymous, they have a list of 12 questions which are a good indicator of whether you have a problem or not.
One thing to remember though is that alcoholism is a progressive disease, so while you may not be a classic alcoholic right now, you may be heading that way. Be honest with yourself as no one else can really answer this for you. In answer to whether an alcoholic will drink anything, this is not the case at all. My dh is an alcoholic and in 19 years I have never seen him drinking spirits. It is the drug ethyl alcohol that causes the addiction and this is present in all alcoholic drinks. Also, it is not always the AMOUNT you drink but the problems caused that truly indicate if you are alcoholic or not. Best of luck OP I hope you can sort this out.

Karen_*

I'm an alcoholic and there are quite a number of drinks I wouldn't have drank. Alcoholics have taste buds too!!!

When I was questioning my drinking and allowing myself to consider the possibility that I was an alcoholic someone said to me 'normal drinkers are not going round in circles wondering are they an alcoholic.'

You definately have a dependency on some level. If I asked you to give up carrots for a month you could do that with no problem at all. Why not alcohol?

mskitten

if you cant go without a drink well yes you have a problem!! someone who cant go with out chocolate is addicted to chocolste! someone who cant go without drugs is a junike!!!

i had an ex who said he never a had drink problem but couldnt stop drinking for even one week!!!! which was the biggest problem in our time together!

maybe get a hobbie or something to fill your time watch a movie read a book etc

snorlax

try this quiz from the world health organisation http://www.infoscotland.com/alcohol/interactivedisplay.jsp?pContentID=79&p_applic=CCC&p_service=Content.show&

they go through all the affects on your body and there;s a drinking diary http://www.infoscotland.com/alcohol/male-diary.jsp?pContentID=154&p_applic=CCC&p_service=Content.show&

Firetrap

Maybe you're drinking wine as a habit as much as anything else. Try drinking alcohol free wine or one of those fruit drinks like Shloer.

Perhaps too, you need to do something different in the evenings. That might help keep your mind off the wine.

david

Can you lie on the floor without holding on? :P

Ah no when you look at most addictions, they are more often than not associated with a routine. If you can't carry out the same routine without craving then I'd consider it an addiction. Try Sunday dinner without your glass of wine..