I'm so pleased with the girth of my penis

Shmuck

I may have said it a few times but today I looking at my naked body in my bathroom mirror and must say that I have a rather aesthetically pleasing cock. It's not very long but enough so to have a pleasing flopped curve when I've got a semi... but my, my does it have a nice width to it. It looks ****ing great when I've just had a **** and it starts to calm down slightly so that it two thimbles of blood more than half an erection. As an estimate hold up your three middle fingers on your right hand... that is about the size in width. It's kind of comforting to know that I have that sort of circumference packing in my pants. I can talk to most women now with an air of confidence knowing that I may not poke their uterus but I will fill them. If only I had a bit more length then I would be as happy as a sand boy but I think I'd become to arrogant if that be the case.

*adele*

Then go fcuk yourself!

Berty

The human race will be proud of such a fine specimen.

What a knob

Fizman

In before the cock....I mean lock.

AckwelFoley

In before cock, erm lock

javaboy

"Thanked 43 times in 12 posts" out of a total post count of only 86? That is to be fair, a very girthy e-penis.

AckwelFoley

Lol...double postish

TestTransmission

Fizman wrote: »

In before the cock....I mean lock.

snyper wrote: »

In before cock, erm lock

weird :pac:

galwayrush

When did you get one?:rolleyes:

is it coincidence that your name, shmuck is the foreskin that goes during a circumcision?

Fizman

jackncoke wrote: »

weird :pac:

Indeed!

:eek:

brianthebard

*holds up fingers*

*compares*

Sorry to deflate you op but seems fairly average to me.

Feelgood

He defo has to be talking about the penis slap bang between the middle of his forehead, no?

Shmuck

Deleted User wrote: »

is it coincidence that your name, shmuck is the foreskin that goes during a circumcision?

nope just a coincidence, I have a happy amount of foreskin

sdanseo

Have it chopped off and put it in on display a museum if you think it's so fantastic. See how you like it then

Countdown to locking: 3..2..1..

Shmuck

brianthebard wrote: »

*holds up fingers*

*compares*

Sorry to deflate you op but seems fairly average to me.

in fairness though, you do have a withered hand

Random

Shmuck wrote: »

I may have said it a few times but today I looking at my naked body in my bathroom mirror and must say that I have a rather aesthetically pleasing cock. It's not very long but enough so to have a pleasing flopped curve when I've got a semi... but my, my does it have a nice width to it. It looks ****ing great when I've just had a **** and it starts to calm down slightly so that it two thimbles of blood more than half an erection. As an estimate hold up your three middle fingers on your right hand... that is about the size in width. It's kind of comforting to know that I have that sort of circumference packing in my pants. I can talk to most women now with an air of confidence knowing that I may not poke their uterus but I will fill them. If only I had a bit more length then I would be as happy as a sand boy but I think I'd become to arrogant if that be the case.

So, you fancy your cock. Congrats, you're gay!

Sharpshooter

Very nice OP , but have you got the balls to back it up..

figs86

Shmuck wrote: »

hold up your three middle fingers on your right hand... that is about the size in width

why specifically on the right hand????

Feelgood

I don't know what a tracker mortgage is.

Shmuck

figs86 wrote: »

why specifically on the right hand????

because I presume one of your hands will be on your cock or clit pleasuring yourself while reading about me describing my cock, you're only human after all

tony1kenobi

figs86 wrote: »

why specifically on the right hand????

Even more specifically, Jeremy Beadles right hand.

Berty

Shmuck wrote: »

because I presume one of your hands will be on your cock or clit pleasuring yourself while reading about me describing my cock, you're only human after all

Yet again, my laptop is on my lap(perfect place for a lap-top) and the battery is gently warming my penis and scrotum. I do not need to think of your mysterious "walter mitty" member.

She has "Im a celebrity" and I have the battery. Life is sweet

Shmuck

Random wrote: »

So, you fancy your cock. Congrats, you're gay!

no I just have mysexual tendencies sometimes

jester77

Fair play OP... it's good to have a fat one in times of recession :pac:

Fizman

So you find big fat cocks to be aesthetically pleasing?
Hmmm.

My work here is done.

Shmuck

jester77 wrote: »

Fair play OP... it's good to have a fat one in times of recession :pac:

yeah I just hope I can continue to buy as much food as I'm currently consuming in order to keep it in such fine shape, whenever I lose weight it tends to come off my penis first which aint good

AlmightyCushion

After Hours never ceases to amaze me.